David shows up on the battle not to fight as a soldier David shows up as an errand
boy for his dad to bring money to bring a food I'm sorry some cheese and some
some other food to his brothers and to the general so david has no obligation
to fight Goliath Goliath opposes no direct threat to David Goliath is not
David's problem it's the problem to his brothers because they're the soldiers
its Saul's problem not David's and I want you to see this David comes on the
battlefield and Goliath over there who is the problem of David's brothers and
solved but David gets involved to help his brothers overcome their battle the
whole story of David killing Goliath is actually a story of a man coming in
someone's battle and helping someone else win a battle that wasn't their own
I genuinely believe when you arrive on the battlefield of marriage I know
marriage is beautiful my marriage is also a battlefield for some people it's
a battlefield because they fight each other but battlefield in meaning that
the other person that you are marrying the other person that you have married
many times will have their giants that they're fighting will have their issues
that they are trying to resolve in their life and you're coming alongside as
David helped them to beat that Goliath instead of beating them in marriage and
I want to share with you this morning this afternoon and practically how do we
go about helping someone else in our family win a spiritual battle without
crippling them or diminishing or destroying them because a lot of times
what happens is we don't beat the Goliath we beat each other
Goliath triumphs and yes we can get divorce and we can restart that but from
many cases it never fixes the real issue there are cases I'm not gonna go into
that's not a message today on divorce and remarriage and all of this stuff but
for a lot of people the problem continues statistics even say
that the second marriages the divorce rate is 75 percent the third
marriages is 80% the further you go that the divorce rate goes on why because
many people are leaving battlefields without Goliath's head they're leaving
with their spouses head it's their spouse that got crushed not the enemy
and we can restart and we can start clean move too and you see they get it
get a new new person but if it's the same problem it's you find yourself in
the same situation and we don't want that I always tell people if there is a
light bulb that went out in your house you don't replace the house you replace
the light bulb are you with me I want to write this down the first point is
remember your lions before you attempt to help someone with their Giants before
David could help his brothers with their Giants David had to be aware of the fact
that he had had lions in his own past the he by the grace of God has dealt
with before you can help someone with their issues make sure that your own
issues are being addressed and being faced one of the reasons we love to
ignore our issues is we try to shift the blame for how we are reacting how we are
acting on someone else and because our spouse is nearest to us we blame it on
them and it goes like this the reason why I'm angry is because my spouse is
crazy the reason why I am impatient or the reason why I do this is because they
do that if they stop doing that my problem will be resolved so the problem
is never you it's always them if they clean up their mess if they get rid of
their demons and their issues you won't have nothing actually you don't even
have any problems it's their problems they're creating problem for you amen
hallelujah so I want you to come with me where's the water so this is just this
is you this is you hold it together close to you it's called your issues now the
interesting part with your issues is that they're there there you're not
bothered by them and when you're younger and somebody comes and bumps in and you
see the waters about to splash you this since yourself from those people if it's
your brother and your sister you like I won't talk to you no more why because
you're provoking something you make me act crazy and so I won't talk to you if
it's friends you just block them disconnect with them but then you get
married and the person next to you keeps doing this five minutes I'm gonna get
ready in five minutes twenty minutes you always say five
minutes why is it taking you thirty minutes all the time your life spirit
I rebuke the lying spirit in you in Jesus name now the crazy part is this
when you got water all around you guess guess whose fault it is of course the
person who bombed you but remember this I never put the water in the cup I only
exposed the fact he has had water in his cup if he would have no water look at
this nothing comes out your spouse provokes the issues you got in you that
God wants you to deal with
I remember I had that with my with my brother won't mention which brother
there's only two was not hard to guess by the way and so and that one
particular brother when I was not married and he one time
drew me crazy so crazy we had to translate for my parents and he didn't
want to translate he just acted like he didn't speak English and so I had to
step in and translate it for my parents and I was like man why couldn't you do
it man you never do anything and I just got so
mad I don't go to the restroom I sit in the restroom and I'm just like my blood is
just boiling inside and I hear this still small whisper the Holy Spirit says
Vlad you're such an angry person I said don't my brother is just
insensitive disrespectful rebellious child like he never respects mom and dad
and I see here the Holy Spirit say you're such an angry person and I said
if it wouldn't be for my brother there would be no ounce of anger coming
out of me he says has that ever occurred to you that maybe I use your brother to
reveal to you that I see the anger in you everyday you don't see it therefore
you don't deal it and I want to show it to you but you can't even receive what I'm
