(upbeat music)
- Well,
obviously,
we have a rapist in Lincoln Park.
He's climbing in your windows.
He's snatching your people up,
trying to rape them so y'all need to hide your kids,
hide your wife,
and hide your husband because they raping anybody out here.
You don't have to come and confess that you did it.
We're looking for you.
We gon find you.
I'm letting you know now, so you can run and tell that,
home boy.
(audience laughing) - That's Antoine Dodson,
and he hates rape.
(audience clapping)
- (laughing) Woo they raping everybody.
They raping everybody.
(audience laughing) (Antoine laughing)
- How are you?
- (laughing) Hi.
- Daniel
- Hey what's going on?
- It's nice to meet you Antoine.
I invited you to this park.
Because while beautiful by day,
at night, there are more unsolved rapes per square acre
than any place in the entire United States.
(woman screaming) - Yeah.
Oh she's gonna be late.
Had I known you were going to wear your shit straight
I would have changed.
- Oh no but that is just so hot.
- You like it?
- I live for that.
- Now, where was that video?
- Uh.. The video was at Huntsville, Alabama in Lincoln park.
- How quickly did your life change after that?
- The situation happened, July 28th,
and August 1st,
the whole world knew us.
- What, what kind of offers were you getting?
- I was getting offers like uh...
"You come on the show, we'll give you $10,000
or you do this so we can give you 15,000.
Or if you sign this contract, we give you 14 million."
And I was like, I never understand that.
- I would have signed the one that said 14 million.
- I mean, I would've signed it too
If I hadn't went to school for business.
So I was like, well, you know,
we need lawyers and stuff like that.
- What do you want people to know about you?
- They know I'm openly gay.
That's mainly what I want to get out. I don't care
- That you're gay?
I think people knew that about one second into your videos.
- Nope, that, that is so stereotype.
- Of course it is. - I know a lot of,
I know a lot of feminine guys who's not gay.
- No you don't.
Tell me how the auto tune,
the news guys came to you to make a song.
- They came in with like a little 30 second
clip of the song and I listened to it and I was like,
"Is somebody trying to make fun of my family, like,
I hate this. This is such trash."
But listening to it after a while and over and over,
I'm like, "Wow it really does send a positive message.
It's like an alert."
- How much did you make off of it?
- Almost 300,000 copies or so.
And we were selling it at a dollar 29 so.
- Oh, that's the premium, the iTunes plus the dollar 29
- Hah hah.
- No 99 cents for your stuff.
- Mh mh.
- The only thing that I question is, "hide your husbands".
Are husbands really getting raped?
because I don't think so.
(Antoine laughs)
- Oh my God, husbands are really getting raped.
- They rape husbands in the South?
- They will rape your - That's why I don't go to
the South.
- If he is five foot two they is gon get him.
- All right, well, you kind of got caught
with your pants down last time.
Let's go learn how to be proactive, not,
- Reactive.
- I was going to say raped, but I liked yours better.
(Antoine and audience laughing)
(soft music)
- All right, Nancy, stop the stretching.
Stop the stretching right now. - I don't wanna pull anything.
- I don't wanna pull anything - You don't have time
to stretch in an alley when you're getting raped.
You're not going to stretch in my class.
Pull of hammy, that's on you.
So listen up.
First thing you need to know about being raped
is the worst thing you can possibly do when being raped
is yell, "Help, I'm being raped."
You wanna yell something like, "Help, I'm on fire."
Nobody wants to watch rape.
People love a good bonefire.
What would you yell and being raped?
- Free donuts.
You come in here, sir.
This is Greg.
He's going to try to rape you.
- How is he going to rape anybody with all that stuff on?
- We're gonna use our imagination on this, all right?
Three options.
Eyes, throat, testicles.
Antoine, get up here. - Mess him up, mess him up,
mess him up, mess him up.
- All right, that's enough.
That's enough, you got his balls.
- Fire.
Fire.
- Everyone, go ahead right now,
and let's blow our rape whistle on the count of three.
One, two, three.
(whistles blowing)
(audience laughing)
- They were out of regular rape whistles.
All right, Antoine, you were clearly the greatest
rape fighting machine I have ever come across.
