hi this is trixie mattel reacting to yet another extremely old and horribly embarrassing video
hi everyone welcome back to my channel i'm trixie mattel a world famous drag queen and sometimes
it's a cleansing exercise for the spirit to drag yourself through the mud entirely
and we've really built an entire channel on [ ] on ourselves
so if you guys don't know before i was a celebrated youtube a streamy award winner
a youtube gold play button owner i had a youtube makeup channel when i was like 19. i thought i
deleted the channel apparently i don't know who found it but we are gonna watch yet another a
video of me doing makeup i'm sure that i did an incredible job i'm sure it was flawless constantly
raising the bar for all of us let's see what the t was this video is called eight minute glitter face
yes the intro oh god i remember i forgot about the intro i forgot about my face we're drinking okay
this is why i went bald because when i had hair i didn't know what to do with it look at me i look
like jim halpert's stunt double not in a good way god i really have not grown into my looks
at all i didn't have a prime apparently this was my prime jesus christ oh my god thank god i took
to the internet to instruct the world how to put a purple eyeshadow and a purple glitter all over
your eye and look at that eyebrow look at that eyebrow that's a tammy brown eyebrow
it's the middle of the day you're 19 years old the milwaukee huh this is the kind of thing we
could throw on and just run really so this is the kind of thing where you can just throw it
on and run i want you to throw it on and run away and never make a video again this is
by the way don't go looking for their videos they're hidden they're hidden you'll never
find them all right first thing two-face shadow insurance oh my god you guys look at that and
that's a trial size two face shadow insurance i really thought i was someone i really thought i
was someone you guys don't understand people used to be all about the too faced shadow insurance
the urban decay private potion it was all about the primer you were using i don't even think i
remember liking too faced shadow insurance that much oh god shade sticks grease paint
sticks i hate that product i was so wanting to use nice makeup that i remember buying makeup
a product like this i remember hating it and still using it because it costed 18
so i'm like well i have to use it why was i making this for who who was watching it what did i want
from this to just soften them you don't want a harsh line you don't want a harsh line not on
this channel look at me using it it dries up and it starts to flake it's really disgusting but i'm
for some reason still using it guys maybe it's an age thing now if a product doesn't work for me the
first time it's out of here it's in the garbage who would ever want to speak to me or be my friend
or have sex with me whoa fluffy editing oh i actually remember this ben nye lumiere palette
i remember that not even that great of a shadow palette i don't know why i liked it so much cosmic
violet guys this is so humiliating who was i doing this for i guess for myself i would have hated me
i would have hated me wow i have like no dark circles you don't have to be super neat with
it because we're just gonna you don't have to be super neat with it well good thing
you don't know how to be neat with it look how quirky my nose is you guys i didn't even wear
skin makeup i was wearing this much eye makeup every day with nothing on my face why brush and
i'm going to press that right into my brow bone press there right into my brow bone i you guys
the accent the accent you guys press there right into my brow bone do you guys have a brow bone
i can't stand myself i can't stand myself i don't deserve to live my crease brush because i had like
four brushes for like five years and i would just wash them every day which honestly is what you're
supposed to do now i have hundreds of brushes and it just means that once every like three months my
assistant has to sit and clean hundreds of brushes it's a pretty clean application don't you guys
think i mean that's not the worst blending to me wow you guys i don't think you understand i went
to school like this i went to college like this claire's class she's wearing glitter from claire's
honestly i have no problem with that this is my favorite thing in this video so far
is that i looked right dead ass into this camera and said this glitter's from claire's
yeah and what is there a problem i want to say something else i think i have a beautiful eye
color you see that mole under one eye it's kind of faded over the years but it used to be a very
prominent mole and now it's like barely there isn't that crazy i'm sure i uploaded this and
was like i'm gonna change the internet i bet you this was recorded in on the east side of
milwaukee in my first apartment with my boyfriend matt at the time on his camera i'm sure look it i
mean just out of frame it'd be like if i was like anyway this is how i blend it you guys
ooh that's kind of pretty also from claire's i really don't even hate it i mean i wouldn't wear
it today it's so weird to think you guys this this person i'm not saying i'm successful but
this person went on to be a makeup person and like a drag person a person whose makeup artistry is
