- THERE'S BIG NEWS IN LOS ANGELES
THAT EVERYBODY IS TALKING ABOUT.
IT'S NOT THAT IT'S A BILLION DEGREES HERE.
IT'S THAT THERE'S A BRAND-NEW DUNKIN' DONUTS.
THERE'S NEVER BEEN ONE IN LOS ANGELES,
AND PEOPLE ARE VERY EXCITED.
NOW, LOOK, I LOVE A DOUGHNUT AS MUCH AS THE NEXT GAL,
BUT PEOPLE ARE LOSING THEIR MINDS,
AND IT GAVE ME AN IDEA.
I SENT AN AUDIENCE MEMBER THERE TO ACT LIKE A CASHIER.
WE PUT HIDDEN CAMERAS IN THERE.
HE HAS AN EARPIECE, AND HE HAS TO SAY
EVERYTHING I TELL HIM TO SAY.
HE IS PRETENDING TO BE A CASHIER.
SAUL, IF YOU CAN HEAR ME,
I WANT YOU TO WHISPER "MUNCHKIN."
- MUNCHKIN. - OKAY.
SO YOU CAN GREET THE NEXT-- THE FIRST CUSTOMER.
CAN I HELP THE NEXT CUSTOMER?
- CAN I HELP THE NEXT CUSTOMER?
- THANKS A LOT. YEAH, HEY.
- WELCOME TO DUNKIN' DONUTS.
- A DOZEN-- - WELCOME TO DUNKIN' DONUTS.
- THANK YOU.
- WE PUT THE DUNK IN DONUTS.
WHAT CAN I GET YOU?
- WE PUT THE DUNK IN DONUTS. - OKAY.
- WHAT CAN I GET YOU?
- I JUST WANT TWO MUNCHKINS. - HOW 'BOUT THIS HEAT?
- CAN I DO THAT? - HOW 'BOUT THIS HEAT?
- IT'S HOT. IT REALLY IS. MELTING--I'M MELTING.
- YEAH, I DON'T HAVE AIR CONDITIONING.
I DON'T HAVE AIR CONDITIONING.
- I DON'T HAVE AIR CONDITIONING.
- SO I'M SO HAPPY TO BE HERE. - I'M HAPPY TO BE HERE.
- CAN I GET TWO MUNCHKINS, OR DO I HAVE TO BUY--
- OOH, IT IS SO HOT IN HERE.
- IT IS SO HOT IN HERE. - IT IS?
- YEAH. - YEAH.
- CAN I START ORDERING NOW?
- YES, DESCRIBE WHAT YOU WANT.
- YES, YES. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE?
- WE'RE GONNA GET FOUR BOSTON KREMES.
- CAN YOU DESCRIBE THE BOSTON KREME TO ME?
- CAN YOU DESCRIBE WHAT YOU WANT?
- YEAH. LOTS OF CHOCOLATE.
- YES, GO ON. - YES, GO ON.
- WHERE'S YOUR BOX? - OH, LET ME GET A BOX.
- LET ME GET A BOX. LET ME GET A BOX.
- OKAY, OKAY. WHY DO YOU LIKE THE BOX?
- FOUR BOSTON KREME.
- HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM?
- ROUND, PLEASE.
[laughter]
- OKAY, PUT THEM IN THERE, SAUL. PUT THEM IN THERE.
- TOP RIGHT. TOP RIGHT. OH, OR THOSE.
- PUT ONE OF EACH, OF EVERY ONE, IN THERE.
GRAB ONE OF EACH OF EVERYTHING.
JUST--YEP.
- I THINK YOU'RE GETTING--
YOU'RE GETTING ONE OF EVERYTHING.
- NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. - ALL RIGHT.
- YOU KNOW, WE CAN TRY A VARIETY.
THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT. - HE'S JUST DOING WHAT HE WANTS.
- VARIETY IS THE SPICE OF LIFE.
- SO HERE YOU GO.
- MORE CHOCOLATE, MORE CHOCOLATE.
- OKAY, PUT SOME MORE CHOCOLATE IN THERE.
- HERE YOU GO.
OH, MORE CHOCOLATE, MORE CHOCOLATE.
- HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A DUNKIN' DONUTS BEFORE,
OR IS THIS YOUR FIRST ONE?
- I GUESS I DON'T NEED ANY MUNCHKINS.
- HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A DUNKIN' DONUTS BEFORE,
OR IS THIS YOUR FIRST ONE?
- WE'RE BOTH FROM THE EAST COAST, SO...
- SO YOU'VE BEEN-- - WE'VE BEEN TO DUNKIN' DONUTS.
- WHICH ONE HAVE YOU BEEN TO?
- SO YOU'VE BEEN TO DUNKIN' DONUTS BEFORE?
WHICH ONE HAVE YOU BEEN TO?
- LIKE, BOSTON. - WHICH ONE?
- WAS TIM THERE? - HAMPTON, MASSACHUSETTS.
- WHAT'S FUN THERE? - IN MASSACHUSETTS?
[laughter]
IN MASSACHUSETTS?
IT'S--IT'S LIKE THIS WEATHER IN THE SUMMER,
AND THEN IN THE WINTER, IT'S LOTS OF SNOW.
- DO YOU WANT TO HEAR A JOKE?
- DO YOU WANT TO HEAR A JOKE? - YES.
- WHAT DID ONE DOUGHNUT SAY TO THE DOUGHNUT HE JUST MET?
- WHAT DID ONE DOUGHNUT SAY
TO THE DOUGHNUT HE JUST MET?
- I DON'T KNOW. - YOU DO-NUT KNOW ME.
[laughter]
- YOU DO NOT KNOW ME.
- YOU DO-NUT KNOW ME.
- YOU DO NOT KNOW ME.
YOU DO-NUT KNOW ME.
[laughter]
- GIVE THEM THE DOUGHNUTS.
GIVE THEM THE DOUGHNUTS.
THAT'LL BE 35¢.
- THAT'LL BE 35¢.
- BOOM.
[laughter]
REALLY? - 35¢, YES, SIR.
- 35¢, YEP.
- HOW DO WE DO THIS?
- I HAVE A 20.
- OKAY, I'LL JUST TAKE THAT THEN.
I'LL JUST TAKE THAT. - I'LL TAKE THAT.
- THANK YOU, BYE. - I'LL TAKE THAT.
- BYE. THANK YOU.
[laughter]
BYE.
- THIS CAN'T BE SERIOUS. - OKAY.
- NEXT, PLEASE. NEXT.
- NOW WHAT?
- NEXT, PLEASE.
NEXT.
- I'M PRETTY SURE ELLEN IS TELLING YOU SOME THINGS TO SAY.
- WHY DO YOU THINK THAT? - WHY DO YOU THINK THAT?
- 'CAUSE I WATCH "ELLEN" EVERY DAY.
I RECORD IT, AND I KNOW--
I KNOW HOW SHE WORKS. - YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
- ASK FOR A REWRITE.
[laughter]
- SAUL, TELL THEM WHAT JUST HAPPENED.
- SO, GUYS, YOU GUYS ARE ON "ELLEN."
- AND YOU ALL GET DOUGHNUTS. - IS IT REALLY?
- AND YOU ALL GET DOUGHNUTS.
- WHOO!
- THANKS, SAUL. THANKS FOR DOING THAT.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.