We've learned all weekend from this crazy lady.
The world wants to know,
are you ready to give it another shot?
- I'm ready let's go.
- Let's go find us a rapist.
Antoine, there is only one proven way to catch a rapist.
And that's with the rape trap.
- Cool. - Yeah.
Now all we need is some rape bait.
- Where we gon find a rape bait?
- Well, at this hour, we'll have to improvise.
♪ He's climbing your window ♪
- Oh, I'm all alone.
Sure, glad I don't have any pepper spray on me.
My shoes aren't tied.
- Somebody coming, act sexy, act it out.
- Hey buddy, no means yes.
Why don't you pour your DNA right here.
Want one of this?
- Don't worry about that's a girl, that's fish.
- Beat it slut,
go get raped in your own corner.
Maybe I should take my sleeping pills.
Rihiffnol, rape drug.
♪ He's climbing your window. ♪
♪ He's snatching your people. ♪
- This one looks promising.
We gon find you.
(man screaming)
- Oh, ah, I'm being raped by a homeless beggar.
- Ah (laughs)
ah, we caught the rapists y'all uh... need to add your kids,
Hide your wife, or hide your husbands.
Cause they ain't raping nobody else out here.
(Antoine laughing loudly)
- I'm still being raped by a homeless beggar.
(audience cheering)
(upbeat music)
(audience clapping and cheering)
- Thank you.
Thank you.
Hey girls.
Welcome
to Daniel
point O,
the sunny side of Tosh.
Let's laugh, learn and love.
Now I'm going to dance like five minutes
to straight up kill time.
(upbeat music)
All right.
Right now, please welcome the human rape whistle himself.
Hide your kids.
Hide your wife.
It's Antoine Dodson.
(upbeat music)
How has your life changed since being on my show?
- A whole lot
I have a girlfriend.
- That is very confusing.
What's his name?
(Antoine laughing)
- You were gay.
You are no longer gay.
- People don't even understand how
this quote on quote straight thing came along.
It was a little thing that happened with this girl and
the hell, I fell in love with her, so,
and now we have a baby.
- So you're really only straight for one woman.
- Exactly.
- That's my problem.
I'm just straight for too many women.
Have you told your family that you are back in the closet?
- Oh, when I told my family I was back in the closet,
they kind of believed it.
- They did?
- They did. So I feel like I just dropped the act.
- It was just an act?
- Yeah, I take it as an act.
- You were so good at it though.
So you have no thoughts at all of men in a sexual way?
- You can never forget your past, you know what I'm saying?
You gonna always have those memories and things.
And I'm not saying that I don't think about it because I do.
- But if you see a gorgeous man, what goes on up there?
- I'm like, "Oh, he's handsome. He's decent."
A couple of other things which you know...
- (beep) is great isn't it?
- It is, it's warm.
- Very warm.
Who's your celebrity crush?
- My crush has to be Halley Berry.
She is hot in real life.
- But so old.
- You know that thing aint old.
- It's just as old.
(both laughing)
(upbeat music)
- And how (beep) dare anyone out there make fun of Brittany
after all she's been through?
All you people care about is,
your readers and making money off of her.
She's a human!
(audience laughs)
Leave Brittany alone.
(audience laughs)
- Chris.
- Hi.
- Tina,
- Tine, whatever.
- Nice to meet you.
- Hey, listen, we have a great place to do an interview.
- Okay. - I set it up.
I think it will make us both feel very much,
at home, - Somewhere more private,
- Yeah very private, - Okay.
- Kind of like a slumber party
Girls night!
Tell me how your life changed after that video.
- One morning, I grabbed my lab camera
as I always do when I'm really mad.
And I just filmed it in front of
my window with my curtains behind me, and...
- So you're telling me that you filmed it
under your curtains?
- A lot of people think I've,
- Wait, well then what the hell am I doing
with this (beep) sheet?
You really think Brittany wants to be left alone?
- No.
- So it was just in the moment,
It wasn't fake though?
- No, it wasn't.
- Does the carpet match the (whistle)?
- Uh... I have leukemia uh... pubes.
So, there's none there.
- Got you. - yeah.