showing you because you're blaming it on somebody who bumped into you how could
you see any other way if I wouldn't let him bump into you
you can't fix someone until you acknowledge the fact that the water they
came out of the cup is not their fault now they have a fault they should be
careful not to keep bumping but you should also empty your cup you should
also deal with the issues that are inside of you comon somebody are you
with me I want you to see what Jesus Christ said he said to people who want
to go fix everybody I want you to see what he says in Matthew chapter 7 is he
says that before you go about he says why do you look at the speck in your
brother's eye and do not consider the plank in your own eye how can you say to
your brother let me remove the speck out of your eye and look there's a plank in
your own eye hypocrite first remove the plank out of your own eye and then you
will see clearly how to remove the speck out of your brother's eye Jesus is
saying in fact is if you keep blaming the other brother or your wife for the
fact that the water came out Jesus you know what honestly why don't you first
clean up the cup make it empty and if your brother sister wife husband
bumps into you he says we can deal with the bump because we don't have the water
being splashed many of us we blame our reaction on the action of someone else
in reality your reaction is a result of your character not whoever bumped into
you in order to help someone with their spiritual problem we have to first be
watchful that we are taking care and we are owning up to the issues that are
surfacing in our heart because of their problem are you with me you know I
did not know how impatient I was and how controllive was until my wife did not
want to pray as I prayed she's supposed to be like me she's supposed to pray
like me and I was trying to share really I said I was trying to pull that flower
instead of water that flower and she wasn't growing she was dying because of
that and I thought that it was just a spiritual issue it was a spiritual issue
and I wasn't helping are you with me thank you Eric so much it will dry up
don't worry appreciate your help when people came to stone a woman with an
issue of blood I had a person who volunteered they wanted me to use them
as a Goliath do you want to I'm just kidding
woman was caught in the act of adultery which is interesting too because in
order to have an adultery you have to have a man the men never made it to the
stoning I think the man was one of the Pharisees reported a woman and he
himself picked up the stone besides the point people gathered together with
stones and they decided to throw stones on this woman to help her of course you
know to get her out of the society and everything and Jesus came alongside I
want to show you something every time you want to help someone with their
problem who you're married to your opinion your advice your insight could
come out as this cold hard and actually painful ask job's friends they didn't
want a hurt job when they shared their insight and what jobs problem was do you
think they came around they just want to like hurt job no they wanted to help
job but somehow you know job was hurt by their advice why because anytime you
give this before you get this even if what you're saying is correct it will
hurt people because it will be projected in the tone of your voice in the tone of
your attitude your words will be correct but they're cold they're hard and that's
what Jesus said hey guys on first of all you're aiming at the wrong person this
belongs in Goliath's head you're about to throw at the woman's head wrong head
before you start throwing stones why don't you pick up a mirror and start
remembering what you came from remember that when you sinned God didn't throw a
stone from heaven but had mercy on you before you go in fixing someone else and
you know how they should get fixed and how they should change why don't you
pick a mirror and just look at the fact that one is magnifying glass okay why
don't you
make sure you pick up the right mirror
why don't you look at the fact that and remember and how God delivered you from
drugs how God delivered you from from that depression how God delivered you
from that spirit of tradition how you wrestled how you struggled how other
people showed you mercy or how people didn't show you mercy and how it really
hurt and when you looked in a mirror then you look at your spouse you look at
your family member who's currently struggle it's crazy how this hard true
advice becomes graced with grace mercy and patience and you'd no longer condone
their issue where you come around with the spirit of gentleness the spirit of
grace spirit of patience spirit of long-suffering spirit of love and
kindness you come around and you actually end up helping them instead of
hurting them are you with me for those of you who are carrying a lot of stones
and you became and crazy-amazing stone hitters I ask you today that you stopped
throwing stones and you pick up a mirror and you take a good look at what God has
done in your past because it will surface mercy in you grace in you you
know one of the reasons why David was not judgmental and he didn't come
trashing his brothers trashing Saul is because David remembered if it
wouldn't be for the grace of God he would have been a lion's lunch if it
wouldn't be for the grace of God he would have been a bear's lunch it's
only God who helped him to overcome the bear and the lion it wasn't David
slickness it's not David's own strength and power and so he's looking at the
Goliath he says guys I know you're struggling I know what it's like I've
been there and I'm going to help you and that helped actually proved to be
helpful to his brothers they were not eventually offended they rallied around
him because a man who fought his lions becomes anointed to help others with
their giants amen