-Well, the knives are out in the GOP
as Republicans begin to bicker with each other
and look for someone to blame
after their party collapsed in Tuesday's midterms
and Joe Biden had the best midterm showing
of any sitting president in 20 years.
Republicans and right-wing media
are blaming everything from voting machines
to young people, to women and, perhaps most shockingly,
they're really pissed at Donald Trump.
For more on this, it's time for "A Closer Look."
♪♪ [ Cheering and applause ]
You know, going into these midterms,
I was never nervous. I knew anything was possible.
I was bracing for the worst.
But one thing that made me feel better
was knowing that we had patriots out there,
making sure our elections were running smoothly.
Patriots like MyPillow CEO Mike Lindell,
[ Laughter ] who announced,
before the election, that his team
would be monitoring every race across the country for fraud
through his website, which has, as you would expect,
a ridiculous name --
frankspeech.com.
-We're going to be watching every race.
We're going to have the real-time crime desk going
at frankspeech.com.
[ Laughter ] Everybody can watch me there
tomorrow night.
We are tracking every race by cyber.
I want all the bad guys out there to know,
through the Edison Report, we are watching
and we also have another way to watch
what's going on with the computers and the machines,
so, I'm putting them all on notice, Steve.
They're all on notice.
-Hear that, bad guys?
[ Laughter ] You are on notice.
Mike Lindell is tracking every race by cyber.
[ Laughter ] Why is all of his computer lingo 30 years old?
[ As Lindell ] We're tracking the bad guys by cyber
and using AOL Instant Messenger to find out [ Laughter ]
their age/sex/location.
[ Laughter, cheering, and applause ]
Lindell always talks like he's being forced
to write a science fiction novel at gunpoint.
[ Laughter ] [ As Lindell ] But I, I don't know anything
about science fiction.
"Well, then I guess this is goodbye, Lindell."
[ As Lindell ] There were robots and machines
[ Laughter ] who were using cyber to be, uh, bad guys.
[ Laughter ] And mankind's only hope was
the Edison Project, led by the fearless astronaut
Frank Speech.
[ Laughter ]
So, Lindell said he was tracking every race through cyber.
He even said, during a livestream
on election night, when the host tried
to wrap things up, that he would stay there
and keep tracking votes all night.
-I think Mike is back. Mike, we were starting
to make up wrap-up comments for the evening.
What do you think?
-I didn't know we were wrapping up comments.
I got General Flynn coming on
and we got a video of Kari Lake 40 minutes ago.
-[ Laughs ] -I don't know if you guys --
I'm staying up all night 'til we win!
-I don't think it's great advertising
that a pillow salesman never seems to want to go to bed.
[ Laughter and applause ]
[ As Lindell ] I'm pulling a back-to-back all-nighter,
anything not to put my head on that lumpy sack of wrenches.
[ Laughter ]
They smell like burnt rubber.
[ Laughter ]
You won't be surprised to hear that, on Tuesday,
when it was clear the Democrats
had vastly outperformed expectations,
Republicans still had not taken control of the House or Senate,
as expected, Lindell let the world know
he had found the bad guys who did all the fraud and stuff.
By the way, see if you can follow any
of this completely incoherent word vomit.
-I want to bring in Mike Lindell.
Mike, you got some interesting results
you wanted to share. Go ahead.
-Yeah. Well, first of all,
when you guys were talking before,
I was listening to you.
Who attacked our country and what is this all about?
It's the CCP, the UNA party, the deep state, the globalists,
and, now, the Democrat Party joining with all of them.
Here's what we have.
In our real-time crime desk, if you have a graphic to put up,
I'm going to show you just one of them
and this is Herschel Walker here.
[ Laughter ] So, we're watching these races.
Vance was one. I believe, early on,
they were taking it, taking Vance,
and I think they just didn't put any injection
because he totally overran the algorithm.
We're watching these races and it's like real-time crime.
I call it a crime spike.
And then you get these crime spikes.
[ Laughter ] -Jesus, dude. Mike Lindell's
the only guy I can think of
who would get cut off at Starbucks.
[ Laughter ] "Sir, I think you've had
enough macchiatos. Let me call you a cab."
[ As Lindell ] No, thanks. I'll just fly home.
[ Laughter ]
Real-time crime line.
He's like McGruff, if someone put meth in his kibble.
[ Laughter ]
Here's a pretty good way to track how well
the Democrats are doing -- the better the night they have,
the more incoherent Mike Lindell gets.
In 2020, Lindell was like, "There's fraud in the machines."
Very simple. Now, the Republicans
and, specifically, Trump, have gotten crushed again,
he's spitting out and vomiting
a bunch of meaningless nonsense at lightning speed,
like an Amazon Echo that got dropped in the toilet.
[ Laughter ] Hey, Alexa,
can you give me an election update?
-China CCP, UNA party, global deep state, Dominion,
CIA voting machines hacked are cybercrime spike
through the real-time cybercrime cyberdesk.
Cyber, cyber, cyber, cyber,
[ Laughter ] cyber, cyber,
-Okay, okay, okay. Oh, and also,
who did the Dolphins beat this weekend?
-Da Bears.
