- All right. Pull your shirt back.
Let me fix your hair. - Oh my God. Okay.
All right, All right. - Mmkay.
(playful music)
- I think she's gonna think I'm super dorky
or it's super weird
or she's not gonna wanna know anything about it.
- A relationship I had that started
before I had Alex, but...
May or may not have continued after Alex.
- She's probably gonna be really grossed out.
- Well, I hope she'll be a little bit surprised.
It is maybe something a little out of character
from what she might think about me.
(playful music)
- Your dad was my first.
- I thought it was one of your boyfriends
with, like, the cool name that you'd never forget.
- No, no, no, no. - No? Interesting.
- No, no, it was you dad,
and we were in New York and we were in a discotheque.
- In the disco?
- In the discotheque.
Everybody did that back then. - Oh, okay.
Well, I guess.
- It was...
Everybody met up in the women's bathroom.
- Every, wait, every... - Ugh, that was...
I should've never told you that.
Oh my God.
Can we just forget that?
Never gonna forget that.
(laughs)
- You know how after I had your brother
I was in a bad accident scene? - Mmhmm (affirmative).
- It was before you were born.
- Yeah.
- And I had to have a knee transplant.
They had this huge screw in my knee,
and so when I got pregnant with you
for some reason, I should've known better,
the screw started to come undone.
When I gave birth to you,
it was either the screw comes out first
or you come out first.
The screw came out first,
and I've kept it all these years.
And I haven't looked at it since,
so it's been many, many years.
So I brought it for you today.
- That's disgusting.
I don't know if I wanna see that.
- Anyway. - Oh my God.
- It's even in the same container.
- Let's keep it in that container.
- You know we're gonna take it out.
- [Jen] (laughs) I know.
[Jen] I don't wanna touch it. - I want you to see this is
this is the biggest...
- [Jen] That was in your body.
- This was in my body.
This is a nice size screw.
Here, touch it.
- No, thank you. No, no.
I'm good.
- I love you still, though.
- [Jen] Good. - Just so you know.
- I love you too, mom.
- Okay.
- I once got fired for using the computer, the Internet,
at work actually to look for another job.
- Wow. That's a new bit of information.
- I did look, you know, periodically at work
on the net for another job.
And he called me one day and said,
"You know, if you don't wanna work here, that's fine.
"You're fired."
(Andrea laughs)
- I never knew he was fired from anything.
- You know that I was married before
I married your dad.
You also know that my ex had a daughter.
You did get to meet her once.
- Okay.
- But what you didn't know
is I actually maintained a very close relationship with her.
When she was little, I used to take her to Disneyland.
- What!
- Every year on her birthday.
And when I was splitting up with her father,
she said that she was very upset.
She was young and she said, "Does this mean
"you won't take me to Disneyland on my birthday?"
And I said, "No, I will keep taking you to Disneyland."
- What!
- Were you ever gonna tell me?
- Probably not if this hadn't come up.
(laughs)
(playful music)
- This kind of makes me happy,
because I've never been fired from anything before.
And now I know that my dad has been,
and I think it's really funny.
- A singular emotion.
Flabbergasted.
- I think that people should tell each other everything.
I think that it creates a healthy relationship.
- How 'bout if we call Kimmy
and the three of us go to Disneyland?
- Yeah, let's go.
- All right.
- I'm gonna take you up on that.
- 'Kay, but it has to be on a weekday
'cause I hate crowds and lines.