Ohhh I can customize. Ah..
Jack: yeah, but just your face.
Mark: That's it?
I can do skin color.
Ho-ho! Luminescent. (Giggles)
Jack: Make him glow in the night!
In the moonlight!
Yeah, make him as white as I am.
Mark (softly): nice
Jack: Give him that Irish taint- tint.
Taint (giggles)
Mark: Give that Irish taint?
Bob & Wade: Irish taint
Jack: (thick Irish accent) An Irish taint
Bob: That hot Irish taint
Jack: It smells like bog water.
Jack: Ok who are we picking?
Mark: Yeah
Bob: Oh no, I still can't join. For fuck sakes.
Wade: (sarcastically) great choice, Bob.
Jack: Two holes, no pumps, sinking. Gah!
Mark: HAWT!
Mark: Hell yeah ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Wade: If I had a nickel for everytime I heard THAT in bed
Wade: If I had a nickel for everytime I heard THAT in bed
Mark: Two sweet holes... ( ͡O ͜ʖ ͡O) Bob:Yeah you gotta pump it
Bob (quietly):You really gotta work it...
Mark: Alright, wait...
Mark: Alright, wait... Jack: Okay, I have to equip things
Jack: Okay, I have to equip things
Jack: Ok, I se- Ah HA! Health beverage!
Jack: I want a health beverage!
Mark: The fuck is this shit?
Jack: You have to get into the game...
...and then press 'M' to confirm your load out?
What the fuck is this?
Bob: Yeah, it's in Alpha, okay?
Just calm down, clear your...
...Boot-jets™ (?)
Bob: Who- who's on what team?
Jack: I'm on pirates! :3
Jack: I'm on pirates! :3 Mark: I'm on a pirate ship
Mark: I'm on a pirate ship
Mark: It's really loud here...
Wade: I can't join the pirates...
Jack: Hey it's Bum-Bum :D
Jack: Hey! Mark: Heeey!
Mark: He- Uh oh... Bob: Wade, let's join the British!
Bob: Wade, let's join the British!
Bob: Wade, let's join the British, let's do it!
Wade: I just got into the Pirates...
Wade: I just got into the Pirates... Mark: I'm gon' shoot 'em!
Mark: With ma' gun!
Bob (dead): GOD FUCKING DAMN IT! Mark: With ma' gun!
Bob (dead): GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!
Jack: AH JESUS CHRIST! Mark: I- Woahohohohoho!
Mark: I- Woahohohohoho!
Wade: Are we all doing the U.S.S. Harbinger?
Mark: Hang on, wait, I'm gonna get a good shot on 'em!
Jack: Hey! I got someone!
Jack: Ahahaha!
Jack: Ahahaha! Mark: Aaaaannnnd...
Mark: Aaaaannnnd...
Mark: Boom!
Mark: Hehehehehe
Mark: I did it
Bob (dead): Oh sweet Jesus!
Bob (dead): Someone just killed me!
Mark: I hit Turd Furgeson, guys!
*Jack chuckling* Bob: Turd Furgeson killed me!
Bob: Turd Furgeson killed me!
Mark: Yeah!
Wade: Sure, that's a good loud out...
Jack: I'M ON FIRE! Wade: Sure, that's a good loud out...
*Mark expressing true concern for his friend*
Jack (dead): How did that even happen!? *Mark expressing true concern for his friend*
*Mark expressing true concern for his friend*
Jack: I NEED A HEALTH BEVERAGE!
Jack: I NEED A HEALTH BEVERAGE! Mark: Oh...
Mark: I'M ON FIRE!
Mark: I thought I was putting out the fire!
Wade: We're playing BLACKWAKE! Mark: I thought I was putting out the fire!
Wade: We're playing BLACKWAKE! Mark: But then things went bad...
Wade: ...And I'm locked into a dead end
*Mark enjoying his own cremation* Bob: We're fucking pirates and stuff!
*Mark enjoying his own cremation*
Jack (dead): I'm dead
Wade: Oh, Bob, are you a pirate now?
Mark: I'm trying to- Wade: OKAY that's a dead end, too!
Mark (dead): WELP Wade: OKAY that's a dead end, too!
Wade: OKAY that's a dead end, too!
Mark (dead): I think they're on the ship...
*Mark LAUGHS in the face of danger*
Jack: Yeah!
Mark: I think we've been "barded"
B: Oh my god
Jack: We've been "barded" Bob: Are we on fire?
