much like other people I was extremely skeptical about 12-step programs (Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous) but in
this video I'm gonna talk to you about my experience and why I decided to work
one what is up everybody this is Chris from the rewired salt where we talk
about the problem but focus on the solution and welcome back to another
week where I take a subject about mental health and I dive deep into it to help
better educate you and help you out with your own mental health this week I'm
going to be focusing not only addiction but 12-step programs in particular and
here's why there are a lot of people and I was one of them who are very
misinformed about 12-step programs they think all these things yet they've never
fully tried to even consider that they might be wrong about the situation
there's a lot of misinformation so please do me a favor even if you're not
an addict or alcoholic in recovery or trying to get clean please share this
video addiction affects one out of every 12
people which means there is almost a 100% chance that if you know at least 12
people you know an addict or alcoholic so please do me a favor and watch and
share these videos so you can be better educated and maybe help somebody's life
so the first disclaimer that I have to throw out there which I might put on all
these videos this week is I am NOT a representative of any 12-step program
I'm not a spoke person I don't know anything more than anybody else I am
merely here to share my experience okay okay so my first little bout with
12-step program was through Alcoholics Anonymous all right many years ago about
eight or nine years ago by a baby mama threatened to leave me and she said look
you're either going to a 12-step program or I'm leaving you so just to shut her
up I went to AAA and when I say this when I talk about this first time with
AAA I usually use air quotes and say I tried AAA
because I didn't try anything as soon as I pulled up it was in a church parking
lot and just like the brakes of my head where what like I immediately thought
that this was a bunch of religious fanatics we're gonna try to shove Jesus
down my throat and growing up here in Las Vegas I grew up around a lot of
Mormons who were always trying to like get me to convert and that
me and stuff I'm like nah I hate about that life so basically what I did I went
to these meetings for three months just sat there stared at the clock zoned out
didn't do anything so that's why I say I tried it I didn't really try anything I
just sat there on June 23rd 2012 that's my clean date and I had to go to
12-step meetings part of the sober living program I was in was I had to go
to five meetings a week so I was so skeptical about these meetings and I
can't emphasize that enough see if you're like me I saw that people who
just walked into a 12-step meeting they were like hey you know what like I'm
ready to get clean I'm ready to fully embrace these 12-step programs like
that's not how it was and I couldn't be further from that like I was so
skeptical I thought it was religious I still thought that they were a cult I'm
like why do I need to read this book why do I need a sponsor why are you telling
me I need a higher power I don't even believe in God what is all this nonsense
but I'm a very analytical person so I decided to analyze the situation and see
what's going on so I started going to these meetings and for three months
three months I didn't do anything I often tell my clients who I work with
like I'm never gonna pester you to get a sponsor because I sat around and did
nothing but listen for three months I was so skeptical that I just want to
watch I just wanted to watch people and see what their experience was and see if
this is something maybe I should do something that makes me laugh to this
day is that people think they're so unique like people in general but
addicts and alcoholics oh I know I'm different I'm different I don't need
this I'm different I'm different right now in these meetings you can have
dozens of people or hundreds of people and you can divide them into two groups
- not fifty just two groups this is what I saw from gathering the data after
three months of just sitting there I saw that there were just two groups of
people okay so in group number one we'll call this the happy group okay everybody
in group number one not only were they happy but they were sober and they were
sane and here's the thing like I was so out of my mind when I first got clean
like these people had this calm about them right
it didn't seem like their brain was going a million miles a minute it didn't
seemed like they were hating their life it didn't seem like they were talking
down to themselves costly these are all the things that I was struggling with I
felt like a crazy person I'm sitting how am i how are you doing this the other
thing that baffled me about their happiness was their happiness was
independent of circumstances here's what I mean by that you could have one person
in there who's like a lawyer making like six figures a year and then you can have
somebody who's like a McDonald's drive-thru employee and they're both
equally as happy and that blew my mind because I lived an entire life thinking
that in order to be happy you needed stuff you needed the house you needed
the cars you need the vacations you needed the big-screen TV the video game
systems the nights furniture you needed all these things but how did you have
