There are so many good books. One of the best that I've read in the past year is
The Book Of Joy by Douglas Abrams. A conversation between the Dalai Lama and
Archbishop Desmond Tutu. There's some great positivity highlights
from that book that I'll share with you today.
One of the things I've enjoyed the most about my practice is podcasting. I've had
an opportunity to interview some really amazing people. 2 of the people that I
haven't yet interviewed but I honor and respect so much are the Dalai Lama and
Archbishop Desmond Tutu. Both of whom have written things that have inspired
me and helped to guide my practice. And they are arguably 2 of the most
prominent spiritual leaders on the planet. They got together for a little
retreat that was moderated and recorded by Douglas Abrams. This is what became
The Book Of Joy. Probably one of the most inspiring books that I've read in the
past year. And I wanted to share a few highlights with you. In this book, the
conversation that is recorded between these 2 great men is filled with
examples of positivity. And it excites me when I hear people like this referring
to principles that I've discovered in my own journey as a clinical psychologist
and an author that writes about positivity all the time. Here's what they
shared as the 8 pillars of joy. The first pillar is perspective. I refer to
this as paradigm in my book. It's really your view of things. And everyone has a
little different angle on different things. Perspective allows us to see even
the most troubling circumstances in our world as being something that is
positive and good for us. The second pillar of joy discussed by
these 2 great leaders was humility. I believe that one of the most destructive
forces on the planet that is probably common to most human beings is
destructive pride. And here are 2 very prominent leaders who are talking about
the importance of humility. That's also an important part of the positivity. In
fact, I don't make a lot of distinctions between positivity and joy. I think they
can be used almost interchangeably. And that's
I was so excited to hear that humility is the second pillar. The third pillar is
humor which is fun. When you think of spiritual leaders like the Dalai Lama,
Archbishop Desmond Tutu, you don't necessarily equate that to a comedy club.
These guys had some fun when they got together. They were teasing each other,
they were laughing, they were joking. They were having a good time. And it reminded
me that it's important in positivity to maintain a good sense of humor and to
roll with whatever the world hands you. Some people are funny but they don't
have a good sense of humor. I was talking to Jeanne Robertson not too long ago
about this. She is one of the funniest people on the planet in my opinion. You
can look her up right here on YouTube. Jeanne Robertson. 6-foot-t2, thick
southern accent. Just one of the funniest G-rated family friendly comedians on the
planet. And she made this comment. She said, "Some people are funny but they
don't have a sense of humor. And when the smallest little thing goes wrong, it tips
them over and they become angry and start cursing the world." Sense of humor
is a really important part of joy and clearly one of the components of
positivity. Pillar number four is acceptance.
Vicki and I years ago read a book called The Knight In Rusty Armor. It's a quick
little read and very profound in so many ways. And I remember one of the quotes
from this book was "The more we learn to accept rather than expect, the less
disappointment we feel in our life." "I can't accept this." have you ever said
that to yourself? Well, what are your options? Either you accept it or you
don't it doesn't change the fact that certain things exist in your reality.
Acceptance put you in a place where you can actually do something productive
with that. The fifth pillar is forgiveness. Archbishop Tutu is a man
that I have respected for years as an authority in
the area of forgiveness. He wrote a book about that where he gave some very
practical steps for how we let go of some of the things that might cause
grievances in our heart. I think grievances rob our joy. They
steal our joy from us. And if we can practice forgiveness, it's letting
go of the grievance. And it's interesting to me that forgiveness is not saying
that what happened was okay. In fact, both of these men have experienced trials and
adversity in their life that might arguably put them in a position to hold
a grievance. But both of them also acknowledge the importance of releasing
those grievances from our own heart and mind so that we can move forward with
some level of peace and joy. It's one of the pillars of joy. Pillar number 6 is
gratitude. You've heard me talk about this before. And really, it's a starting
place for positivity which contributes to our joy. Seeing what we have and being
grateful for it is a powerful way to create what I call psychological fuel. Or
even currency that we take forward to fuel up to power up and to fund what's
next. And what's next is always some level of creation -_what are we going to go
make with the things that life has handed us? Be grateful for what you have
and your joy will increase. That is the sixth pillar of joy. Pillar number 7
is compassion. That's an interesting word. One of my colleagues pointed out to me
years ago he said, passion has to do with some root words that denote suffering.
Really? I didn't realize that before. It's being willing to suffer for something.
It's such a commitment to a principle or a concept or cause
that you're willing to suffer for it. One of my good friends just announced that
he's running for congress. And one of my thoughts was, "Well, you're asking for some
pain, for some suffering." And it's true. But he is so committed to the cause that
he's willing to suffer for it. And I think that's an important
characteristic in our public figures in our elected leaders and officials. But
what does that have to do with our own joy? When you live with that level of
commitment to something, it lights you up. And it creates opportunities for you to
serve and to increase not only your own joy but the joy of other people around
you as well. The eighth pillar of joy from this great meeting of the minds is
generosity. I love that. When your life is so full and you feel so much gratitude
for the rich and abundant life that you have, you naturally feel compelled to
share that. Philanthropy, generosity, having a heart full of love that you are
willing to share with other people. Many of the examples that were shared in the
book of joy had to do with this particular pillar. Having the willingness
to give. And not for the purpose of receiving anything in return. It's a very
selfless very generous act and gift that we give to other people. That contributes
to joy. I was so excited to read this book and to see a validation really that
I'm on track with what I've been sharing with you here on the channel. My own
experience tells me that these things are true. These 8 pillars of joy are
powerful ways for you to create a more joyful life. I really enjoyed the book of
joy and I would recommend that book to you. I don't do a lot of book
recommendations here on the channel. That's one that has really a Danny
packed on me in the last several months. I hope you enjoy it. The book of joy
parallels a lot of the things that I've written in my book. I would love to share
this one with you as well. Pathological Positivity is something that I would
love to put into your hand. You pay the shipping, I'll pay for the book. Sound
like a good deal? DrPaulJenkins.com. Big oragne button,
click on it. Fill out your information and I'll ship this out to you.