-Go get him, kitty.
Oh! -Oh!
-Yeah, get him, kitty.
-Get him, puppy.
[ Explosion ]
-Kitty!
[ Slow-motion ] No!
♪♪
-[ Chuckles ] Lorne, thank you so much
for taking the time out to talk.
You will not be sorry.
-I'm sure. What's up?
-Bill and I stayed up all night brainstorming,
and what we discovered is that there are two things
that everyone loves.
-Cats and lasers. -That's right.
Cats and lasers.
So we went out and shot a short film all on our own
that's full of both.
-Cats and lasers.
And I got to tell you, it came out great.
And I-I think it would be perfect for the show.
-I don't know. It doesn't sound good.
-Okay, that's fair, but I think you should watch it
before you make any final decisions.
♪♪
-Thanks for saving my life earlier today,
Admiral Spaceship.
I owe you one.
-As long as we have cats
that shoot lasers out of their mouths, we'll be okay.
-Oh, geez! I'm getting a transmission from base.
[ Beeping ]
Hello? The princess has been kidnapped.
-Robotron!
[ Cocking ]
-Let's roll.
-Boy, I can't wait to get back to home base.
-Hey, look out! It's a bad guy!
-I got him, partner!
Oh, my God, strays. -Strays!
Whoo-hoo!
♪♪
-I don't -- What is that?
There's the princess. -Oh.
-Time for a rescue.
-Princess, you're being saved by us.
-Now that we've rescued you,
who would you say you like better between the two of us?
-Say Nitro.
Say Nitro!
-Now say that you want to have sex with both of us.
Say you had sex with both of us. -What?!
-Just -- -No, that's enough.
-I had sex with both you guys.
-Let's get out of here!
[ Cocking ]
-Well, partner, looks like everything's gonna be alright.
-You said it.
-[ Robotic voice ] Filthy humans.
Prepare to die!
-Robotron!
♪♪
-Oh, no! I'm out of ammo!
-Take my spare.
♪♪
-Aaah!
[ Explosion ]
Admiral Spaceship.
-Looks like this was a one-way ticket, eh, Kemosabe?
-Damn these laser cats.
-No, not the laser cats.
Damn...us.
-You stay with me. You stay with --
-Ahh.
-No!
-So? -What do you think?
-Get out.
-Okay. -Sounds good.
-Awesome.
-Okay, Lorne, first off,
thank you so much for taking the time to meet with us.
We know you're really busy.
-Yeah, now, we know you were not crazy
about our last film "Laser Cats."
And that's totally understandable.
-Yeah, totally.
I mean, cats shooting lasers out of their mouths?
I mean, that's kid stuff.
-Exactly, and we're adults.
And what do adults love?
Politics.
-Yeah, so we went out and shot an entirely new film
that is just ripped from today's headlines.
-I think you're gonna be really impressed.
-Okay.
♪♪
-Well, that's it.
We finally found the cure
that turns laser cats into regular cats.
-Now the world can live in peace.
-I'll be taking that.
-Dr. Scientist!
[ Grunts ]
-Oh!
-Let me get this straight.
You're never gonna use a laser cat again.
-That's right.
When I almost died, I realized that violence is bad
and laser cats are the problem.
-Or the solution. Future spike!
-Ah! Nice shot.
-Oh, geez, I'm getting a transmission
from the president of the galaxy.
[ Beeping ]
Hello? No way!
The cure that turns laser cats into regular cats
has been stolen.
-Dr. Scientist.
-Let's roll.
If we're gonna defeat Dr. Scientist,
we're gonna need some heavy artillery.
-Yeah. [ Beeping ]
-Identity approved. Access granted.
[ Beeping ]
♪♪
-Ay, caramba.
♪♪
-Here you go. Oh, wait. I forgot.
You don't use laser cats anymore.
[ Beep, engine roaring ]
Touchdown.
-Heads up, partner. We're in Dr. Scientist's lair.
He's an evil genius.
-What the --
-We're trapped.
-Welcome, Nitro and Admiral Spaceship.
Careful with those laser cats.
The walls are coated with mirror.
-Screw that. -No!
[ Bottles clink ]
-Come on, partner. Let's get this bad guy.
-Keep your eyes peeled. He could be anywhere.