Bob: Oh god our sails are on fire
Wade: Our captain was killed?! Bob: Oh, fucks sake
Mark: That's not good
J: Ya I just saw him die
Wade (dead): Aw, I'm dead too
Jack: Agh, agh
J: I'm killing Dunk
Mark:I'm on fire again guys...
*Laughs at Mark's pain and suffering*
Wade: Mark *giggles* Bob: Oh for fuck's sake!
*Mark's character screaming in agony*
Mark:Get shot b-ahh--I'm in the water now
Bob:The fuck is the-fuckin hole at? *Mark's character screaming once again*
Wade: How do I know who are pirates and who are...enemies?
Jack:The shirts! Shirts versus skins! Bob:So the British people...
Bob:The British people wear white and blue shirts and stuff and pirates wear like--
Bob: no shirts or like, pirate shirts
Jack:Dirty shirts Mark:Okay that--that's...really explains it
Mark:Hello
Wade:--to your friend CC-22243!
Mark:Noo! Not today! Jack:What the fuck! He put me on fire!
Mark:Ho...I was sho--you were shot in the head *laughs* Bob: if the boat is on fire you gotta put the boat out
Bob:Where's the Goddamn pumps?!
Mark:*giggles*
Jack:I don't know but I'm drinking my health potion, shut up!
*Wade laughs*
Jack:I'm dead!
*Mark laughs as his character burns*
Wade:Get away from me you flaming man!
Jack:Bob, what did you get us into?
Mark:Oh boy Bob:It's pirates! Just do pirate shit
Jack:Yeah I'm trying but there's a- Mark:I don't--
Jack:Boat fucking--(IDK?!) Wade:Gotta load a cannon, how do I load a cannon??
Mark:Who the hell is a good guy? Who the hell is a bad guy? Wade:That's not what I wanted to do!
Jack:Kill the white k-- Mark:That's gotta be a bad guy
Jack:Yeah kill the skinny(?) guys Mark: I'mma shoot him
Wade:I've been shot in the arse!
Jack:Nice! Mark:Alright, well, he's dead
Bob *laughs*
Bob *laughs*:Wade's dead now
Jack:Can we jump on their ship?
Mark:Yeah we can jump on their ship!
Wade:Bob is still like twice as loud as Jack
Wade:who is twice as loud as Mark
Mark:Hah?
Jack:You know what? That sounds like a you problem!
Mark:Yeah
Wade:Oh!
Mark:Ow! I was shot...
Mark:By Dunk
Jack:Did you get killed by Turd Furgeson?
Jack:Because that's the best guy you could get killed by Mark: No, Dunk got me
Wade:Your team!
Mark:We're on different teams *giggles* Wade
Wade:You guys went to the British?!
Mark:No, we're on pirates!
Wade:I'm on pirates, too!
Mark:Turd Furgeson is-- Wade:Turd Furgeson is wearing a gray shirt!
Mark:No, Turd Furgeson is on
Mark:The...uhhh...British side
Wade:Huh, that explains why I died near him, I guess
Bob:We're sinking because we're not pumping! Wade: How long does it take to load a gun?!
Mark:A long time (patiently waiting for his gun to finally load)
Bob:There's a lot of steps, it's pirate o'clock!
Bob:Oh fuck's sake! *Mark giggles* Wade:I killed someone! I killed someone!
Jack:Someone turn around with a box!
Wade:I killed acamparo(?)((Some other player?))
Mark:Acamparo? ((see, I'm not the only one!))
Bob:Uhh...I-I think that's, I think that's a dude
((Thanks Bob :3 ))
Jack:Wait Bob, you're shouting out orders, you're not even on our team
Bob:Yeah
Bob:I'm trying to help you
Jack:Yeah so stop yelling shit! Wade: Wait, Bob's on the other team?!
Jack:Yeah, so stop yelling shit at us! Mark:Owwwww....Jesus! Bob:OOHH, I fucking blew you up Mark!
Mark:I was just watching kindly from the background Bob *laughs*:He's just standing in the doorway!
Mark:I was just watching! I was having a good time!
*Bob laughs* Mark:You blew me up!
Wade:The boat's sinking Jack:The boat's gone
Mark:Oh...we win!
Bob:Oh hey, we're outta here bitches!
*Mark laughs*
Jack:What happened? Where are everything?
