Fox News.
It's the number one cable news network in the country,
and the longest-serving member of the Trump administration.
Now, if you don't live your life in Fox world,
it's easy to forget
how influential Fox News actually is.
Because a lot of what we're seeing around the country
with people protesting stay-at-home orders,
saying experts like Dr. Fauci should be fired,
saying the coronavirus was created in a Chinese lab
to destroy America, but also China for some reason--
well, a lot of that stuff comes from Fox.
Is there at least the possibility
that the Chinese have developed
some type of biological weaponry,
and that's what got loose with all of this?
We're probably not going to have an accurate count
of what the real death total is.
And there may be reasons
that people seek an inaccurate death count.
If we wait for Dr. Fauci's seal of approval
to reopen America, we may not have an America to reopen.
We're not going to let you destroy this country
or our way of life.
We've worked too hard, and we fought too long
to lose it to a Wuhan.
That's what I said-- a Wuhan virus
that China knew about,
and intentionally protected Chinese citizens,
but allowed that virus to be released,
putting the rest of the world at risk.
Damn, Fox News is so paranoid!
It's like the entire network took a bad edible
that's been kicking in for, like, 25 years.
And they're not just paranoid.
Fox is actively spreading more misinformation
than a sex ed class taught by Mike Pence.
Then the husband kisses his wife, no tongue,
and God puts a baby in her belly,
and they keep their pants on,
because downstairs there's nothing.
Now, what a lot of people don't know, and, um,
this is really embarrassing,
is that The Daily Show is actually related to Fox News.
Yeah. What we found out is that Jeanine Pirro
is actually Desi Lydic's aunt twice removed
through her grandfather on her mother's sister's side.
And, as any good niece would do,
she checked in with Aunt Jeanine recently
to see how she's handling quarantine,
and... I don't think she's doing great.
Hey, Aunt Jeanine.
Just wanted to check in on you and see how you're doing.
Thanks so much for being with us tonight.
Yeah. Yeah, of course.
How-how are you holding up with all this COVID stuff?
COVID is being used as a cover
to fund liberal progressive programs.
Okay, you know what, Aunt Jeanine, can we just please
not get into all the conspiracy stuff right now?
Talk about anything else?
How about destroying Supreme Court Justice nominee
with rules that wouldn't get past
a fifth grade government class.
I'd rather not. Just no politics at all.
The left is just not in tune with America.
Hey, come on, I mean it!
That's a pretty dress.
Is it... it looks like your shoulders are gift wrapped.
Like, uh, I don't know, what shows are you watching?
We've been catching up on Jersey Shore.
-Have you seen it? -Gyms, hair salons
and tattoo parlors!
Getting close. Gym, Tan, Laundry. GTL.
Yeah. We've been bingeing it.
I mean, it's just, it's...
it's actually kind of hard to stop watching.
Why let them have that power over us?
I don't know, fun escapism?
That is absolutely stunning.
-It is just stunning to me. -Okay, well,
just wanted to make sure everyone was safe and healthy.
The rumors are that, uh, Kim Jong-un of, uh,
of North Korea is gravely ill.
Uh, have you heard anything?
No. I don't have any intel in the North Korean government.
You-you have groceries and everything you need?
We're-we're mostly just doing delivery.
Like, dim sum, that kind of thing.
The Chinese communist government
-brought us to our knees -Okay, you know what,
-I just, I can't, I can't... -with this virus,
-allegedly let out of their lab. -Okay, okay, that...
-Look at what they have done to us. -You know what? I can't.
Okay, look, Aunt Jeanine, if you can't just have
a normal conversation, I-I'm just gonna have to go.
-Impeachment. -Nope. Bye.