somebody who's way up here financially and someone who's down here financially
but they're both equally is happy like that's something that I wanted and let
me tell you this too I went to plenty of meetings where homeless people were
going in there to get sober and stay sober and some of them were happier than
I was and I really had to sit back and reevaluate my life and say Chris is
pretty messed up when a homeless person is happier than you are
so that's group number one now let's take a look at group number two and
we'll do a little sad emoji right there okay so these people there was kind of
three different types of people in this group the first one is something that we
call the dry drunk what's a dry drunk a dry drunk is
somebody who's sober but they're still miserable like I remember hearing people
sharing they're like yeah you know like my kids were kind of a pain in the bud
today my wife's making me mad I hate my job but you know I'm like three years
sober so that's cool and I'm sitting there I'm like what are you talking
about like I kind of made a deal with myself very early on I said if I'm gonna
be miserable I'm gonna be miserable drunk at high like I wouldn't do this
thing if I was gonna stay miserable okay so that's the first person in the
bad group the next person I call these people the revolving door people right
you see these people come back into a meeting just crying and shedding tears
and just angry with themselves and situations and stuff like that because
they keep relapsing they keep coming in and out in and out in and out and the
last group of people I'm gonna put a little question mark
it was like where where do they go some of these people who knows maybe they
didn't like it and they never came back I don't know what happened to them but
it didn't take long for me to get involved in these meetings to say hey
we're so-and-so and they're like oh they died I'm like oh okay
right so now I'm sitting back I've gathered my data I've divided everybody
in these two groups what is the difference what is the difference
between these two groups so the first group the happy group they all said the
same thing okay they said I'd go to meetings I have a sponsor I have a
support group and I worked the steps every single one of them said that every
single one I was waiting for one of these people in group number one to be
like hey I don't do anything and my life's incredible but I never heard it
then there's group number two right the second group I don't think I really want
to be in that group well what are they doing what is wrong over here
what are these dry drunks doing one of these people coming in and out they
always said the same thing I don't go to meetings I don't have a sponsor I don't
work the steps I don't have a support group they all said the same thing I'm
saying I'm like okay there's this happy group happy sane and sober then this
group this group over here who's legitimately miserable or dead right
like and here's the thing whenever somebody relapsed I listened very
carefully like one of the best ways to stay clean is to learn from other
people's mistakes and the people who relapse always said the same thing they
never got the sponsor they never worked the steps they weren't going to enough
meetings all sorts of things right and here's the thing in my groups at my
rehab I often say it's almost like a magic trick that I don't even plan out
when I share this in groups I say can anybody relate to what I just said and
you always see hands go up there are countless people who come back to
treatment who were doing well for years they were doing well for years but they
stopped doing what they were doing before and then led to a relapse and
that's something that I remember every single day you gotta understand I'm
coming up on six years sober I have met people with 10 15 20 years sober my
treatment center listen very carefully I'm like what
happened what happened and they say the same thing I stopped doing what I
learned how to do and I'm like okay so like I said like I will let all of you
do the same thing like if you don't have faith in these programs if you think
they're full of crap if you think they're religious cults do what I did
don't do anything just go there listen and observe and I promise I promise you
that you will see the exact same two groups that I saw in fact let's do this
I know I got a bunch of people in recovery who subscribe to my channel
leave comments down below let me know let me know your experience did this
happen to you did this lead to a relapse or do you see this a lot is it the same
set of things that leads people back out or keeps them miserable let me know down
in the comments anyways again like I said please share this video I really
just want to educate people about these programs because they're free 3 ok so
there's a lot of misinformation that is potentially keeping people away from
something that might save their lives alright but if you like this video
please give it a thumbs up and if you are new here I'm always making videos to
help you out with your mental and emotional well-being click that little
round subscribe button and if you want to check out some other videos I've made
about addiction boom I've put an entire playlist right there called ask an
addict check it out alright thank you so so much for watching go check out some
meetings and I'll see you next time