recently at my job we got a new supervisor one who happens to be retired
army after 20 years he and I had a pretty heavy run-in - which resulted in
getting HR involved the end result was that I would not be written up for what
he claimed I was doing he tried to make an example out of me almost as soon as
he got here assuming I was easy - he assumed I was an easy target anyways to
the point even though he and I had a falling-out I'd still like to see the
guy succeed at his job and become a great leader after listening to your
podcast over the last month I'm making an effort to improve our relationship at
this job instead of just avoiding the man I've reached I've recently purchased
your book extreme ownership how would you suggest I present this book to my
new supervisor and read or to read without him feeling as if I'm belittling
him as to say he needs work on his leadership I think he could benefit from
it greatly good question yeah it's actually a question I've answered on
here before but I'll answer it again because I even learned when I repeat
sure this is my latest version of what I tell people in the situation yeah
updated version sir cuz you get better at things you figure out better ways to
overcome challenges especially when you're presented with the same challenge
over and over again which I kind of am yeah some challenges like this one so
here's what here's what you do you give it to him and you say you know hey boss
or hey person hey I got this book and I'm trying to really emulate the
principles that are in this book it really hit me and I would I was
wondering if I could ask you a favor if you could just look through this book
kind of see what the principles are and then if you see me falling out of line
with the principles that are in this book let me know so I can fix them basic
things like if I'm not taking ownership of problems if I'm if I'm not keeping
things simple if I'm not supporting other people around me covering and
moving for them just let me know that's all I'm asking because I'm really trying
to do a better job could you do that for me so then the person says well yeah
okay fine you know and then they read the book and when they read the book
sure there's a chance that they'll be thinking like oh this book is about
everyone else and it's not about me right all right that's possible there is
also a chance a higher chance that they read the book and go move I make a lot
of excuses and I blame other people all the time I'm probably not doing a great
job as a leader and that might be subconscious I see that sometimes now
where people are subconsciously making adjustments because they don't want to
admit that they're the person that's that that the problem they don't want to
admit that they're the problem so they make these little adjustments kind of
subconsciously other people will tell me that the boss is like changing oh yeah
they're they're changing their game they won't admit it but they are changing
their game so that's what you hope for is that they do they go through that
trance that transformation from you know not taking ownership and treating people
bad and not trying to build relationships and all that stuff that
makes them into a bad leader into taking ownership building relationships
covering moving keeping things simple all the stuff that makes you a good
leader that's what the hope is now there's also a chance that this person's
gonna hold a grudge mmm right we we got a deal with that and I'll Tarrant Lee
talking to someone that had stepped on the toes of another business another
division inside their business another sales division and you know salespeople
are sort of known for being a protective and aggressively protective of their
territory well this guy kind of stepped into their territory a little bit cause
cause some bad bad vibes giant rift knees you don't know what should I do
you know I I feel like all this animosity now and it's one of those
times where I just said to myself well what would I actually do if I was in
that situation how would I try and get this problem solved well what I would do
is walk up to the person who I stepped into their territory and cause problems
and I'd say hey hey I want to tell you I totally was out of line when I stepped
in your territory that that was completely my fault and you know I was
just got target fixation which is bad I didn't talk to you which is bad I
stepped into your world which is bad and I left the disaster
and I I'm sorry that's that all that stuff everything that I just said all my
fault and I want to let you know that I completely recognized it and number one
anything I can do to try and redeem that and make it up and make you realize that
and anything I can do to support and help you move forward I don't I will not
let that happen again I just want to let you know that so boom just step up be
humble apologize and say hey can you what kind of you to help you what can I
do support you that's where I would go with these with this question and then
it's sort of an addition to that question yeah yeah it's kind of like you
know when you when you give your boss the book right and be like hey this is
what I'm doing is that kind of like when you when you get you know like it's on
my hands bad bad breath and then you put in gum you know you eat some gum and you
say hey you want some gum yeah yeah it's very similar you just break out the gum
you know I always like to do this you know just to make sure I was like to
have a piece of gum just to make sure you know yeah not funny or you want one
yeah yeah you could have yeah you might want to take two