We've all heard of actors feuding with each other on set, but celebs who can't stand working
with animals?
Yes, that's actually a thing.
Here are the stories of stars who wish they would have heeded the wise words, "Never work
with children or animals."
James Corden
The film adaptation of Stephen Sondheim's musical Into The Woods combines the narratives
of several Brothers Grimm fairy tales.
It also features an original story about a childless couple, played by Emily Blunt and
James Corden, who must break a curse in order to fulfill their dream of starting a family.
According to Corden, the whole production would have run a lot smoother without Tug
the cow gumming up the works.
Speaking with USA Today, Corden couldn't talk enough trash on Tug, who played Milky White,
one of the objects the couple needed to retrieve to break the curse.
He referred to her as "the biggest diva on set," quipping,
"It didn't change my mind about eating burgers working with that cow."
Apparently Tug had a habit of letting out ill-timed moos in the middle of the human
actors' performances, including Meryl Streep as The Witch.
Seriously, who dares to moo when Meryl Streep is doing her thing?
David Schwimmer and Matthew Perry
Marcel, Ross' pet monkey on Friends, was played by probably the most famous animal actor on
this list.
Or rather, the two most famous animal actors: Katie and Monkey, two simian thespians who've
had incredible Hollywood success since their time with Manhattan's most improbable group
of twentysomethings.
Katie has gone on to roles in Bruce Almighty and 30 Rock, but she probably didn't get those
roles because her Friends co-stars recommended her.
Back in 1995, David Schwimmer told Entertainment Weekly,
"I hate that monkey.
I wish it were dead."
Matthew Perry was similarly unkind to Katie and Monkey.
In fact, he didn't even bother to learn their actual gender, or the fact that there were
two of them.
In 1997, he told The Morning Call,
"The monkey doesn't know he's on TV."
"Marcel, did you poo in the shoe?
Oh, Marcel, bad monkey."
Drea De Matteo
HBO's groundbreaking mafia drama The Sopranos used animals in a way unlike any other show
before it.
From the very beginning of the series, family boss Tony's affinity for animals was not only
a nod to his apparent sociopathy, but also the impetus for pivotal plot points.
But there was one animal on the show that didn't serve any loftier purpose than comic
relief: Adriana's dog, Cosette.
The little pooch was always irritating her fiancé, Tony's nephew Christopher, in some
way.
And in true, gruesome Sopranos fashion, Cosette met her end when Christopher sat on her in
a heroin-induced stupor.
That's about as dark as comic relief can get, but maybe there was a reason Cosette got taken
out like that.
Drea de Matteo, the actress who played Adriana, spilled the beans about Little Nicky, the
dog who played Cosette, to Entertainment Weekly,
"She was always biting us.
She wasn't even a full Maltese to be honest."
Charlize Theron
In the 2011 dramedy Young Adult, Charlize Theron plays Mavis, an emotionally damaged
author who goes on an ill-fated mission to reclaim an old high school flame.
She travels with Dolce, a tiny Pomeranian who doesn't do much in the film except get
stuffed into purses.
Perhaps the reason for that is because Hummer, the dog who played Dolce, was a total amateur.
During an interview on The Tonight Show, Theron told Jay Leno that Jason Reitman, the director
of the film, actually spotted Dolce out in public, and cast her right on the sidewalk.
As she put it,
"You couldn't get it to focus for like two seconds.
It was insane.
It really was the perfect dog for Mavis but it was driving Charlize crazy."
This really puts that old saying, "If you think it's expensive to hire a professional
to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur," into perspective, doesn't it?
Ben Stiller
Though comedy veteran Ben Stiller didn't come right out and say that he hated working with
the ferret in Along Came Polly, he was pretty candid about the time it attacked him out
of the blue.
Speaking with TV Guide, he said,
"I was bitten by the ferret, but I didn't do anything, I swear.
I was holding him up and he did this crazy turn-around thing.
He literally attached himself to my chin and he didn't let go."
Stiller then described the rodent's teeth as "sharp like razors," and suggested that
the reason for the attack was because the ferret could sense that he had gotten a root
canal the day before.
He ended up having to get a rabies shot because of the bite, which probably led to his uncomplimentary
commentary about the little guy during a press junket, when he said,
"I mean, they're rat-like creatures, just let's face it."
Kristen Stewart
"Riding horses scares the crap out of me."
Of all of the celebs on this list, Kristen Stewart is the only one who actively pursued
a role in spite of her fear of a certain four-legged co-star.
She's been afraid of horses ever since she fell off one when she was 9 years old and
broke her elbow.
Since then, she said she's literally hated the noble creatures as well as all of the
horseback riding she had to for Snow White and the Huntsman.
But for Stewart, this was finally a chance for her to, as she told People Magazine, do
a "badass action movie" that wasn't "thoughtlessly badass."
And so she rode.
A lot.
And she hurt herself a lot as well, but she did it all with the spirit of an action hero.
As she told People,
"I wanted so badly to do this that it was just like, 'Alright, well, if I perish by
horse, that's all good.'"
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