Nnnoooo-I wasn't going to actually do an intro for this one.
'Cus I want to make a joke out of it and I almost just instinctively did it anyway.
*Burp*
*Intro music*
Wh-why am I so yellow?
*Wapsssh* Top of the mornin' to ya laddies, my name is Jackse-uuggghhh
*voice cracks and dolphin calls*
Calling all the dolphins!
Turn off the yellow light. *Giggles*
*Euughh*
I should pee before I do anything.
*Uuuughh* That's the sound of me dying.
Dying to play some video games.
It's still like-my skin is-!
I look like a fucking ghost!
There's a green hair on my mic.
It's-it's not mine I swear.
*Blows raspberries*
Bap-ba-Bap
Bada-ba-ba-da
*In a deep voice* Hey.
How's it going?
Aww-yeah.
*Quietly* God I need a haircut.
Ohhh stop it hair, it's so grooossss looking
Oh whatever.
*Wapsssh* Oh wait, I didn't sync...
Right, left, right, left.
Right left, right left. Red green, red green,
Red green, red green
Green green green green, my hair is green.
Fuck every other colour, green hair, green hair.
Yeaaaa. *Giggling*
*Wapsssh* Top of the mornin' to ya laddies, my name is Ja-
Uhhuugh-
Whooha-
AHHHHHHHHHH!
*Mumbling* I really need to warm up my fuckin' voice before I do these things.
But I don't have time!
*Wapsssh* Top of the mornin' to ya laddies, my name is-
Euhhhh-
Eughhhhh!
*groan descending into dolphin calls*
YEA- Ahaha, keep going! Nice! *laughing*
*Music cuts*
Ah the music cut out- Why?
*Computer fan fills silence*
Is it supposed to cut out? Did I break it?
Did I break something? I feel like I mighta broken something.
NOISE?!
Did I break something...?
Ohhhhhh-
Oh, I pulled cables and pulled out my mic.
Oops. I don't know which cable it is...
*Snazzy music*
I have blood on my neck!
Ah, the things for my ears, dammit!
I'm baaaack!
God, how do I start thi- What do I say?
BOOOOOO.
I'm scary!
*Sinister laughing*
Lo-lo-look at you all!
Just sitting there! Not worrying about anything...!
God, my hair is poofy.
You can't get rid of me.
*More sinister laughing*
And then we can cut to black,
And just have it-
*deep, demonic voice* Enjoy the show.
Oh, boy! I sure am a fun guy to hang around with!
Thanks man.
*Jack & Signe laughing*
Jack: You were right at it! Signe: I'm sooooorry!!
'Cause I don't know where it's gonna end me up, it could end me up in-
Fuckin' Wicklow, or it could end me up in the Lava Zone,
Fuckin' Robern, adding stuff to my Dropbox!
I appreciate it Robin, but I'm trynna record a video here!
*Jack & Signe laughing*
Jack: Oh, Bro Average indeed.
Jack: Oh, Bro Average indeed. *Signe laughing*
♪ My hair is messy, wish it really wasn't. ♪
♪ Everyone will look at it and say that I look... Stupid. ♪
*laughing* They won't really, but...
God, what did I do?!
*Awkward laughing*
*Wapssh* Top of the mornin' to ye laddies, my name is JackSepticEye and welcome back to-
Aeh- Oh god what's hap-
Welcome!-
Ah fuck-
*Begins Typing*
*Starts Typing Harder*
*bashes keyboard*
Bob: Ah- I've heard of that.
That's that no conditioner thats made with combutcher
and its called combetchener?
*Both Laugh*
Is it good?
*Sassily* I thought it was a- body wash.
Ohhh, good.
Jack: Its So-? Voice: Its Sal-?
*Laughter*
Jack: Ooooooh
I currently use conditioner that's made from the ground up
hooves of cows that were murdered for meat eaters?
just because I like to make sure that we don't waste resources.
*Giggles*
Jack: But I'm against the murdering of the cows. Bob: It makes my hair... Wade: Excuse me but it's the color of my looufa
Bob: Doesn't the soup make my hair smell like a farm, which I like.
Bob: But my boss says if I don't change it I'll lose my job at Jimmy John's. Jack: *Laughing*
Jack: Oh you're way to good at that.
Bob: Is the server up yet? Jack: Not yet Wade: Yup.
Jack: Can we fucking stop listening to his nonsense.
*Bob Laughing*
*Laughin* Whatever. Not a fucking model, just a YouTuber playing stupid video games in his bedroom.
Gotta pee.
Jus-Wait
*Quietly* Did you just click quit game? Is that what just happened? Did it just-did it?
I'm never gonna be able to play this game. *Laughing* I mean awesome video games don't treat me badly.
Shit I did it again.
Wade: Alright.
Bob: Wade couldn't even think of a new word he just split Jack's name in half. Jack: *Laughing*
Wade: Bob can you ever just be nice to me. Like two minutes, we haven't even started yet. Bob and Jack: *Laughing*
Bob: It just struck me, it was silly Wade: You know what now we've started and I want everyone to know the pain I've been as they watch this. Mark: *Laughing* I've been on your side this whole time. Jack: Awww
Mark: Woah, Garry's Mod just blacked out on me.
Mark: Woah. Bob: Wo-I-I made it in.
Wade: It likes to freeze before actually letting you in.
Wade: Garry's Mod always acts like it's crashing. Mark:Yeah but it's like all black.
Mark: It went black which is super weird,
Wade: That's racist but... it might work out
Bob: Is it gonna be able to go back. Jack: Yeah I was just gonna say, 'It's never gonna go back now.' All: *Laughing* Mark :Ohh yeah-yeah.
Bob: Got it in first.
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
That was a good one. *Laughing*
Ohh I'm getting lightheaded.
Dont ever-anyone fucking doubt Jack's yelling abilities.
♫ Do you ever feel like a piece of shit drifting through your life, fucking...cunts ♫
*Laughing* I don't know.
♫Singing along with music, Imitating the bass parts♫ *Laughing*
*Clapping along with music* You feeling it? *Continues clapping*
Wade:What, why are you guys maps not installed?
Mark: I don't know I downloaded them. Jack: I don't know. Bob: Wow Mark left.
Wade: Yeah like Mark's talking from the bathroom. Mark: No I crouched down cause my knees hurt. Jack: *Mumbling with hand over mouth*
Wade: Whatever you say Mark. Bob: Are you standing?
Mark: I do the standing thing.
Bob: Oh did you get one of those standing desk? Did you take the 360 across to the Sunset South and hit that Ikea that's on Buena Vista. Mark: I've had for a...
Mark: That doesn't make any sense! Jack: *laugh-talking*Buena Vista! Wade: Buena Vista...
Mark: As a resident LA-ian, I'm offended!
Bob: Or-or did you go to that new furniture store that's like an Ikea competitor that's on El Rancho Huevos?
Mark: THERE'S NO SUCH THING!
*hic* Ughh
I got sick in my mouth and I had to swallow it again. It's okay, I'm fine.
*Laughing* That's fucking disgusting.
Okay (x6)
G-Force Experience isn't on-or I mean G-Force Shadowplay. Oh I'm so silly.
Preparing to share your gameplay-now it's turning on. There it is.
Hey boo. Hows-how you doing? Why the fuck weren't you on before.
Well that does it for this video on...I forgot the name of the game.
*Quitely* Helping Hand...OKAY THAT DOES IT FOR THIS VIdeo On Helping Hand. I forgot the name of the game there for asecond.
I was too caught up in my-my finger!
*Outro*
Daddy's been drinking.
Half a beer. That's-that's how much daddy's been drinking.