like a thing i mean that is crazy right to watch this i'm in my bedroom if you guys could see the
background i remember this apartment my bed is in the background like it is crazy to think about i
remember loving purple eyeshadow i was that person who would go to the stores and i would buy the
same three shades of purple over and over again like every brand same two colors where was i going
this day probably me honestly this is probably like 10 am getting ready to go to ballet gay
just gay look at me you guys look at me look at me why did i wear this type of garage door makeup
and then like dress like like my look didn't match my look do you know what i mean like i i look like
i dressed like a little preppy schoolboy and then i wore like i don't know like what i thought was
like edgy eye makeup i don't know you guys i really don't know what to tell you it doesn't
get better i will say whatever this lip is as a sir she didn't touch on it in the video i really
like it whatever it was a lot of people requested glitter stuff so i did glitter things a lot of
people requested glitter stuff everybody's been coming to my channel and requesting glitter i i
really don't think so jesus [ __ ] christ you guys that is really not it well we got through that
should we do another one i really don't know you guys this one's called mascara smudged eyes let's
see yes the lovely intro look i bet that's ben nye amethyst literally what we just saw me wearing
okay so here we have this is um britney she was a model hi brittany she was a musical theater
student um at my school she let me do makeup on her apparently this is the look i came up with i
can't explain the lash application i can't explain i i'm not i will not be addressing it at this time
this is a lot to unpack this is a lot to on pack tell me i don't look like i would be pushing a
shopping cart down hollywood boulevard oh my god look at my hair look at my makeup
look at my naked ear lobes look at my no lip liner look at my outfit the bed sheet hung
behind me that doesn't even fully cover look at the visible wall look at the material oh god
that brow that brow that brow looks like a sperm your brow is sperm you know what you guys like
listening to me talk it's so funny because i'm doing like an impersonation of what i think a
confident person sounds like when they talk does that make sense i can like see my internal panic
trying to say what i think youtubers say this person goes on to win a streamy award
in life okay think about that it gives it a really cool dirty grungy kind of dirty well we're right
about dirty dirty and grungy oh a time lapse oh cover the entire lid with cream liner i was really
into that huh you know why because i was makeup on a budget i never had nice shadows so i knew
that like whatever shadow i wanted to do i'd have to use a base matching color to get full coverage
so i remember using a lot of like crayons and paints on my eyes like my remember i eventually
got the kryolan aqua color palette and i would use that as a base smudge into crease lovely look at
the editing look at the editing what i tell you this lighting is a desk lamp this is the desk
lamp wow by the way look at the choice for me to have the wig on and almost all the makeup
you guys you couldn't tell me anything the way you can't tell me anything now that was still here you
couldn't tell me anything and i look like buffalo bill and every makeup i did was the same same as
now i wear the same makeup all the time i always did like light color medium dark and i'm like
i have invented makeup artistry i did the same makeup every day in like different colors which is
what i do now but look at this wig what would you call that texture a spiral perm distressed spiral
claire's claire's glitter by the way this is my drag eye tell me this isn't literally the makeup
we just saw me do in another video oh do you guys i wanted to do makeup so bad at the time and like
i didn't start wearing makeup till i was 19. one day i just started wearing makeup with no idea
what i was doing and uh it didn't improve for a very long time i don't have any like embarrassing
high school makeup experiences because i didn't wear makeup but i uh made all my makeup mistakes
very publicly in college the first day i came to school with like a full eye makeup on i remember
sydney roof wong she was a musical theater student she turned to me and she she tours with the mean
girls national tour now and i remember her going do you do your eyes every day now and i remember
going yeah and she was like cool i remember like that's all the affirmation i needed somebody
thought i was cool slap on that lash i can tell you that's a 199 i used to wear 199 lashes
ew ew the oh the waving ooh the waving ooh the waving the waving and the kissing i can't
stand myself i think we have time to look at one more video here before i completely throw up and
jump out a window this video is called products i love let's see what i loved oh god i just want to
say one thing really quick i love my hair here maybe it's because i haven't had hair in years
but this hair is kind of a serve right i don't know what i was doing i think i remember
just like waking up spraying got to be glued hairspray in my hair and while it was drying
scrunching and fluffing to the middle if i could be so bold i think i look kind of good here