Mark:I dunno
Bob:We're leaving, that's "where are everything" Wade:What is this random music?
Mark:Yeah, there's a corpse just floating on our mast there?
Bob:It's fine Mark:I might be seeing things, too much grog
Mark:Well this guy's dead Wade:I'm driving apparently
Mark *laughs*:That's MY body! Oh okay...alright then
Bob:Are you the captain, Wade?
Wade:No
Bob:Oh
Jack:How do I--there's this..like
Jack:Damage signs up there
Jack:Oh you climb up those Bob:Oh, you have to climb up the outside of the--uhh
Bob:The..the riggings
Jack:Ohhh Mark:Oh, just like REAL PIRATES!
Wade:I know, but I'm not the captain! Jack:I feel like a---
Mark:Alright-- Wade:How do I talk in this game, how do I talk in-game?
Bob:Like the same as all the other ones probably? Mark:F, I think. F. Jack:I dunno, I turned it off cause I--
Bob:Oh no! Boat! Boat, come back!
Bob:Oh for fuck's sake Wade:I didn't get to be captain because it will not let me captain
Mark:Yeah, someone's captain Bob:Man overboard, you asshats!
Mark:Alright so this crow's nest is kinda bullshit, I can't see shit
*Bob and Wade laugh at Mark's struggle*
Mark:There's kind of a sail in my way
Bob:"Thar she blows," maybe? Mark: Welp, I'm dead now Wade:What is that?!
*Wade dying of laughter*
Wade *laughing*:Mark's dead body just fell right in front of me!
Mark:Don't mind me guys, I'm just trying to live a life here, just trying to live
Jack:Poosh! Mark:Oooooh, I want a Nockgun, holy shit!
*Mark laughs* Wade:We're south of the bringer
Jack:What are you doing? Mark:Oh man
Mark:I'mma get-oh Fuck, do you see the other guns in here?
Mark:The Duckfoot? The Matchlock Revolver? Holy crap Jack:Yeah, they're awesome! the Nockgun?
Mark:Oh my god! I'mma Duckfoot the shit out of you guys! Bob:Oh god, yeah the Nockgun is ridiculous
Jack:Oh the duckfoot is awesome!
Wade:Uh, how do you fire the front cannons?
Mark:I'm ramming this cannon, guys.
Wade:Is this even hitting me? Bob and Jack:Where are you?
Jack:I hit, I hit the sail!
Bob:The fuck are you guys? I don't understand-- *Jack repeating whatever his character just shouted*
Bob:I don't understand what's happen--oh hey! Mark:Where are they? Jack:Hey! I'm in my two! ((IDK??))
Mark:Alright Bob:Wa-Pew! Wade: *laughs*
Mark:Where are they? Jack:How do we change--
Jack:How do we change ammo?
Bob:Oh they're behind!
Bob:Rear guns!
Mark:Ooooooohh Bob:You guys are so fucked right now
Mark:Hehehe, are you guys? Jack:How do we change ammo??
Wade:Oh, you think we are? Jack:--thingies? Mark:You think we are?
Bob:I think you are and you are...
Wade:How is that a sail hit?! Jack:Oh!
Jack:I'm hitting your sails, bitch! Bob: The swivel--
Bob:The swivel guns are designed to hit the sails
Mark:Oh, HEY! Goddammit, get off my gun, this is my gun! Jack:So I can't change the ammo?
Bob:No, you can change the ammo in the main guns in the ship part Mark *singing*:LINING UP THE SHOOOOOO--
Mark *still singing*: OOOOOOOOT!!! Wade:I can't even see them anymore now I'm angry! Bob:Pew!
Bob:Oh we damaged the enemy ship! Good boys! Good BOY!
Mark *mocking Bob*: Good boys!
Jack:Oh, I wish I hit you, fuck!
Wade:We need to patch something up, how do we patch?
Jack:Did you kill them?
Bob:Mark, Mark shoot me!
*Mark laughs* Jack:Nice!
Mark:I'm gonna be okay... Wade:I'll eyeball--this is not a gun!
Wade:How do I get a gun? Mark:Woah!
Bob:Oh! I killed one of your bitch friends!
Mark:That guy got DESTROYED! Jack:Hey! Leave our friends alone!
*Bob laughs*
Mark:I just saw a shower of blood! That was nuts!
Mark:We're getting this nose, this nose is good!
