Sure, Gordon Ramsey is well known as a chef, a super-high-end chef even, but beyond all
that he's mostly known as that chef that has meltdowns and insults lesser cooks with insults
like "Stupid Donkeys" or "Cows" (really any barnyard animal).
And while his years on TV have reduced him to something of a caricature, there are still
some rants that stand out above others in terms of their severity and that makes you
wonder just why chefs subject themselves to the psychological and emotional trauma working
in one of his (televised) kitchens.
So, let's take a look at the most infamous, and terrifying, Ramsay Rants that exist forever
on the Internet thanks to the glory of YouTube.
The Pumpkin Risotto Incident
It's clear that Ramsay has a certain level of loathing for people in his kitchen but
that's nothing as compared to what happens to customers who are in the wrong and attempt
to cop an attitude.
That was the case during the Pumpkin Rissoto Meltdown during an episode of Hell's Kitchen,
when a customer complained that he hadn't gotten enough pumpkin in his pumpkin risotto.
While Ramsay does appear to at least at first attempt to adhere to the old “The Customer
is Always Right" adage, he quickly abandons it after it's clear that the "Customer" here
is being rude and asking for way too much.
That's when Ramsay says what even for him, is a savage, savage burn worthy of calling
in the paramedics that are there for each taping by saying "I'll give you some pumpkin
and I'll ram it right up your... expletive, expletive".
That's one Yelp review I'd love to read.
Breasts on a Hot-Plate
Ramsay is known for being tough on his chefs regardless of whether or not they're male
or female and while he does insult people based on their appearances, it's not a disproportionately
sexual thing when it comes to women over men.
Perhaps this guest would've been better off knowing that during a filming of Hell's Kitchen
years ago during which she not only approached the window at the pass but also ignored Ramsay's
polite request for ... really anything.
In this case, the woman approached the window wearing a low-cut top and Ramsay asked for
30-seconds to finish something before he could put his undivided attention on her...
Issue(s).
Because she ignored him, Ramsay basically thought of the most entertaining way to get
rid of her as possible and it clearly enraged the woman, who not only flipped over a plate
of food onto a tray but then pushed that tray towards Ramsay.
They Could Mate, I Guess?
While Ramsay has shown that he loves to insult rude guests, especially rude guests that refuse
to walk away from the window while he's working, he does save a lot of his best insults or
rants for the people inside of his kitchen.
While some people believe that Ramsay is bullying those around him, part of what Ramsay is doing
is making sure that the people he's willing to entrust with his restaurant are mentally
tough enough to handle some abuse, wherever it’s coming from.
So, while some of these burns are rough they're also necessary at least in the mind of Ramsay.
Beyond that, he's not often wrong either, which helps with his charm.
So when he was served this "Salmon" at the pass during a taping of Hell's Kitchen, his
comparison to another animal, or at least PART of another animal, should make you realize
that perhaps it's not the best idea to submit that application for next season's cast of
Hell's Kitchen...
That is unless you're a really big fan of Bison.
CANCEL THE MUSIC JUSTIN!
While Ramsay is tough on the chefs on Hell's Kitchen and even tougher on bad customers,
you'll notice a marked difference in his tone on one of his other shows, Kitchen Nightmares.
This is a show in which he visits failing restaurants and tries to fix things before
it's too late.
While he seems a lot more muted and compassionate on that program, he's still Gordon Ramsay
so that facade can only last so long.
A perfect scene from Kitchen Nightmares that shows that different, but waning, tone is
from an episode in which he was attempting to explain to a restaurant owner that perhaps
he shouldn't force his customers to listen to his band during meals with their friends
and families.
The problem he came across, was that owner Justin clearly wanted to be a rock-star more
than a restauranteur, and because of that, both dreams were failing.
It's as if you can almost see Ramsay come to the conclusion that he was wasting his
time because Justin just wasn't getting it.
You French Pig!
It’s clear that Ramsay’s pity for the struggling restauranteurs he tries to help
on Kitchen Nightmares only really goes so far.
That much was made clear during one of the more contentious confrontations in the history
of a show that's full of contentious confrontations.
Now, Ramsay has won nearly 20 Michelin stars (or at least his restaurants have) so when
someone tries to throw a "Best Chef in XYZ County" award in his face, you just know that
that's going to set him off.