is that sad that like i think this is kind of good i mean i think that when i used to wear makeup out
of drag the dirty smokey eye no lip look i was very into like concealer on the lips and like
nothing like no lips everybody in the industry is all about this product you guys what is my accent
that wasn't even wisconsin they said that all the people are all about this product where are you
from okay cinema secrets brush cleaner i actually still use that it's the best brush cleaner i've
used my whole life it's probably the first brush cleaner i've used and you just pull off with the
um the excess with your paper towel do you hear the accent you wipe off the excess with your paper
towel what what am i talking about i will say i think that this gray smoky eye my eyes look nice
and warm brown i like this look you guys i was such a product junkie i'm talking about picking
up products like it's nothing i was the person who i've spent all my money on makeup even though i
clearly didn't have it look at me pretending like i'm a professional this is before i had any kind
of like full-time makeup hustle this is before i was doing brides or anything i'm acting like i'm a
i'm such a liar i'm such a liar i do still love those urban decay liners the 24 7 liners those
are good oh i loved that eye shadow 75 that was a beautiful eye shadow it is a lot like sugar
pill poison plum and 75 i loved those i can't tell you i loved those eyeshadows i love those shadows
however makeup forever shadows are very expensive aren't they like 20 bucks or something i mean it's
kind of a lot and look at that the first blush i ever made was a hot pink nothing changes about me
soft and gentle does anybody remember soft and gentle mineralized skin finish i doubt
they make it anymore it was very beautiful isn't it weird to watch this is it just weird for me
like i'm 19 here i kind of think this makeup is a serve the more i watch this the more i'm like
you do look cool under eye circles are like my number one thing okay we just saw me i do not
have under eye circles i'm a liar i'm so nervous you guys i used to be so camera shy but i just i
think i wanted to try to like push through it and i'm so nervous here and look i mean for what like
no one's watching it i don't know why i was so nervous now i just want to say we've kind of come
full circle because this mac select cover-up is the same cover-up that i made fun of girl defined
in this video i made fun of those girls for wearing this concealer saying it was full coverage
when it's only medium in this clip i'm saying it's full coverage i'm also a liar roll the tapes
this stuff is so light and so pigmented that i can get my full coverage under my eyes should i get a
wig like i think i kind of look good with hair now oh revlon nude attitude i used to wear that a lot
my look you guys was concealer on the lips and just nude lipstick no liner no gloss
dry skin colored lips i don't know why i think this makeup is kind of a serve i think i look
cool i mean i will say i was 19 i think that this makeup is helping me look a little older
which is what i wanted at the time i wanted to look older because i remember i was freelancing
at this time in a sephora and i remember feeling like i was too young for the job and nobody took
me seriously like who's buying concealer from a 19 year old 19 year olds have nothing to conceal
i want the 50 year old tired lifelong smoker and drinker sun damage show hag to show me the
concealer you know what i mean studio touch-up stick that is a throw back cco cosmetics company
i really like this bronzer i have on whatever it is this like warm cheek i think it looks good
what do you guys think i think i have on soft and gentle too like you see that glow on my cheeks i
think that's soft and gentle nyx highlight i used to wear it all the time it just makes it look like
the eyeshadow has a lot of extra shimmer in it a lot of extra shimmer in it what is this where am
i from eyelash curler it's kind of spring action they're all spring action every lash curler is
spring action that's not true actually i take that back i think i kind of look great though
i will say i like this look i mean we've seen me look a lot worse at this age this is kind of a
serve right i look like someone who freelances at a sephora in 2009 which is exactly what was
happening here god i'm so boring and serious okay well what do we learn uh we learned that
people who don't have videos of themselves are very lucky i guess it's a good reminder of like
i don't know confidence and experience goes a long way but like oh my god i mean this just
really takes me back to a time when i just like all i wanted to do was do makeup and talk about
makeup and know about makeup and have people think i was a good makeup artist i honestly don't think
i had that much fun with makeup the way i do now the way like now i don't care what happens
with makeup i'm a lot more foolish with makeup whereas like this was me being like
i'm serious i'm very serious and so that's kind of interesting to watch i like doing these like react
style videos if you guys have anything on the internet you want me to like watch and react to
i would love to i love to sit here and have a little beverage and scream at a computer
i mean i love it thank you guys so much for watching me and i will see you next week goodbye