hi everyone I'm Adrienne Everheart and tonight I'm going to talk about should you pay for a date if
you're dating and you're really trying to find a loving long lasting relationship with a man should
you be handling money paying for dates offering to pay for day it's feeling guilty like you should
pay for dates and what if the guy says I think we should just split this bill what do you do I'm
gonna give you answers to this and so much more first let's talk about should you pay for a date
now I have the opinion that a man actually needs to show you and demonstrate to you number one that
he's gonna invest in you not only timewise but financially now we're not talking about taking
you out to Ruth's Chris Steakhouse every night of the week and spending tons of money on you dates
need not be expensive you can have a coffee date as the first date which is what I suggest that's
anywhere from a three to seven dollar invest a second date can be something like a little bit
more like a lunch and if he wants to take you out to a nice restaurant or something like that let
him but a lot of times on the fifth or second date the guy might kind of allude to you picking up the
check or paying or a guy might flat out tell you I hate always having to pay for a date so this is
where you can use some of your scripting tools I'm gonna teach you and really learn how to connect
to his heart and let him know that it's really not about like Sakura and this guy added tons of money
to get him to date you as it is you're looking for a loving long-lasting relationship that leads to
marriage and one of the things you're looking for in a partner is knowing that he wants to invest
in you so a lot of ways that you can do this is first of all lead by example you don't have to
come right out and tell a man well I expect the man to pay for every single date instead have it
in your energy lean back see what he's willing to do and not do this is why you're dating him one
of the reasons we date a man is to find out what he'll do now if he does ask you to pay or want you
to contribute in some way it doesn't mean he's a bad guy however I do recommend the following
script I'm a little confused or I feel a little confused I we're on a date am i misunderstanding
let's say the man then says no I just think it's nice you know if you could pay a little bit if you
could offer this bill is a lot and I only ordered you know I ordered the Blue Plate special and you
ordered the steak or something like that so at that point you need to make a decision am
I going to see this guy again do I like this am I feeling invested in this relationship no make that
decision because of the the meal ticket situation but I want you to understand like am I feeling it
for this man or not like be honest with yourself most of us know by the third or fourth date if we
want to continue dating a man I really recommend dating at least three or four times because so
often we have so many walls and blocks around us so we can let a really really good guy slip
through our fingers because of all of these things we're telling ourselves or that we're
still in love with our ex or we have some opinion of how a man should or shouldn't be showing up he
confronts you in that moment and says well yeah you know I like you to contribute here's all you
have to say I don't feel sexy paying my way I don't feel sexy paying half I don't feel like
I'm developing a romantic relationship having to pay my own way that's how you feel so you
can use sexy or romantic relationship paying my way it's that easy if the guy says well then I'm
never going to date you again go oh my goodness I feel so sad about that but okay now at some point
when you get into a committed relationship you can have the conversation about money I know my
husband and I certainly did there were times after say like maybe date eight or so that I
wanted some fancy thing or appetizer or I wanted to get us special drinks or something like this
and I just totally did it I didn't even ask him I just ordered it and I paid for it I said I want
to get this and that wasn't me giving to get I was a guy this on a pedestal I wanted this
really expensive mushroom appetizer I got it for myself you see and a lot of times by the third or
fourth day you get a little better understanding of a guy's financial situation maybe he's not the
type of guy that you want to possibly marry then don't continue dating him if you know what it is
you want you know what you're calling forth into the universe go ahead and let this guy know you
have been a great company but I don't feel like we're a match there's nothing wrong with that
so again ladies just to recap if a guy says what I would like you to pay for half of this I don't
feel sexy paying my way or I don't feel like this is how I want to feel in a relationship paying my
way or I feel weird dating having to pay my own way and if the guy tries to guilt you or give
you a hard time why don't you just sit there and listen to him and just mm-hmm mm-hmm just kind of
listen and nod your head and listen to him spout off about all the things that are wrong with the
genders and finances and things like this but hold your boundary hold your boundary you don't
have to argue back but just stay where you're at so a boundary remember I talked about how you
draw a line in the sand you're over there and I'm over here as long as you're over there and you're
respecting my boundary I can just stand here and stay in my boundary so kind of have that energy
and that attitude about yourself and remember just because the guy's asking you to pay half
or alluding to it or if a man says hey I'm gonna pick up the tickets I was thinking you could buy
this or something like that it doesn't mean he's bad or wrong but any man that is asking you to
pay for something in my opinion he's testing you he doesn't he's not invested in your quality of
a woman just yet so again he's testing he's trying you out this is where if you do like
this man he's testing your boundaries you want to stick with yours if and you got to know what
your boundaries are before you go on a date so if you need to learn more about dating setting
up boundaries knowing what you'll stand for and what's really important for you this is
what isn't they really encourage you check out one of my programs such as thehm tool stem tolls teach
you all my femme tools it has a vast library and it teaches you everything you need to know about
dating 500 ways to talk to a man it's a great ebook to keep on your phone loads of scripts
for every type of situation you can probably possibly get into including the one where if
you have to pass on a man you say you've been great company I mean I'm gonna be moving on you
can use any combination of these things such as you've been great company but I don't feel like
we're on the same page so I'm gonna be moving on you let a guy down gently and I believe that this
gives you really positive energy that you carry into the next relationship as does he all right
everybody I hope these videos shed a little light on paying for dates or if you feel obligated to
pay for dates or if a man flat-out asks you to pay for a date you know it doesn't feel very sexy it
doesn't feel very romantic and it doesn't alright much love everybody give me thumbs up if you liked
this video and it's always comment below I love to hear from you paying for dates is something
that can make women get really divided and angry about and again this isn't something you're gonna
do forever but it is important to not let that man see you handle money you not pay for date
especially early on okay and how long is that I don't know it's up to you I believe up until about
date six or seven don't pay for anything and only pay for something that if you really really want
it like you would it yourself all right I hope this has been helpful and I'll see you next time