- Uh... What do you think of Heidi and Spencer?
- Heidi is a role model of mine,
um... You know, she is the new what is it?
(beep)
- Oh. - Mother Teresa
- Maybe if you were a little more masculine,
it would be a little more intimidating
when you're telling people to leave someone alone.
But, watch it up a little bit.
- Leave Brittany alone.
Like that?
- Well, no, no, that was terrifying.
Not a lot of people have left Brittany alone.
I actually invited over a famous paparazzo, I know
but I think it's good.
I think you face your demons, talk to them.
This person is very famous for not leaving Brittany alone.
Come on in buddy.
Darnel was the one that actually took the picture
when Brittany was freaking out with the umbrella.
- Oh, okay. - Yeah.
- He's the one that exposed
when she was going through a hard time.
- Yes.
- I'm so excited.
- Well, do,
Is there something that you want to tell him?
- There's not much I wanna tell him,
but there's a lot I wanna do to him
- Okay. Well, not, not in my happy tent.
Darnel, do you promise not to take
any more photos of Brittany?
- He better promise
- No.
- Leave her alone,
- Okay,
okay guys. - right now.
- This was a bad idea.
- What are you doing?
- That's okay, that's okay.
That's actually, that's actually good for my show.
It's only good for your show.
- I know, but I need the publicity.
God, it's been a slow start.
Okay, Christine, you need to find someone new.
- You're right.
- I brought you some wardrobe.
- The shirt.
- Yeah, do you mind putting that back on?
- I don't mind, I'm going to need this.
- Okay.
- But I'm also, I'm going to need some privacy.
- Okay, why?
Well, the world wants to know
Chris, are you ready to give it another shot?
- I'm ready.
Leave Brittany alone.
Leave her alone.
So I know who American needs to leave alone now.
- Hand me my bat.
- And that is Kate Gosselin.
Leave Kate alone right now.
If you don't leave her alone, you're gonna have to...
(audience laughing and clapping)
- Okay,
What you have all watched is the first televised snuff film.
And like most internet snuff videos,
you secretly hope it's real.
But it wasn't, it was fake.
Chris is a good sport and is standing over there, Chris
(audience cheering and clapping)
Thank you Chris,
take a bow.
Or a curtsy.
(upbeat music)
Our next guest is arguably our most famous redemption.
He looks a little different than the first time we saw him.
It's Chris Crocker.
How are you buddy?
- Good, how are you?
- Have a seat.
Before we begin I want you to know
that you are by far and away,
my most favorite web redemption that I've ever shot.
- Really?
- The last time I saw you,
you were definitely channeling more your feminine side.
- I was gonna get breast implants.
The last time you seen me.
And I was like, "Before I commit to that,
I want to see if I like living as a guy first,
before I just make that permanent."
- I don't know if I'm late to the game
but are you telling me that you're gay?
- I think you know that.
- What have you been up to you?
- I've done a lot.
I've been doubling in music.
I did a porn.
- So you're in film.
- I'm in film.
So the porn happened
because I was in a relationship for three years.
I wanted to buy a house.
I was like "I'm not gonna make Chris Crocker money forever."
What ever the (beep) Chris Cocker money is.
So I was like, let's do a porn.
- We actually have a scene from it right now,
let's take a look.
- Is it actually showing a clip?
All these girls, these chicks,
Kim Kardashians, Paris Hilton.
They pretended it was leaked.
But because I owned it, that's one reason I wanted to do.
I was like, you know what?
If I'm going to do this
and let the world see me get screwed,
I'm going to say I did a porn.
- Horrible double standard, is your asshole bleached?
- It's not, but it should have been for the porn.
But I'm not a bottom.
I always say don't be fooled
by the limp wrist because my Dick ain't limp.
So I'm a top America just so you know,
- I think that it's good that we get that out there.
Dude, what happened to your chair?
(audience laughing)
(upbeat music)
- That food, food line lay weird it.
I says some short central bit it,
kratata!
Swag bitch.
I'm a real (beep) for life.
Run up on me, don't sing to the sky (beep).
Krratata!
(upbeat music)
Swear to God, a legend.
Take your bitch in here with the, krata!
Yeah he's mad?