-Jenga!
-Dr. Scientist.
-Jenga. [ Laughing ]
[ Click ] -Damn! I got to reload.
Come on, Boots. Eat up, Boots.
Reloading! -Shoot him.
-Yes. [ Laughs ]
-Use the sniper cat.
-I can't get a shot!
He's moving around too much.
-Eat laser.
-No. Nitro.
[ Whirring ]
-Looks like it's the end of the line, Andy-miral Spaceship.
-That may be, but you're forgetting one thing.
-[ Laughs ] What's that?
-I just started using laser cats again.
[ Cat cocks, bang ]
You okay, Nitro?
-Yeah, buddy. That was too close.
-You said it.
Hey, what do you say we head back to base
and drink some space beers?
-I'm already there.
[ Both laugh ]
-So was that great or what?
-No.
-Do you want us to leave?
-Yes.
Now. -Right.
-Thanks for your time.
-Hey, Lorne, sorry to interrupt your dinner,
but we have an idea that you need to hear immediately.
-Okay.
-Now, I don't mean to toot our own horn on this one,
but I think we may have captured lightning in a bottle.
-And this is top secret stuff for your eyes only.
No nerds.
-This is Senator Dodd.
We were just discussing the state of the economy.
-Nice to meet you.
-Is this "Laser Cats"?
-[ Laughing ] What?
Let's just watch it.
-...laser cats! No laser cats!
-As your mayor, I am proud to announce
that laser cats are now illegal.
[ Crowd cheering ] Yes, yes.
Everyone must turn in their laser cats
by the end of the day.
-Give up my laser cat?
I think not, Kemosabe.
-You read my mind, Kemosabe.
♪♪
[ Beep ]
-Nice throw, Nitro.
-Man, I'm glad you finally got that bionic-eye surgery.
-You said it.
Once this baby heals,
I'll be able to hit any target, no matter how small.
-Oh, geez! Gettin' a message from base!
[ Beeping ]
It's Captain Ted, our boss.
Let's get out of here.
-You called for us, Captain?
-Nitro, Admiral Spaceship, the terrors of the galaxy.
[ Cocking ] Whoa, guys.
You have laser cats? They're illegal.
These cats, they're tearing up the galaxy.
-Alright, Captain, anything for you.
-Do the right thing.
-I'm gonna miss you, little Kemosabe.
-Adiós, buddy.
-People of Earth, I am so proud of you
for giving me all of your laser cats.
And now that I have them, I'm going to take over the universe.
-He doesn't have all the laser cats.
-Lock and load.
[ Cocking ]
[ Cat roaring ]
-Ah, yes, all the laser cats in the world.
No one can stop me now.
-Intruder alert! Intruder alert!
[ Beeping ]
-Oh, no! The hatch is opening!
-We'll be sucked into outer space!
[ Both screaming ]
-Don't let go!
-[ Screaming ]
-Don't let go!
-[ Shouting ]
-Oh, no!
Whoa!
-Yee-haw! Whoo!
Sorry, buddy, that was too close.
-Don't ever scare me like that again, partner, ever.
-Watch out! Bad guys!
-Shoot there!
-Whoa! -Whoa!
-Right?
-Come on, partner. Mayor Top-Hat's just up ahead.
-[ Gasps ] Laser cats!
-Laser dogs!
-Go get him, kitty.
Oh! -Oh!
-Yeah, get him, kitty!
-Get him, puppy!
[ Explosion ]
-Kitty!
[ Slow-motion ] No!
-Admiral Spaceship, get out of the way!
Aaaah!
-Nitro, the lock on the cage! Shoot it!
-I can't hit the target! It's too small!
-Once this baby heals, I'll be able to hit any target,
no matter how small.
Here goes nothing.
Nitro, hit me!
[ Beeping ]
-No!
[ Grunting ]
-Looks like the cat's got his tongue.
-For bravery beyond the call of duty,
I present these awards to Admiral Spaceship and Nitro.
♪♪
Fire!
[ Cocking ]
Fire!
[ Lasers fire ]
Fire! [ Lasers fire ]
-So, Lorne, what'd you think?
-He went home, but I loved it.
-Really? -No.
-Enjoy your meal. -Bye.