Mark:This nose is ours. Jack:I know Bob:I wish we--
Bob:were on the same team, that'd be super fun ((aww, poor Bob :'( )) Jack:Dude, hammer my mast!
Mark:Oh, I'mma mast your hammer!
Mark:Oh fuck yeah
*Jack repeats whatever his character just said with a strong Irish accent*
Mark:We seem to be taking on water Wade:Is this another enemy ship?
Wade:Oh, it's a friendly ship! Jack:Yeah!
Wade:Oh! We're ramming a friend!
Bob:Oh, are you guys both pirates? Oh neat!
Jack:Um, we are sinking...VERY fast!
Jack:Oh God! Wade:Oh hey
Jack:Dude! Wade:Guys, I think we're underwater
*Bob laughs maniacally* Wade:Oh no!
*Bob continues his evil laugh* *Wade groaning* Jack:How do we--I don't know how to pump!
*Mark giggles* *Bob STILL laughing* *Wade shrieks*
Mark:Oh that is uh--okay, holes are--
Bob:I have a present for you!
Bob:My character just said "I have a present for you!" Mark:Holes are fixed!
Mark:Holes are fixed Bob:In a hilarious manner
Mark:Alright Jack:How do we-how do we pump?
Mark:Yeah, there's a pump in the middle! Bob:There should be little levers around
Bob:You have to go and pump on the pump levers
Mark:Yeah, we gotta... Wade:That's um, I thought the bottles were rum, that's not pumping
Mark:Yeah, we gotta fix the holes first and THEN pump, and THEN we're good
Bob:Boys, I need to go below decks! Jack:I'm ra-
Jack:I'm ramming this Mark:Whose boys are you talking about? Bob:Jack, you need to-
Mark:Our boys are doing better than your boys! Bob:Talking to my boys!
Jack:Oh Jesus, oh Jesus! Mark:Oh boy, oh boy, they're coming! Bob:Don't tell me how boys are doing
Mark:Hey
Bob:Oh ship sinks ((I think??)) You guys are right there! Mark:MY boys are the strongest boys
Bob:Ah! Mark:Ow! My face!
Bob:This is bad! Horrible things are happening!
Mark:I saw that cannonball coming! Jack:You could kill my doctor disappointment
Jack:I-I wanna do like a sniper shot, I wanna do like a fucking nose-scope or something
Jack:Fuck you guys up Bob:You gotta get the musket out, bro
Wade:Our ship's sinking again Jack:Yeah, that's what I have
Jack:I know how to pirate, okay?
Jack:Our stuff is all ready to go, but we're not lined up
Mark:Wade, there's something else behind us, what is this?
Mark:BOINK
Jack:THE PIRATES WIN! *Mark cheers* Wade:YEAH! Bob:The pirates win?!
Wade:We earned this!
Mark:We did it guys!
Jack:We knew EXACTLY what we were doing!
Jack:Turd Furgeson!
Mark:Best gunner! Jack:My man!
Jack:Hey, look at us!
Wade:I was ranked #121
Jack:I was 109 and 26 Mark:Ah
Jack:I was 109 and 26
Mark:I was 122
Bob:Pirates! Join pirates! Try and join pirates!
Mark:K, trying to join pirates Jack:I did!
Jack:OH, MOTHERFUCKERSHIP!
Bob:Oh, we gotta join motherfuckership!
Mark:Motherfucker Wade:Alright
Jack:Yeah! Mark:Oh hell yeah!
Bob:You gotta join the motherfucker ship
Bob:You gotta join the motherfucker ship Jack:Fuck yeah
Mark:We're all in!
Jack:We're all in
Wade:YEAH! Bob:Yay!
Mark:Oh hell yeah!
Jack:Bob, I need to turn you down a bit
Mark:I don't wanna be captain, somebody else be captain
Mark:I ain't about that Bob:No, don't nominate yourself to be captain
Bob:"I'm-a-motofoko"((IDK?)) wants to be captain
Bob:Go figure
Jack *laughs*: "Im-a-motofoko"
Bob:Alright, load all the cannons, motherfuckers
Bob:of the Motherfuckership
Jack:Ahhh, now we know what to do
Bob:Of the great ship, Motherfucker
Mark:Oh, fuck me ass!
Mark:Oh, da goochy bury mah cockener!
Mark:Ohoho, fuck me in the ass Bob:Oh my god, it's so fucking dark
Bob:Oh my god, it's so fucking dark, I can't even see what's happening
Bob:I hope this is not the entire round!