Yeah. You mad.
Cause I'm god (beep)
kratatata!
(soft upbeat music)
- Bryan player.
- What's good bro?
- I wasn't gonna recognize you without the bathroom.
This (beep) is nice.
- You know how I roll, slide couch.
It's a little bubbly.
- That's good.
Now this ain't no food food lame (beep)
- Swag bitch.
- So who is Bryan Silver?
- Bryan silver is mainly someone who
came about when I mainly first got introduced to the block.
- Florida's where you, where you got your street cred?
- Honestly, I got my street credit in everywhere I go.
My mom told me when I was growing up,
"Bryan, sooner or later,
people will respect you for being a real ass (beep).
- That's what your mother said?
- That's what my mother told me.
- Oh that sweet woman.
- Real recognize real,
when another real (beep) sees another real (beep),
you just know.
- Now,
not a lot of white people
are allowed to use the N word.
How did you get your black cred?
- Ever since I was eight years old, I've been allowed to,
like literally, my (beep) were on the block,
flocked around in the truck, you know what I mean?
Strides with 38 group rocks in my socks.
- You got your nipples are small.
- I don't really look at my nipples like that.
- I'm just saying, I'm saying like the circumference
of the area yours are on aren't very large.
That's okay though.
- Honestly, I'm lucky to make it past 16.
If I didn't get locked up for three years.
- Why did you get put in juvie in the first place?
- It just all adds up, right now, I got 14 felonies.
- Well, we're glad to have you here.
- Me too (laughs)
- Tell me the story of your tattoo
- It's straight gang related.
- Okay.
- Only God can judge us out,
because once you've been through so many
difficult times in your life, to where,
the only person you had to look up to was yourself,
then you start looking at yourself as a god.
- So when you say only God can judge,
only you can judge?
- Exactly.
- I got no code.
That means do not resuscitate.
Just let me die.
- (beep) done.
Put the Mac to your head.
Then you go home.
- I'm not afraid to go.
- Right so you gotta be TTG trying to go.
You know what I mean?
It's like, yeah.
- How many videos have you made?
- I don't even know.
It's been countless videos though.
- You feel the internet has disrespected you at all?
- No, I run the (beep) internet.
The, my whole plan is to do
is to take over everything.
- Like Jay Z?
- Not like that.
- Okay. - Jay Z is a fufu ass Lang.
- Okay.
- I rock with film.
- Can I ask, did the gay porn, did it pay well or no?
- Honestly that (beep) was the lame.
Slapping that (beep) like a Slurpee.
- What do you think of this season of Louie?
Are you liking the show at all or no?
- (beep) is that?
- It's a TV show on FX.
- No, I never seen it.
- I need to learn the diddy bop
because I'm not doing it properly.
I mean, I do a little
- What you gotta do is you got to hold up your feet like.
- Okay, didn't see this coming.
Scott, the cooking cooking is just a little bit.
- Put in your microwave, let it cook.
- So, microwave? Why is the microwave so high?
Microwave is up here.
- I don't like that.
I like a microwave right here.
- I sent some shots at you been it,
kratata!
- How'd you come up with, krratata!
- See, I mean, you gotta think about it when it
when a gun spitting it's so, kratata! Krratata!
- I've never shot a gun.
So don't tell anybody in the streets that
bop! bop! Bop!
- Or, kratata!
- Bop!
- Krratata!
- Kratata!
- What's your second favorite onomatopoeia?
Is it like potatoes obratata?.
- I don't know (beep) what that is.
- Hey Bryan I brought you and your little friend a snack.
- Excellent, you put it right there.
- God damn Bryan, I didn't know you had shrimp,
you're fancy as (beep).
- You know how I roll bro,
that's swag bitch.
- That's a 40 count.
Just get a couple of selfies.
Lets take one while flexing.
Let me feel your muscle.
Oh, you're hard as a rock.
Feel mine.
- Flexy.
- It's not, it tickles.
- Kra!
- Kr... I like that.
I like that.
It's actually beautiful to watch.
Well, Bryan, thanks for inviting me on the yatchatta.
I know you've only been on it for an hour
and you've allowed 40 minutes for vines and selfies,
so I'ma get going.
