I'm obviously like nervous for that to happen again to feel like in a very dark space
Hi everyone, welcome back to my channel and into my car today
I'm talking about my pregnancy fears this time around. I do have a 19 month old son
So I have been through pregnancy before this isn't my first rodeo
So to speak but there are some things like some fears that I've already experienced some fears
I currently have and some fears that'll probably be stronger once I hit like third trimester and
nearing labor so I kind of want to talk through all of my fears why I have them and kind of my strategy for
Mitigating the fear, I guess I tend to be a very anxious person
I don't like not feeling in control and that's the one thing I've learned about pregnancy is that you don't have
Any control baby is in control your body's in control
You can do the best
You can to try and be healthy to try and be on the right track and all that good stuff
But ultimately what's gonna happen is going to happen and your body does all these freaky things
so I had a really hard time with that the first time around it's just
Kind of that's one thing that I wasn't prepared for was yeah
I knew you grew a bump
but I didn't really know the extent to which your body changes through pregnancy and after you deliver. If you're new here every Thursday
I post videos relating to pregnancy. I've been documenting my pregnancy journey
I'm currently I'm almost 20 weeks pregnant and I've been doing a week-by-week pregnancy journey with bump dates if that interests you at all
Please hit that subscribe button. So you don't miss my future videos. One of my first fears that I had was
Miscarriage. I was terrified to have a miscarriage and the risk kind of goes down the further along you go
But I I myself have had very early
miscarriages and
Even though it was very early, it was still very hard. I hadn't had a baby yet
so it was kind of like my first
experience with pregnancy
so I think that still like haunted me even this time and then I
Have people close to me that have been through miscarriage early and later on
so it was definitely something that
I was very nervous about. The best thing that I did for myself in these cases, aside from you know
Not drinking a ton of caffeine and not doing all the things you are not supposed to do the best thing that I could do for
myself was just to try and ease my anxiety about it because ultimately a lot of the cause of
miscarriage if you are a generally healthy person is
Like chromosomal
Related has something to do with their DNA. It's not something you can control
It's just kind of the way the genetics lined up for you
So I just tried to really focus on the fact that I'm pregnant
I'm gonna breathe through this and I'm not gonna let this consume me. Another first trimester fear I had was
dehydration because this pregnancy I had so much nausea and
I vomited a lot there was a couple times where I had a stretch of time where I couldn't keep things down and I was
Kind of nervous that I was harming the baby in some way. If there's not enough fluids then things can happen
and of course like the more, you know, like the more anxiety you have. What I did was obviously I talked to
my doctor and the nurse about it at my appointments and they basically said hey if you
Experience this for more than X amount of hours then make sure to give us a call or go in to the hospital
I just tried to really make sure
to drink water lots of it
Whatever I could keep down
I did it in small spurts throughout the day as opposed to like chugging a bunch of water at one particular time
And then another thing I did was I drank Pedialyte. Or I tried. I hated the taste of it
So I watered it down
I'd put it in orange juice or whatever and then I'm typically not one to drink a ton of juice
I just feel like it's like empty calories, but
If juice sounded good, I gave myself juice whatever liquid I could
Tolerate that's what I did and I keep talking about stress and anxiety
just harming the baby and not even knowing it or not doing all the things that you're supposed to be doing.
Honestly, like that's every single phase. It's here today
It'll be here tomorrow and will be there all the way up probably until the baby is until probably till I die.