Which it does in this case, and while this doesn't get to blows there's an awful lot
of literal finger-pointing on Ramsay's end as well as some epic digs.
Also, as an American who is used to hearing nothing but "BEEP You Stupid BEEPing Cow"
while watching these shows, these may seem harsher than usual, as well.
But regardless of how you slice it, "French Pig" is well, kinda funny.
Jack's Kitchen Inspection
Sometimes it's hard to tell on Kitchen Nightmares what's going on behind the scenes, or why
Ramsay may be going a bit harder at a certain restaurant owner than another, but if you've
watched the full-episode of Kitchen Nightmares that focused on Jack's Waterfront in small-town
Michigan, you'll see just why Ramsay is so apoplectic.
First is the fact that AJ, the older guy in the video, is rubbing it in his (and everyone's)
face that he's got 40-years in the business and while it's clear that that's his defense
mechanism, it's also clear that Ramsay's had enough of AJ's attitude regardless of what
he does to justify that his end of the house (the kitchen, the kitchen's freezer) is a
complete mess.
Beyond that, it's clear that the owner (Scott) was putting far too much trust (and money)
in AJ, so that's something that infuriates Ramsay as someone who invests millions in
restaurants himself.
Sadly but appropriately, Jack's Waterfront is no longer in business.
Perhaps people didn't want to stop in after seeing that the Risotto they had for dinner
could've been used to stucco the outside of their house.
The Non-Stick Pan
Considering that Ramsay is known as the screaming chef, you'd be surprised to hear that his
voice ever gives out (since it appears that angrily yelling is basically his default speaking
tone).
But, if you've watched a lot of Ramsay on television you'll know that really his voice
is just a direct barometer of how he genuinely feels.
While that's clear enough in basically every clip of Ramsay online, the best example isn't
actually of him screaming or even tearing up, but rather when his voice is giving up
on him just like his brain is giving up on the chef during the infamous "Non-Stick" line
that actually broke Ramsay's vocal chords and spirits.
The chef in question apparently had never heard of non-stick cookware and was turning
over her scallops too often, as she was afraid they'd stick.
You can tell by Ramsay's tone that that chef didn't make it much longer in the show and
it's probably better for everyone that she didn't (as long as she's not back at home,
manufacturing anti-lock brakes now).
The Toilet Brush
If this has shown you anything it's that Ramsay is a master of insulting people.
So while his insults are highly based on the personal appearance of the person he's attacking,
Ramsay is known in the kitchen for adding new flair to old classics and he tends to
do that while insulting people from time to time as well.
No better example of this exists than his rapid-fire insult attack on a group of new
chefs on Hell's Kitchen during the first episode of season four.
Ramsay had seen enough and decided to see if any of the men were willing to stand up
and essentially insulted his way through all the men with knee-slapper after knee-slapper
before he finished by comparing the hair and apparent tendency of one of the chefs to "run
around" to that of a toilet brush.
While that may not have been his best, it's definitely a thinker, and it gets grosser
with age.
Hey, just like a toilet brush!
WHERE’S THE LAMB SAUCE
Sometimes Ramsay can’t keep his insults to one area, and what results is a word salad
of invectives.
No better example of that exists than an episode of Hell's Kitchen in which Ramsay apparently
really, really wanted some lamb sauce, and while he did receive that sauce, he wasn't
too pleased by the timing or the person who brought it to him as what followed was essentially
the meanest 12 consecutive words ever spoken on TV, the Internet, or in the English language:
"Now fuck off you fat useless sack of yankee-dandee doodle shit".
That one pretty much explains itself.
"I'm Not Dickface, Chef”
We’ve learned a lot here today, but here’s our final lesson on working with Gordon Ramsay:
if you’re going to stand up to him, you better make sure you’re in the right.
When a chef screwed up the special on what appeared to be one of the more important nights
on the season of Hell’s Kitchen, Ramsay referred to him as "Dickface" to another chef
who was running the kitchen.
When Ramsay told that chef to fix it, the chef who had screwed up said that he would
but that he wasn't "Dickface".
What followed was the most angry we've ever seen Ramsay and to be honest, it was so bad
that it even scared us a little.
So, do yourself a favor, if you're ever cooking for Ramsay and he calls you a silly name,
just let it slide.
It'll be better, for all of us, including Ramsay, who must be tired of yelling at this
point.
No insults from us.
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