I'll see you later, buddy.
- Thanks for coming.
(upbeat music)
- Unfortunately, Brian, couldn't be with us in person
because he is in jail.
For misdemeanor assault, shoplifting
contempt of court, felony, possession of a firearm,
abduction by force and intimidation.
Sounds like somebody's been a busy little bee.
So waste is one phone call on us,
please welcome prisoner number four three one eight seven
Brian, Krratata
Silva.
How you doing buddy?
- [Brian] Am on top, bro.
- How does it feel to be in the hall of fame?
- [Brian] Amazing, but at the same time I'm like,
"(beep) the fame I just want the checks"
Brian, you sound like a horrible person.
All right, congratatas.
You'll be happy to know that instead of a jacket
we're shipping you a green screen jumpsuit.
(upbeat music)
- I love women.
We're such planners.
Like right now as you guys sit there, relax,
and in front of the TV
wondering what she's making you for dinner,
your wives are racking up community debt
transferring money into a separate bank account.
Finally losing that baby weight after nine years,
and hooking up with your son's baseball coaches on Facebook.
What's the one thing a man needs when he's blindsided
by a long planned divorce, a great female attorney.
I men's rights attorney Marilyn York.
And I represent men in all family law matters.
(upbeat music)
- I'm asking if you made out with my sister last night.
- You mean sister in law,
It's your brother's wife.
It's not that weird.
It's just like normal cheating.
And you got over that the six times you know about.
- How could you do this to me?
- You're being crazy.
Are you on your period?
- You mother (beep)
- Okay, like a good lawyer Marilyn is there.
- Bitch I need a few moments with my client
(man screaming)
- Before we begin.
Is this conversation protected
under attorney, client privilege?
- I'm thinking not just because we're being filmed
and you're going to go ahead and air it.
So tell him to go off mic, and then we can,
if you need some private time.
- I will go forward.
Where are you from?
- From San Jose, California.
But I grew up in Reno, Nevada, biggest little city,
marriage capital of the world.
- Is it the marriage capital?
- I think Vegas probably stole it.
Still the divorce capital of the world though is Nevada.
- Why is that?
- We have no waiting period like California.
So you can get divorced like (snaps fingers)
And for me three divorces, two hours.
- Do you ever defend women?
- Not on purpose, but we take them by referral
and someone has to vouch.
They're not like the animal kingdom
"eat your young" kind of psycho women.
And they usually lie.
- Do you feel like you that you've abandoned your uh...
- My people?
- Your people.
- They're not my people, they're evil.
And divorce, it brings out the worst in women.
We're like insecure naturally, gold digging,
money grabbing over protective of the kids.
Like "he cheated on me."
It's not cheating if you've closed shop for like two years,
like you never went down on your husband.
It's not cheating.
Right? - I think it's still cheating.
I think it's still cheating.
- No, that's not my rule.
- Are you married?
- I am, I get married a lot.
- How many times?
- Four, just got my fourth wedding under my belt.
- So you believe in marriage?
- I'm good, I take the forever after is out of the vows,
so long as we're together,
I do pay all the bills and like
- Oh really so you're not even marrying up?
- No
Like you have your job.
You're smart.
You're successful.
I am too.
Don't tell me what the (beep) to do.
Don't ask what I did today
and don't tell me how to spend my money.
- You know their passwords?
- No.
I don't give a (beep)
- I like it personally, because it's like
"hey check, check that email," maybe
"email somebody for me."
- But you have like an assistant relationship.
I'm like, don't do (beep) for me.
Cause then I might owe you.
- Would you defend a trans man?
- Um... we have actually had one.
- Good
- And like gay on gay like girl or boy,
whoever wears the pants.
You make the money.
You have the job.
You boss her.
That's our girl.
That's our guy - you guys are tops
Yeah, we are tops, no bottoms.
- That's a, that's a good slogan.
Is "she got fat" grounds for divorce?
- When I was in LA, we did prenups
and some of the dudes made us put a fat clause in.
Where if she gained more than 25 lbs,
he was like "you get no money."
- Wait wait 25 lbs is that
a panel? - like 25 pounds.