That's how long I'll be anxious about my child. It's a like a step by step process
I just try to talk about my anxiety and try to keep conversation open
Especially as my husband he tends to balance me out
sometimes I get all frantic and
Anxious over things and he kind of like look like let's talk about this because you're being a little bit
Ridiculous, that's kind of how I'm dealing with that. And then I said that I was sick
I was really really sick
Throughout my first trimester and even a couple weeks into my second trimester
that entire time I was so nervous that I would be sick the whole time because I've heard
horror stories of women that are not only nauseous all the way up until
baby is born but they like start throwing up all the way until baby is born and I just like. I spent like 10 weeks where I
Just felt like I didn't want to leave the house most days. I had some good days
I was so nervous that I wouldn't really get to enjoy this pregnancy
This is a whole other video, but I didn't really get to enjoy the last pregnancy. Some things happened during that pregnancy
That made it just a really hard time in my life. I had a lot of pressure on myself
I put a lot of pressure on myself to make sure that this pregnancy was amazing
I really wanted it to be you know
What you see on Instagram. Being really sick put a damper on things because I wasn't that sick with my first again
That's more of a day-by-day thing
I kept trying to keep things in perspective and
Not let the unknowns
Consume me because ultimately I can't control that. Another thing that is a concern for me
Now and has been and probably will continue to be is either not gaining enough weight or gaining too much weight. Right now
It's more just like I feel like I'm on the right track, but during the first trimester I was worried
I wasn't gaining enough weight. I wasn't gaining any weight or I was possibly even losing weight, but my last pregnancy
When I had the gestational diabetes
Test done like later on. I think it's in the early third trimester
I was kind of like borderline gestational diabetic. That fear that like that could happen again diabetes runs in my family
Obviously, I you know, I don't want to have that at all
especially during pregnancy, so
That was a fear of mine
So like in that case it would be like getting too much weight eating too much bad stuff because you know cravings happen
hello, basically what I'm doing to help with that is just listening to my body and
Still eating and if I'm hungry I eat
But I'm trying to make you know, some healthy choices, but not driving myself crazy over eating a salad every single time
I eat because that's just not
It's just not
Doable for me right now. Another fear is how my toddler is going to handle
Having another person around a baby that needs mom and dad. He's got such a great temperament. He really he's really such a sweet baby.
Toddler. but he's kind of recently entered into this phase where he is
More needy than he used to be like he's more clingy to me that makes me kind of nervous to see how he's gonna handle
Me like kind of being attached to someone else sometimes I don't want him to feel any less
loved any less
Appreciated any less like I don't want him to feel like he's getting less attention. Of course,
I know some of that is good for a child to
You know not get too used to feeling like they deserve all the attention
I totally get that and I'm 100% on board with that but the transition of course I'm a little bit nervous about so
what I'm doing is
Here soon I'm going to introduce a baby doll so that he kind of gets used to the concept of a baby perhaps
And then that's pretty much all I'm doing if you have any tips for this. If you have been through this yourself
I'd love to hear what you did with your kids if you were nervous about it and how they handled it
Okay, and this is going to be a whole separate video
But I am kind of nervous about postpartum depression and postpartum anxiety. With Eli
I really I think I had that
and
I did not seek help. I pretty much kept to myself
except for my husband
He saw my crazy more than anyone. There were circumstantial things that happened that made it kind of hard
but I just
I'm obviously like nervous for that to happen again to feel like in a very dark space right after baby's born
So what I'm doing this time is I'm just I'm recognizing it. I think that's number one
I have a counselor now, I don't see her currently, but if I need her I know she's there
I will see her if I start to feel like I have any postpartum stuff going on
I'm just trying to like stay open with my family and talk about my feelings more and make sure at that time
I'm letting people know my needs. Okay, and then like labor and delivery
I think this should also be kind of a separate video. Obviously so many things can happen in labor and delivery
Last time I almost had to go for C-Section
Because I wasn't progressing
That's a whole story in and of itself. I was in labor for like five years. I just obviously want everything to go smoothly and
to have intact body parts after the fact. Afterwards I was a little bit culture shocked by
The change in your body after you deliver a baby
I know that sounds like... I'm a nurse for goodness sakes. I had seen a birth in person
But honestly until it happens to you
You have no idea what it feels like and what's actually going on. I think honestly having been through it
It's part of my prep for this I feel better about it. And then just having been through it
I can kind of I feel like I am a little bit more empowered to
Make sure that I'm doing what I want to do in that process
even though I did a really great job of that last time I
Was a bit stubborn which made the delivery a little bit more- even more difficult looking back in hindsight
I was really dead set on not getting an epidural and I honestly think that was a huge part of my problem. So
I'll talk about that in another video. Those are my major fears
But ultimately what I want is a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby. That's it
If you have any tips for me after after watching this if you've been through any of the things that I mentioned
Please leave them in the comments. I would love to hear them
I really really appreciate you being here
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That is all it takes and we will see you in the next video. Thanks so much. Bye!