Mark *gritted teeth*:Oh the Motherfuckers gonna fuck ya!
Mark *gritted teeth*:Oh the Motherfuckers gonna fuck ya! Bob:Oh yes
Bob:Just gonna fuck your father
Mark:I'mma fuck everybody!
Bob:It's not an apply neighbor, okay?
Jack:LOAD THE CANNONS MEN!
Mark:These are small cannons! Bob:Load the cannons you scurvy dogs!
Bob:Load the cannons you scurvy dogs!
Mark *chuckles*:These are small cannons
Jack:Load the cannons you cunts!
Mark:Why are we a tiny ship?
Mark:Why are we a tiny ship? Wade:Wow!
Bob:Wow!
Mark:Why didn't we get the big ship guys?
Bob:Wow Mark:I got a-
Mark:I got a bad feeling about this
Bob:Wow
Jack:Oh guerrilla'd? ((I think??))
Jack:I love this so much
Bob:Better for you to do-- Wade:OH DAIDEE, DAIDEE
Wade:Wait, that's not pirate-ish
Wade:DAIDEE, DAIDEE, DAIDEE Jack:DAIDEE, DAIDEE, DAIDEE
*Mark joins in*
Mark *singing*: I once sailed the ocean
Bob:Off the front left!
Bob:People off the front left!
Wade:I thought Bob was adding to the song! Jack *laughing*:That's the part of the song Mark:That's not how it goes xD
Jack *singing*:Off the front left!
Bob *singing*:And then I killed a hooker
Bob:What are we singing?
Mark:I'm ready! Jack:I'm ready to fuck!
Mark:AAAND FIRE! Jack:Ready to fuck people with this cockfuck!
Mark:Oh, there's a delay guys... Bob:Oh yeah! I hit and damaged the enemy's ship!
Bob:If they start boarding us, uh..get your guns and shit out
Bob:and fight them
Wade:Well, I'm reloading as fast as I can Jack:Yeah, do it Mark:Right
Wade:Well, I'm reloading as fast as I can Jack:I'm ready to Duckfoot! Mark:Right
Bob:Oh they're getting ready! Jack:Oh, I had a clear shot, captain!
Jack:Oh, I had a clear shot, captain! Mark:Oh god! It's the U.S.S. Trump guys!
Mark:We're boned! Jack:Oh no!
Jack:Oh no! Bob:Oh we're so fucked!
Mark:We're fucked guys Jack:It's gonna be impenetrable!
Wade:How did I miss it? It's gonna be huge!
Bob:Actually, it's uhh..It's got tiny hands
Bob:So it's easier to miss
Bob:Trump jokes, okay? Trump jokes! #Nailed it
Bob:#Tiny hands
Jack:Where are we fucking facing? Where's the enemies?
Wade:I don't know!
Bob:Fire off the right side!
Mark:Uhh, what side's the right side?? Jack:Oh fuckit, firing captain!!
Mark:Uhh, what side's the right side?? Jack:OH WE HIT EM!
Mark:I'll reload
Bob:Mark, I wasn't using nautical terms, the right side is
Bob:Mark, I wasn't using nautical terms, the right side is still just the right side
Bob:Even though we're on a boat
Bob *mocking Mark*:Which one's the right one? What does right mean?!
Jack:Well sometimes you gotta- Bob:Do any of you idiots fucking reload the cannons out here?
Bob:What the hell are you doing?
Mark:I'm trying! Jack:WE FUCKING ARE!
Jack:SHUT UP!
Mark *sulking*:I'm trying
Mark:Don't yell at me!
*Mark sobbing* Bob:PIRATE HARDER
Mark:I really need-- Jack:PIRATE BETTER!
Wade:I don't wanna ram it at all!!
Mark:I NEED POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT RIGHT NOW
Mark:I feel like this is a hostile work environment
Jack:SHUT UP!
Bob:Mark, you're a cute little snowflake and you can do it buddy
Mark:Thank youuuuuu Bob: So good job, okay?
Mark:I feel better now
Bob:Load that shit
Bob:Alright, right side
Bob:Oh no, left side coming up!
Bob:Oh no, left side coming up! Mark:Uh-Oh
Bob:Well we're gonna fucking ram these guys
Bob:Oh no, right side coming up Mark:Alright, apparently--
Mark:They're sinking good!