- With with with no I understand what that stands for.
Hold on, let's bet.
Let's go back to the part where you didn't think
I understood lbs stood for panels.
- I was just a little worried.
- What if, what if they have a child?
- I said that and they're like
"I need some time for them to drop them."
- They said like six weeks
- Six weeks, that's,
that's incredible - it's stupid.
- I'd think six months.
- For me, it was three years of just being a chubby monkey.
Oh, it was hideous.
This is why I had to switch husbands.
- You might have to switch races.
- I might have.
What makes a good woman, a bad woman?
You tell me,
you're the one that can't watch the game in your own home.
- Do you write your own commercials?
- I do, that is the fourth version.
The ones you're looking at or like me after market testing
on men and them going,
"No, you can't say Academy and your ,
you can't say sexting.
You don't do balls, Marylyn.
Like I am trying to hold back.
Those are my good girl commercials.
- Do a lot of lawyers have a joke tab on their website?
- I would say no.
- Okay. So you're familiar.
This is on your website.
The biggest problem I have with this thing is
that women only have one leg.
- The biggest problem for me is your brain
on your penis is way too large.
Like shrink it down, shrink it down.
And then we're good.
- The female brain, driving skills.
I get it, haha the joke.
You guys don't drive as well.
Do you see how small our sex initiator gland is though?
- I think women want to have sex more than men.
What are your thoughts on that?
- I think you need your testosterone checked.
- What do you think about the new Ghostbusters movie
where they're redoing it with an all female cast?
- I'm comfortable with that
but those suits are super unflattering.
I hope they gave him a little nip tuck,
like a little tight like hot bitch kind of look.
- It's I don't, you don't know who's being cast?
- No. - That's like
a couple of big girls.
- I like anyone with thighs.
- Can women be funny?
The answer's yes.
- Yeah. - But can
attractive women be funny? That's the mystery.
Marylyn, you're doing God's work
but you're leaving money on the table.
It's time for you to be a trailblazer
and be the only lawyer who's going
after the real cancer in a marriage,
the children.
- When you got married, you made vows to each other
not some science experiment that slid out of your wife
- So instead of divorcing each other,
divorce the actual problem.
Your deadbeat offspring.
- At York,
- Tosh,
- and Matlock we'll beat your kids,
- in court.
(whoosh)
- Thanks to the eight year old crying
about the monster under his bed,
you have to keep your monster in your pants.
- They already destroyed your wife's tits,
now they're going to destroy your boner too?
- Oh this whining is exactly why we're divorcing you.
- Mommy?
- Stop calling me mommy.
It's Rebecca, now.
- Daddy.
- Jeff
- Say goodbye to wasting another Saturday,
standing around watching clumsy children,
trip over a soccer ball.
- And say hello to getting massages in Vegas.
- Do you hear that? That's right. Silence.
Thanks to York, Tosh, and Matlock,
I live in a clean quiet house.
God he was an ugly baby.
- Hey sport, forgot your basketball.
- And because of Obama and unfair child labor laws
it's impossible for kids to chip in
and carry their own weight.
- For the pricey cost cost to raise one kid,
you could have two land rovers,
a seven night trip to Paris,
two NFL season tickets in the lower bowl,
a fishing boat,
an extra pair of shoes every year,
a subscription to that Hulu no commercials plan,
and afford to add avocado to your sandwiches
for the rest of your life.
- We're at a restaurant
that doesn't offer crayons at the table.
I don't even remember our son's name
- At York, Tosh
- and Matlock,
we hate your kids even more than you do.
- Where the (beep) is Matlock
(whoosh)
(Latin voiceover)
(upbeat music)
- I literally left it blank.
- You didn't vote for president.
- I only did the judge races.
I was like "I can't."
- You sound like Mitch McConnell.
How soon will Donald and Melania get a divorce?
- I gotta see the prenup.
- Is Trump your dream client?
- Oh yeah, for sure.
I mean, except that he's hideous.
I like to look at a good looking dude like anyone else.
- I'd like to exercise my right as a man to talk over you.
- Good one.
- Are you going to take the vaccine?
- I'm not a big vaccine girl.
- So you won't take the vaccine.
- I probably won't take it no.
