How's it going bros!
My name is PewDiePie.....
And welcome to the future!!!!
[intensemusic]
Alright, let's enter the job simulator.
Here we go!
Oh my god!
I got hands!
*pewdiepiedoingthedirty
What can I do?
OH!
I got to wash my hands, right?
Make them nice and moist.
[love that sound]
This sound is not new to me.
Can I wash myself?
Gotta shower.
This is how homeless people shower.
I saw it once.
*gulping sounds*
Oh, VR water tastes so nice!
Can I drink the soap?
....
Disco. Alright.
*those moves Pewdiepie wow*
Holy shit it- OW!
Job Bot: We'll start by making some breakfast.
Turn on the grill and let's get fryin'.
Pewds: Alright, let's turn on the grill!
Ok.
Job Bot: Even though humans spend the entire night in a state of low power consumption, they still requi-
Shut up.
Alright, time to cook bacon and eggs!
How do I do it?
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Oh my god, what the fuck? This is freaking me out.
Alright, fuck it. Let's cook the bacon.
Oh that one is getting pretty well done
Oh shi- oh fuck.
Well done!
Shut the fuck up! Hehe.
Job Bot: -put it on the plate and you can ring the bell to send it out to the restaurant.
Pewds: Yeah, I'll send it out all right. *smears it over his buttocks*
*smears it over his buttocks*
Alright, we got an egg coming up.
We have some...... some bacon.
We gotta put it on a plate.
What is this? A fucking restaurant?
[bell tings beautifully]
DONE!
ENJOY YOUR FUCKING MEAL!
Bitch.
Oh, ok. We got another order. Alright, what is this?
SMOOTHIE.
What is this? A fucking fruit place?
WHO IN THE FUCK ORDERED A SMOOTHIE AT MY RESTAURANT?!
GET A FUCKIN'..... JOB!
Like I.
Why you lookin' at me?
OH GOD. it's, the, it's... on fire.
Hey!
Go back to work.
I fucked your mom.
She was a wide screen if you know what I mean.
[clicks tongue]
Ha Ha!
Alright, let's make a smoothie!
I feel good! I feel good about this job!
Alright, where's the blender?
Ok, let's set it to "blender".
OH SHIT! THAT'S FUCKING COOL!
Oh my god.
Can I blend my face?
Oh my god.
Should I do it, bros?
Ooooooooohh!
AHHHHHHHHH!
Oh, this is freaky, man!
[cute upbeat music in background while blender whirls]
Where am I?
Alright, let's put you in there.
And some carrots.
And, let's put some...
[grunts to take a shit]
[grunts forcefully]
Alright, let's put that in there as well.
And there we go!
This is fucking awesome. I am the best restaurant place, or I-- Who ordered a smoothie?
Hey!
Yours?
[bell tings]
Take my fucking smoothie and take your fucking asshole with it.
God damn, it's so much work.
Alright, what? A tea?
Tea... Alright, fuck it.
Alright! Come on! I got a job to do! Fuck me..
Ah, ok water. There it is.
Put it on the fucking stove.
Ah, Jesus Christ. It's hard being.. It's hard being a hard working man!
Isn't that right, Flowey?
Add some extra flavour, how about that?
Jesus Christ, we have to fucking do everything.
Alright, we got some crumpets.
Ah, FUCKS SAKE!
GOD DAMMIT!
IM TRYING TO RUN A DAMN BUSINESS HERE!
Would you eat this?!
WOULD YOU EAT THIS?!
[kettle steaming]
I hate my fucking job.
I wish I could just go back to YouTube. (like, right now?)
Play fucking games all day.
[crunch]
Yup. That's ready to go.
[bell tings]
[Pewds laughs]
Oooh.
Ohhh.
[glugging noise]
[Pewds chugs, making a strange ass sound]
Ah, that's a good one. Let's add that.
I'm gonna make grandma's soup!
It's called a little fucking... thing of... bit of everything.
YEAHHHH. That should do it.
Add a little bit of extra spice.
My favourite. Oooh, a spicy sauce!
Put it on my nips.
Oh, that's right.
There it is!
Yesss.
Ahhhh, YES!
Served!
[bell tings] BITCH!
Enjoy, motherfucker!
Your asshole might burn a bit tomorrow, but it's all going to be worth it.
Job Bot: Humans refer to this as a sandwich.
Pewds: Ah, for fucks sake.
Alright, sandwich time.
Yes. Potato. Raw?! Fucks sake, I ate it!
This is going to be one fucking nice sandwich.
Pretzel.
Okay.
This is gonna be the greatest fucking sandwich of all time.
The fuck is THIS?!
AMATEURS!
AMATEURS! I CAN'T WORK IN THIS KITCHEN!
GOD DAMMIT!
FUCK YOU!
Let's add some salt.
Let's not forget...
The olive.
[kisses]
I call it the Eiffel Tower.
Hey, who wants a sandwich?
[nom nom nom]
[Pewds's robot character vomits]
[pewds mimics and vomits with it]
MORE. That was delicious!
[both vomit again] (into the pot too, WITH FLAVOR!)
I'll puke in your fucking face, you French son of a bitch.
[both vomit... again] (into a robot's face, WITH FLAVOR!)
[sizzling]
That looks just like a penis.
Ah, SHIT!
What? YOU KIDS DON'T LIKE MY FOOD?!
I call this one "PewDiePie de la crème"
EAT IT.
WHAT'S YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM?!
GOD DAMMIT, I HATE MY LIFE!
I'M GOING TO END IT.
I'M GOING TO END IT!
I'M GOING TO END MYSELF!
YOU DON'T EVEN CARE!
AHHHHHH
hey..
AHHHHHH
Oh..
Oh, oh, oh, ohhhhhhh.
ugh..
[chugging sound]
[glugging noise]
SUBSCRIBE.
[pants]
Alright! Well thank you bros for watching this video!
If you want more virtual reality videos like this one, leave a like.
And as always, [kisses fist] virtual brofist!
The fuck are you doing?
[guy recording laughs]
Why did it take you so long to [can't finish and laughs]
(Subtitles by Markiplier)
*BROFIST!*