Mark:Here we go! Bob:Full broadside, boys!
Mark:AAAAAAND
Mark:Firing!
Mark:Ooooooooh
Mark:Shaboosky! Bob:Fire!
Mark:I hit 'em!
Jack:Haha! Bob:I hit them!
Bob:I hit them! Mark:Getting powder in there
Jack:How did they fucking miss point-blank??
Bob:Yeah, how did I not get a hit for that?
Bob:I don't understand
Mark:Yeah, I thought I got a hit for that!
Wade:I don't know
Mark:OW! My face got pushed in
Mark:OW! My face got pushed in Bob:Oh god!
Wade:One hole! Bob:We need re-supplies!
Bob:We need re-supplies!
Mark:Hang on, I'm trying
Jack:I'm busy lighting shit and fucking firing cannons
Bob:How am I not--
Mark:Where's the hole?
Jack:I don't get that
Jack:I'm not getting hits
Mark:Ow Wade:I dunno where the hole is
Mark:Apparently I bled to death Jack:Their ship is fucking sinking faster than your mother!
Jack:Their ship is fucking sinking faster than your mother!
Mark:My wha-?? Wade:My mother's sinking?
Mark:Why is my mom sinking? MOM!
Jack:She's going down on my dick!
Mark:What??
Bob:Woah
Jack:I'm sorry lads
Jack:The sea, it gets to me
Jack:She speaks to me and tells me what to say
Mark:Guys, I'm on their ship, I got a broken bottle, I'm ready for action
Bob:Fucking get them!
Mark:I don't think anybody's alive on this ship!
Jack: The HMS Cancer! Bob:Yay! We destroyed them!
Mark:Guys, I'm trapped on this ship!
Mark:I died, okay...
M:Alright... Bob:Mark!
Wade:YOU WERE ON THE ENEMY'S SHIP?
Mark:I was on that ship as it went down guys!
Bob:Byeee
Bob:Keep pumping Jack Jack:FIX THE FUCKING HOLES!
Wade:Why were you on the wrong ship?? Jack:Jesus Christ!
Bob:It's a tiny boat, we're fine!
Mark:I was trying to fi--
Mark:WHERE'S THE HOLE?!
Jack:As crazy as this is, it's actually really fun
Mark:Yeah no, this is awesome! Bob:Yeah, I know right?
Bob:It's like we're actually pirates!
Mark:Arrgh Yarrr!
Mark:Is that an enemy over there?
Bob:Ranging from anywhere from 40-50 frames per second! Jack:Did we hit them?
Bob:Ranging from anywhere from 40-50 frames per second! Jack:AYY I HIT THEM!
Jack:We can hit them! Quick! Fire off the rightside!
Bob:"Right side" right side?
Jack:Yeah, we're fucking them up! Wade:Need some powder!
Mark:Alright, whooo hey
*Wade Screams*
Wade:BOOPER DOOPER YOU CAN'T HAVE ALL THE CANNONS!!
Jack:YOU'RE SLOW AS FUCK! Mark:Alright, I'm gonna try to board them!
Bob:We're immobilized! We gotta fix the nose!
Bob:We're immobilized! We gotta fix the nose! Mark:Woah! I hit somebody!
Bob:The nose is fucked!
Jack:You fucked that dude up!!
Mark:Apparently, take my Duckfoot--oh boy! Bob:Guys!
Bob:Guys, help me fix the nose!
Wade:I got hit with a cannon!
Mark:I'm going over there--ow!
Mark:I'm going over!!
Jack:Did you duckfoo--! *laughs*
Mark:I'm over there!
Jack:Dude, get back here!
Mark:No! I'm gonna kill em!
Mark:Don't worry guys, I got this Jack:Really? It doesn't look like you're killing them
Jack:Really? It doesn't look like you're killing them Wade:I really love pain...
Wade:OOAGHH
Bob:Wade you really gotta kill those guys
Bob:You really gotta get those
Mark:Have a grenade, sir!
Mark:You want a grenade? Here you go, right by your feet
Jack:Don't hit me..YES!!
Bob:I just solo'd ((something)) you're all welcome Wade:What are you doing??
Bob:Mark, are you sinking with the enemy's ship again?
Mark:Yeah, I died over there
Jack:Did you just say you s--
Bob:Does anyone else fix shit on this boat?