- Your body, your choice, for now.
(upbeat music)
- If you want to know how it feels to sit on an elephant,
surrounded by beautiful girls.
(girls laughing)
Yes, it feels great.
That is Yotta life.
(girls cheering)
- I spent a little time with Bastion Yotta,
and you may find there's some pretty super feelings
behind that Superman costume.
He's a businessman, a life coach, a fellow who says,
he and his wife came from Germany,
to fulfill dreams of their own, to reach greatness.
- Don't find yourself, create yourself.
You can create yourself to today.
A Superman and tomorrow is Batman.
And in three days as Mickey mouse, I want you to show, Hey
you can have a great lifestyle,
but with the value of the message.
You had can have fun.
- But some neighbors around here apparently
have some serious feelings about the Yottas.
This has been known as a party house in the past.
Sometimes rented by celebrities.
Some neighbors tell me
parties are poured out onto the streets.
- Everything is possible.
And if it's a dream you had as a little child,
it's never too, too late to make it come true.
(doorbell rings)
- Hi.
I'm Daniel.
I'd like to move in.
- Sorry buddy we don't accept male students.
(doorbell rings)
- Yes.
- Hi,
- Hi, I'm Danielle, I'm here to move in.
- Another beautiful lady wants to learn the Yotta life.
- Come in and join us.
- Thank you. - Let's go.
- My disguise is working.
Bastian and Maria, thank you,
for inviting me here.
- Welcome. - You're welcome.
- Where are you from?
- Born and raised in Germany, in Munich.
- Are you married?
- We are not married, but we realized
that if you name a girl, your girlfriend
it's nothing worse really, it has no value.
So we named her, I named her, my wife.
And so it's just to protect our relationship, but uh...
- I named her, my wife too.
- (laughs loudly) Yeah. That's good.
Yeah.
- Are you in an open relationship?
- No closed, so closed, yet virtual
- How, how's that work with so many beautiful women around?
- If you are, in a closed relationship
and you have the most beautiful wife in the world,
I don't care about other girls.
- All right, do people still want you out of here or?
Cause there's people complaining about the parties
and all this stuff.
- In the last four years he has received 96 calls to police,
- I heard about a complaints.
I never met a person in real who was complaining.
- Well that's because everybody in Los Angeles is fake,
are nice to your face. - Yeah.
- How many months have you been here?
Oh, we moved to LA December, 2014.
- What's the rent here?
- Uh... 35,000 a month.
Yeah. It must work hard for that.
- What, what, what do you do for a living?
Besides just being good looking?
- Well, thank you so much.
Yeah. I have a couple of companies.
So what I do, I make ideas happen.
- What's your net worth?
- My goal is to bring my networth
over 1 billion in the next two years.
- Next two years, over 1 billion.
- Yes.
- Explain to me what Yotta stands for.
- Yotta is the highest in the metric system.
It starts with Skylar.
1000 MEGA, ten to the power of six,
and yotta is the highest in the metric system.
What means uh... live your life at your fullest potential.
- I don't understand it at all.
Why don't you teach men?
- I don't want fat, ugly guys lying around.
- You don't have to, you don't have to point,
but I know what you're saying.
- I love to be surrounded by beautiful girls,
so it makes fun, we have fun.
- You like to be surrounded by beautiful girls?
- Yes, I love it,
so
- What's the clothing policy in the pool?
Is nudity encouraged?
- No Is we all way bikini.
- All wear bikini, yeah.
- Very tasteful.
- You have to always be classy, and
- Speaking of classy, a lot of the Instagram photos,
always like showing your butt.
- Do you know the story of the butt?
- No, - I'll tell you.
- I wanna hear the story of the butt.
- If we have been together for two weeks.
And we have been in the bedroom,
and she was dancing and showing me her body.
And I said, well, Maria, can you do me one favor?
please turn off the light because it looks so ugly.
And she was really like, "What?"
I said okay, I will show you something.
And it switched on all lights and made a pic of her butt.
- Why did your ass look so bad?
- She never worked out.
- Never
- Just do for four weeks what I'm telling you.
Eat clean, drink water, protein, workout,
and after four weeks we did the same pic.
