your punishment's very easy.
All you got to do is sell this beautiful turquoise ring.
Yeah.
We got you dressed up in your Sunday finest.
You're gonna go into your office
and just make some cold calls and sell this ring.
Yeah.
till it's sold.
[ Laughter ]
Oh, you got to be [bleep] me.
Joe: There she is -- the jewel.
Nobody's going to buy that.
It is hot!
Oh, wait. You guys are cold?
[ Lamps buzzing ]
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
It got like 100 degrees hotter immediately!
What is this?!
Gentlemen, I hate to point this out,
but it's only gonna get hotter in the room.
You better get to work.
Murr: This is smart -- they're calling Manhattan.
Yep.
Uh...
Hurry up.
[ Dial tone ]
The dial tone comes up quick.
They can't think of numbers fast enough.
3-1-6-0.
They can't think of numbers fast enough.
It's ringing.
Do you want me to join in? I'll wait. I'll wait.
You bring me on as your manager.
[ Beeping ]
[ Laughter ]
Murr: It's a fax machine!
Oh, my God! This is gonna take hours.
Hi. This is Aidan.
Aidan, how are you? Oh, my God.
I'm so glad to talk to you. My name's Brian Quinn.
I'm calling from the Staten Island Turquoise Ring Company.
Listen to me.
We're -- The holidays are coming.
We're -- We're firing off these tur--
We're firing off these --
I'm gonna put my manager on.
Hi, Aidan. This is Sal Vulcano.
We are cold-calling turquoise rings today
for sale for the holidays.
That's okay. I'm really not interested.
Oh, but you haven't heard -- it's from the Philippines.
Why did I call him "Aides"?
Aidan? Aidan?
We lost Aidan.
Well, at least you got somebody on the phone, boys -- progress.
Por favor de...
[ Laughter ]
It's over 125.
Like, our flesh is expanding.
this is the pizzeria I used when I was a child.
are getting desperate.
Hey, Ambrosino's.
This is amazing.
This is Brian Quinn. I order from you guys all the time.
I'm on that TV show "Impractical Jokers."
Q, what's going on, buddy? How's everything?
Murr: Oh, my God!
This could work.
I have an overabundance
of turquoise rings,
that Ambrosino's Pizza
is my favorite pizza on Staten Island --
the best pizza, man. Great stuff.
Yeah, and I see you in here all the time. I know.
is Sal and I
came in the possession of a surplus of turquoise rings.
I'm unloading them for the low, low price of $19.99.
Mike, that's 1-9-9-niner.
Wow, that's a bargain.
it is.
And guess what -- we can deliver it.
We can deliver it today. We can deliver it to someone's house.
We can deliver it to someone's job.
office building.
Okay, okay, okay. Okay, okay.
We're just very happy,
'cause we've been trying to sell it all day, so...
Wait.
I'm the only guy that's bought -- that's buying on this?
All right, so, $19.99.
Oh, wait. Hold on. Listen. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold on.
'Cause now you got me a little wary here.
Yeah!
What could we do --
What could we do to prove to you that this is real, Mike?
why would I call this pizzeria
unless it was the Q that comes in there all the time?
Also, didn't you say what you always order?
I ordered a hot cherry pepper.
On top of that, I don't care whether I buy a dollar slice
or a $20 pizza --
I'm throwing money in that tip jar.
All right, Q, listen,
just 'cause you said the hot cherry pepper,
Yes!
Okay!
Oh, there they go.
Damn it!