Mark:I got-I'm getting to--Bob, we're on it!! Wade:We're trying, I died!!
*Jack chuckles*
Mark:We got--I went over there and I threw a grenade at the captain's feet and then the ship went down
*Laughs at Mark's failure*
Jack:Nice
Bob:I mean, that sounds like a solid effort, buddy. You know what?
Mark:Thanks
Bob:I like your thinking
Mark:It would've *giggle* blown up if you hadn't have sunk it
Bob:That's the real stretch you got there
Mark:Whooo, nice maneuvering!
Jack:Sick Wade:Is anyone reloading this one? Bob: Yeah
Bob:This guy's got some maneuvers
Jack:Yeah, I got--
Mark:Two motherfuckers coming round the bend!
Jack:Get ready to motherfuck!
Mark:Oooh, my motherfucker's already at maximum!
Bob:Are they behind us?
Bob:We're going to save the HMS Swaaaaaaag
Wade:Our captain's been telling us stuff this entire time, I've not heard a thing he's said
Mark:The swag is fighting somebody!
Bob:There's a British ship directly in front of us sinking slowly
Mark: Nevermind!
Jack:Well it's gone now!
Mark:Guys, I'm going for it!
Mark:Guys, I've got this!
Wade and Jack:MARK!!!
*Laughing at Mark's stupidity
Mark:NO! DON'T LEAVE ME!
Bob:See ya
Jack:Wait, wait. I'll give you a nice send-off!
Mark:Shoot me! Bob:I'll throw you a rope, see ya!
Mark:Kill me!
Jack:Oh, there's an enemy in the water as well. There's two enemies in the water!
Mark:I'll get them, don't worry
*Bob and Jack cheering on Mark* Mark:Don't worry, I'll get em
Jack:We just flew past him
Wade:Swim at em!
Mark:I'mma fuck them up Jack:Keep going forward
Mark:Guys, I see one
Mark:He's gonna be fucked up
Mark:Nevermind, he died
Bob:Wait, where's Mark? Is Mark off the left side of the ship?
Mark:Nope, I'm dead...
Jack:He's WAY behind us now
Mark *Giggles*:I'm dead now
Bob:On the right side coming around this island
Bob:there should be some more guys to shoots-at
Mark:Alright Wade:Oh yarrr
Wade:Me booty there be
*Mark grunts approvingly*
Bob:Oh good pirate talk Wade, you're really getting me hard
Mark:I'mma snipe them Bob:We's got some guys's
Wade:WOAH!
Jack:HEY! I FUCKING HIT THEM!
Mark:You did? Bob:My god, you're a wizard!
Mark:Damn! (Oh ye have little faith in Jack!!)
Jack:I got sail damage! I don't even know what I'm firing at!
Bob:But you got sail damage so fuck those guys! Mark:I think you're firing at their sails
Mark:--by that logic
*Wade laughs* Jack (sarcastic):Well YEAH!
*Everyone laughs*
Mark:Ahh, we have fun here on the pirate seas Jack:Teehee
Mark:Ahh, we have fun here on the pirate seas Jack:"Lawl XD"
Bob:Bad guys!
Mark:I'm on the roost! Jack:Sail hit!
Jack:Sail hit. Okay, I'm ready to FUCK!
Bob:I'm about to fuck them up so hard right now
Mark:Where are the mothers??
Wade:Screw them hard!
Jack:Here they come! Bob:Here we go baby
Bob:Here we go baby!
Mark:They're ramming!
Bob:Oh direct hit! Mark:Aand I'm gonna try--
Mark:WOAH! Jack:Oh yes!!
Mark:My god!
Bob:If they ram us, get ready for boarding and fighting
Mark:Guys, I'm dead again *giggles*
Jack:Fuck's sake Mark!
Mark (timid):I fell
Jack:Yeah, that's British over there. Fuck em up!
Bob:They're starting to move now. Lead em!
Jack:OHH JESUS CHRIST! Mark:Oooohh nice!
Wade:Should I---Ow!
Mark:Oh no, you died. Sorry, not as nice
Bob:Yay! I got the guy that killed you!
Bob:I avenged you, my friend!
Jack:THANK YOU BOB!
Jack (tearing up):Love you!
Wade:I think I'm bleedi--OWW
Bob:Oh my god Wade, you just like vomited blood!!