- What's the best piece of advice
you can give someone who's trying to live the Yotta life.
- Three things, first,
what means your personal yotta life figured out,
create an on detailed version of your perfect life.
Second thing, make it happened and don't be afraid to fail.
Make yourself believe say it's possible, okay
- And the third thing, start now.
Now not tomorrow.
Not next week.
Not next, start now. Now.
- Yeah, I like to put things off.
- Danielle, are you ready to meet the yotta girls?
- Hello? Hi.
How are you?
- Oh, you're poking me, what is that?
- Sorry, that is my tampon it must be slipping out.
- Shooting women with my bow and arrow.
It's my favorite trust exercise.
- Oh woo... That didn't hurt,
because I don't have a penis, Maria.
- Danielle would be much prettier.
If she didn't have such a hairy face.
- Danielle, you want to have some sushi?
- I would love to
- But we did only the traditional way,
off six nude models.
- That is lovely, lets just get a little soy sauce here
and fill that up, there we go.
Do it all sabi, here we go and mix that up.
Hey, here we go.
- Well, I am absolutely not threatened by Danielle.
So I've seen the best and checked her out
but she has absolutely no ass she needs to work out.
- What's the best exercise I can do for a stronger pussy.
Because again, I'm a woman, not a guy.
- You must feel the pressure here, do you feel it?
- I do.
- Press harder.
- That's as hard as I can press.
- You can take a money bath.
- Okay if you need a real bath,
you should really consider switching to plastic.
- And now say out loud,
"I am a perfect woman."
- [Ladies] I am a perfect woman.
- Say it louder.
- [Ladies] I am a perfect woman.
- With a little training,
and a huge breast augmentation,
Danielle, can go on to do great things.
- Wow.
- What did I learn about Yotta life?
Well, it's almost definitely an excuse to trick some sevens
into thinking you're hot (beep),
and I couldn't be more down.
So I quit my job advice
and decided to remain at the Yotta mansion, forever.
(upbeat music)
- Hi, Danielle,
- Mr. Yotta, you haven't changed a bit,
God, you are beautiful.
- Where is your smoking hot super young wife Anney?
- Divorced, dead baby Yoda, Yoda, Yoda.
I hear you're a single man yourself these days.
What happened to you and Maria?
- We got separated,
- I'm sorry to hear about that.
- Well, everybody's happier.
So she is happy, I'm happy and that's all that matters here.
But we have been more like a team
more like brothers and sisters
- But brothers and sisters that you've had sex with.
- (laughs) yes, that's true.
- That is amazing.
- That's really amazing but uh... yeah.
- Did you ask for any of her implants back or no?
- She, you won't believe it,
she
reduced the size
of her breasts.
She made it smaller.
Can you imagine that?
- God damn! Do you want to be married?
- I do want yes, down the road definitely,
with the right one, yeah.
- And how young will the right one be?
- Guess, what is the age difference between my ex,
and my ex ex?
- Two years?
- No, 27,
- 27.
- So my ex was 19 and my ex ex was 46.
- And which one did you have better sexual chemistry with?
- It was the younger one, yeah.
- Yeah.
Yeah. 2018.
This is the year for you.
- Yeah.
- 2017, you had a few hardships.
- Well, in 2017, I had five attempts against my life.
- Like legitimate attempts? - Yeah.
Not just people online saying I wanna kill you?
- Oh no, no, no.
We had a home invasion where a knife attack
we had a shooting, somebody broke into the mansion
and brought poison snakes into my AC...
- They put poison snakes in your AC?
- And you know what?
The first time, I almost my pants,
the second time, you're scared,
the third time, you're just like, "Okay, who's next?"
And after five attempts, you say, okay.
- No one can kill me, I'm invincible.
- I feel like I said, yes exactly.
- Do you sleep with a gun under your pillow?
- No, my protection is my positive mind.
We have some security systems for sure.
Nobody knows where I do live now.
I keep it private.
- Malibu - So I'll just mention.
Yeah, (laughs).
- It sure was great catching up with you, bro.
See you at the 50th.
- Deal, I'll be there.
- (sighs) It's the coolest thing I've ever done.
(upbeat music)