Hi. In this video I'm going to share one thing most men are craving from you in bed
that they're not telling you.
[music]
Hi there. Mat Shaffer, your empowerment, connection and relationship coach.
I'm a former attorney who chose to use his powers for good
to support women in creating more fulfilling,
passionate relationships with men and with themselves.
I'm really excited to talk to you today about this topic,
this one thing that men really want from you in bed,
and most of them have a tough time asking for it,
but before we dive into that, take a second, hit that little subscribe button
and don't forget to click the little bell.
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and I've created a great training in the caption or comments
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Now, let's dive into this
because there is one thing that men dearly want from you,
that they're generally not going to bring up,
they're not going to talk about it because men have a lot of ego.
When men are involved in sexual relations with you,
when men are being physical with you,
they want to feel like they've got it under control.
They want to feel like they're the ones that are managing it,
that they can do whatever it is that you need, that you want.
They want to feel that sense of empowerment,
but there's something that they really, really want from you.
Men want guidance from you in bed.
They want to know from you what it is that you like,
and ladies, I have a newsflash for you,
men aren't mind readers and they would absolutely love for you
to express to them and communicate to them exactly what it is that you want,
that you need to feel good.
Where you want them to put their hands or how you want them to touch you,
how you want them to make love to you,
all the things, what your favorite positions are.
All the things that are your deepest preferences or your kinks,
men would love to know all that.
A lot of times, men are scared to ask for so many reasons,
because maybe they're insecure, maybe they don't want to talk about
why they're not able to just do the things that you want,
maybe they're afraid that something you're into
is something that they're not going to be able to do
or something they're not going to be comfortable with.
There's a lot of layers of insecurity that stop men from asking,
but they're deeply craving making you feel as good as they possibly can.
Every man has a fundamental desire to do the best job that they can for you.
Especially when it comes to between the sheets.
Trust me when I say, every man is craving guidance from you.
How can you give that to them?
How can you give men the sort of guidance in bed
that's going to help everything become a more powerful, more pleasurable,
more connected experience for both you?
First off, of course, obviously, you can express it to him verbally.
You can tell him, "You know what, honey,
it would just be so powerful if you were to touch me this way."
I know that might be scary for you to think about actually just expressing to a man
what it is that you want in bed,
especially if maybe it's a kink that you haven't shared with a man before,
that maybe you're into bondage or whatever it is that you're into.
This is a judgment-free zone.
Whatever it is that you're into,
I invite you to step out of your comfort zone
and tell him, tell him playfully, tell him sensually, tell him invitingly,
"It would feel so good if you would touch me here.
It would feel so good for you to tie me up."
"Have you ever done that before?"
Asking him questions is a great way to begin a conversation,
especially if it's around something that may feel a little taboo to you.
"Have you ever explored this type of foreplay or this type of sex?"
and then just start getting his opinion on it and begin a conversation around it,
because then if you ask him if he's ever done it,
chances are he's going to respond with,
"Well, no, I haven't done that but I've been curious about it.
Have you ever done it?"
Then you can, again, start expressing to him on what it is that you're into.
[chuckles] Open with a question and then during the dialogue,
you will be able to express what it is that you like,
but sharing with him what you want verbally is just one way to talk about
what it is that you like in bed.
One of the even more powerful ways to communicate and express this to him
is through your body,
is through your guidance, your physical guidance.
Just taking his hands and putting them on your body,
using your body to guide him,
just going into the positions that you want, that you like.
Taking the initiative, it's okay to do that,
it's not going to be a masculine depolarizing thing
for you to take a little control, take a little guidance,
and become that driving force temporarily in the bedroom.
It's okay and trust me, he'll appreciate it.
He'll appreciate it if you demonstrate to him what it is that you like,
I guarantee it.
Help a brother out.
Show a man what it is that you like,
help him understand and if he's doing something right,
acknowledge him with moans,
give him clear indicators that he's doing things right.
Once you've guided him and he's following your lead,
and then let him take the initiative from there.
That's how you shift out of your masculine back into your feminine,
but don't be afraid to take the lead for a little bit
to help guide him into doing exactly what it is that you want
because nothing's more frustrating for a guy
than to be doing things with a woman in bed,
and just getting the sense that maybe she's not enjoying it as much as she could,
but not knowing where to go next.
A lot of times, it's tough for a man to ask,
"This isn't really working for you, is it? What else can we do?"
Take the initiative and give a man what he's craving from you in bed,
but he's afraid to ask for, and that is guidance.
I hope you enjoyed this video.
If you did, take a second, hit that little subscribe button,
and don't forget to click the link in the comments or caption.
I've created a great training
that I know is really going to help you in your relationships.
I'll see you next time on my YouTube channel.
Bye-bye.