*Bob and Mark laugh at Wade's misfortune*
Bob:It was literally like a hose and your guy was like
Bob:"Uhhhhhhhh"
Bob:And then fell over
Mark:I'm hitting their sails as much as I can
Jack:I'm dead Bob:Oh we've got more holes!
Bob:Fix the holes motherfuckers! Mark:Okay, fixing holes, alright
Wade:I'm dead again!!
Mark:You know, name-calling gets nobody nowhere!
Mark:You know what I'm saying?
Bob:Fix the holes, friends that I love!
Mark:There we go! Now I wanna fix!
Bob:Fix the holes, people I respect as equals Mark:There we go, that's better!
Jack:I'M PUMPING!
Mark:That's nice, guys
Bob:Good job, good pumping buddy!
Mark:I feel like we're together anyways Jack:I'm pumping the motherfucker!
Mark:I got the hole you guys!
Bob:Pump it so good
Jack:We're still taking on water, lads!
Bob:It just takes a minute, you're doing it!
Mark:You know, if you enunciate, I might be able to understand what you're trying to talk about
Jack *garbles*:We're taking on water, lads! Wade:Which side cannons, now?
Mark:That's a little better, I think
Jack:That's a bit too far away to be firing that
Mark:Mmmmm!
Jack:I know but they're perfect within SAIL DAMAGE RANGE!
Mark:They're perfect for boarding you mean!
Jack and Wade:Uh-oh!!
Bob:Oh god! Oh!
Mark:I'M BOARDING THEM!
Mark:Oh...no I'm not. Apparently I'm not
Mark:Woah
Wade:I think I just shot Mark in the back of the head
Mark:No you didn't! I'm good guys!
Mark:Guys, don't worry about it Bob:Use the swivel guns, too! Jack:I got one!
Bob:Use the swivel guns, too Jack:I got one
Jack:K, load the fucking--
Jack:Oh you stupid Duckfoot and its four fucking barrels! Mark:Oh fuck!
Mark:AAHH
Mark:I'm trying to repair their head! Wade:RELOADING AS FAST AS I CAN
Wade:RELOADING AS FAST AS I CAN Bob:OH MY GOD MY GUN!
Bob:My gun takes like three minutes to reload, fuck's sake!
Jack:Yeah, Jesus Christ!
Mark:I'm going "mano-y-mano" on this! Bob:God fucking reload your shit already!
Mark:Ow
Mark:Hey, I killed him! Jack:No one's immobilized!
*Wade shouts in frustration*
*Mark imitates Wade*
Jack:Yes! Mark:Yay!
Bob:Oh! They fucking died, fucking bitches!
*Mark giggles*
Jack:I'm here!
Mark:WOAH
Wade:OH COME ON!! Mark:Holy shit dude!
Jack:There's a guy in the water, Bob!
Jack:There's a guy in the water, Bob! Mark:We're getting boarded!
Mark:We're getting boarded!!
Jack:I'm dead!
Jack:Lads! Bob:He's dead everybody!
Jack:Get them BUM-BUM!
Bob:I avenged you--oh shit!
Mark:I'm getting him Bob:Oh god!
Mark (dead):I was shot in the head guys!
Jack:Oh! Oh!
Mark:I like how that just goes black
Bob:Oh my god! They boarded us so hard!
Mark:Get a taste of my--
Mark:Aww, oh no... Jack:OH NO! WE GOT DESTROYED!
Bob:Aw man! Wade:NO!
Mark:Oh yeah?
Mark:Well get some of this! Jack:I'm in the water!
Jack:I'm in the water!
Mark:I'm on fire on their ship! Jack:I'm on board
Mark:I'm on their ship!
Jack:I boarded their ship!
Mark:Aaahhh...I'mma blow you fuckers up with my grenade!
Bob:Wait, am I the only one on OUR ship right now?
Bob:Wait, am I the only one on OUR ship right now? Jack:Do it, do it! You're on fire, Mark!
Bob:Wait, am I the only one on OUR ship right now? Jack:Do it, do it! You're on fire, Mark! Mark:I'm dead *giggles*
*Mark giggles*
Bob:Oh hello, okay friend
Jack:Yeah! We got them!
*Mark and Jack laugh*
Jack:Fuck them up!
*Dancy fun music*
(Thank you guys so much for watching this! And as always, I will SEE YOU, IN THE NEXT VIDEO!)
*Yes, we expect you to dance to this*
*Now watch more Markiplier videos*
*Do it*
*I dare you*