[Singing] "Harry the Handsome Butcher."
It's me!
[Music]
Ooh! Am I happy to see you, Harry the Handsome Butcher~.
What can I do for you?
I'd like to try the most wonderful, perfect cut of meat you have.
Coming right up!
[Whoosh]
[Knife slices]
*What the Fuck???*
[Slap] [bell dings]
So?... Wanna go out sometime?
[Winking]
[Bell Ringing]
[Loud Scream]
[Singing] "Harry the Handsome Butcher."
It's me!
[Outro]
[Screaming] [Keyboard typing]
[Screaming]
[Screaming] [Mouse click]
[Boom]
[Singing] "Harry the Handsome Butcher."
It's me!
Damn it Harry!
We lost half a star yesterday after your little incident!
Now we're down to one!
This used to be a respectable establishment and you've RUINED IT!
YOU'RE FIRED!
What! Fired?
That's right!
Now get out of my face!
Maybe you should get out of your face.
[Hit]
[Footsteps]
[Door opening]
[Sighs]
How will I ever get a job in this economy?
Ooh! There's one.
[Music] [Dancing]
Hello there!!
I'm Harry the Handsome -- well, nothing right now.
I'd like a job at this...
POHSRIAPERREDOPMAQ?
O...kay? Do you have a resume?
NOPE.
What's the pay like, huh?
Does it pay...handsomely?
It pays minimum wage.
Perfect!
Okay, I guess you're hired.
Hooray!
[Ding]
Hello? Can somebody help me?
Aaand heres your first job.
Hello there, my dear man!
I'll fix your problem in a jiffy!
They don't call me handsome for nothing!
[BANG]
Well, Handsome, my computer won't work.
I've tried everything.
Hmm... Well, lets try this!
[Slap]
[Vrrrrr] [Static]
[Here's Harry!]
All working now!
OooOooh [Thud]
You're fired, Harry.
In that case, I'll be on my way.
[Music]
Alright, is this him?
No, no, he had no face.
Liiiike this?
OH GOD, THATS HIM!
That is one sexy butcher...
Don't worry, Mr. Manager, we'll nail this Harry guy.
Whoever... he... is. [Ominous Music]
[Singing] "Harry the Handsome Butcher."
Its me!
[Outro]
[Boom]
[Singing] "Harry the Handsome Butcher."
Part Three!
Sigh, fired twice in the same day.
How will old Harry ever find a job now?
[Wooosh]
[Sliding whistle]
Wanted, eh?
Harry the Handsome Butcher?
That's me!
[Music] [Dancing]
All right men, listen up. It's been an entire afternoon and Harry the Handsome Butcher is still at large.
Get out there and do your goddamn job!
Did you say...
job?
[Whoosh] [Ding]
[Whoosh again] Because I'm looking for one!
[Lots of guns loading]
[DRAMATIC DUN]
-Hey, is that Bill Gates?
[Click]
[Wump]
[SLAM]
[Whack]
Sir, it's Fatty Bones Malone!
Notorious drug lord!?
Yeah, he's back on the streets, and he's peddling that sweet-ass crystal meth of his!
The children!
What do we do??
We need to infiltrate his organization. We need someone who can blend in, disappear into the crowd. Someone...
without a face...
[Clank]
Gentlemen, it brings me no pleasure to say this, [Whack] but I've learned that one of you has been [Whack] working as a police informant,
for the past 6 years.
And I believe I know exactly who it is.
Reggie!
What!? No boss, I didnt-!
[Guns clicking]
[Pistol and assault rifle firing]
[Crash] AAAAAaAaa [Thud]
No face, my closest, most trusted friend,
We've seen each other through many trials and tribulations.
You even came to my daughter's wedding,
on account of the fact that you married her.
And yet, I couldn't help but notice that you did not join in on the execution of Reggie.
Sorry boss, I wanted to. It's just that-well,
I've been working as a police informant for the past 6 years!
No face! You two faced rat!
[Click]
[Wump]
[SLAM]
[Whoosh]
Thank you for your outstanding service, Harry the Handsome...
[Thoomp]
..hero.
[WHACK]
Just doing my job!
Now back to jail with ya, you piece of shit!
[SLAM]
Dang, fired again!
[Singing] "Harry the Handsome Butcher."
Part Three!
[Snoring]
[Pop] -Psst!
[More snoring]
[Pop] -Psst!
[Pop] -Hey!
[Whispering]
[Pop] What do you say we make a CLEAN getaway? [Haha get it]
[Outro]
Yaargh, did you know Cyanide and Happiness has a Patreon?
Well, you can keep this ship afloat by giving them some of your booty.
[Outro]