[ Laughter and applause ]
[ Fresh laughter ]
-So, Lindell is blaming...
[ Laughter ]
...fraud, but many other right-wing pundits
are looking elsewhere for suspects.
On Fox News, for example, they're blaming the fact
that no one seems to hate Joe Biden.
-There's just not the hatred for Joe Biden
that there is for Barack Obama and for the Clintons.
There's not a Hate Biden vote that's out there.
You know, when you go, Trump's on the ballot,
there's that Hate Trump Democrat vote?
People just don't feel the same passion against the guy.
-I love watching it dawn on Fox News in real time
that the stuff they've been saying
for over two years is total bull[bleep].
[ Laughter ] It's like watching someone's face drop on "Love is Blind"
when the reveal happens and...
[ Laughter ]
...they realize they're not
into the person they're engaged to.
You dips spent two full years talking about impeaching Biden
and claiming he was actually, somehow,
the nefarious mastermind behind a shadowy plot
to flood the country with street gangs,
make America Communist,
indoctrinate our children with wokeism,
and turn the military into
a gender studies class at Bryn Mawr.
Nobody bought it.
Even the graphics you aired
to make him look scary
actually made him look cooler
than he was, like this one.
[ Laughter and applause ]
They mocked up with Biden eating ice cream
in front of a burning building.
That actually aired on Fox.
Biden doesn't look evil.
He looks like he just snarled,
"Get off my plane,"
before kicking Gary Oldman off Air Force One.
[ Laughter and applause ]
You don't have to like Biden to know he's not
some Chairman Mao-type revolutionary.
He's a 79-year-old man from Scranton
who takes the train to work
and, occasionally, gets stuck onstage
[ Laughter ] or trips on the stairs
to Air Force One
three times in a row!
[ Laughter and applause ]
Fox News viewers might hate Democrats,
but they are the age demographic that, when they see Biden,
they can't help but think,
[ Gruffly ] "Ah, he's one of us."
[ Laughter and applause ]
Fox News tries to make him a villain
when he'd make a far better spokesperson
in one of their commercials.
[ Laughter ]
But the stair video was actually a clue.
That should've been a sign, right there,
that Biden was better at this than we all thought.
Even when he falls, he falls up.
[ Laughter ] You know, if Trump had tripped on the stairs,
he would've somehow rolled all the way down to the Potomac,
where they'd have to fish him out using a pool scoop.
[ Laughter and applause ]
That was not the only reason, according to Fox,
for Biden's performance last night.
Apparently, it's also the fault
of people who live in cities, single women, and young voters.
-Single women are voting for Democrats by 30 points,
-37. -37 points!
-Yeah. -In urban America.
They're cleaning our clocks in the cities,
cleaning our clocks!
I'm not saying anything nefarious is going on,
but they are cleaning our clocks in the cities
[ Laughter ] and we're giving it away.
And the fact that these youth voters are coming in so strong
on an off-year is very concerning.
It looks like they've been brainwashed.
[ Laughter ] This new generation is totally brainwashed.
-Yeah, all these 25-year-old Gen Z TikTokers
have been totally brainwashed
by 79-year-old
[ Laughter and applause ] Joe Biden?
That's why the kids are all doing the Joe Biden Challenge,
where you try to eat an entire ice cream cone
before the burning house behind you melts it.
[ Laughter and applause ]
The dumbest part came later, when Watters pitched a solution
to Republicans' problems with single women --
just make the single women get married.
-Single women are breaking for Democrats by 30 points!
And this makes sense, when you think
about how Democrat policies are designed
to keep women single. [ Pats desk ]
[ Laughter ] But once women get married,
they vote Republican.
Married women, married men,
go for Republicans by double digits.
But single women, and voters under 40
have been captured by Democrats.
So, we need these ladies to get married.
[ Laughter and ohhs ] And it's time to fall in love
and just settle down. Guys... [ Pats desk ]
go put a ring on it.
[ Laughter and ohhs ] -I...doubt single women
are going to take advice from a guy
who looks like he'd walk up to you at a bar and ask,
"Did it hurt?" But then forget
"when you fell from heaven"
and scramble to finish the line, anyway.
[ As Watters ] Did it hurt?
"Did what hurt?"
You know, when you fell.
"Fell where?"
Uh...
up the stairs?
[ Laughter and applause ]
Also, dudes, let me give you all a little advice.
Just because you put a ring on it,
don't expect your spouse's opinions on politics --
or anything, for that matter --
to more closely align with yours.
I've been married for nine years and, mysteriously,
my wife still can't seem to find
any space in our apartment for my artwork.
Why do you think I still have all this [bleep] on my desk?
[ Laughter and applause ]
Because I'm not allowed to bring it home.
We have a perfectly good coffee table with nothing on it!
[ Laughter ] And yet, somehow there's no room
for my Andy Samberg "My doink fell off" mummy statue.
[ Laughter ]
Oh, but, yeah, I'm going to convince her
to listen to my political opinions.
She doesn't even watch the show
and, when I asked her why she doesn't watch, she said,
"Our TV doesn't get NBC."
[ Laughter ]
That can't be right.
[ Laughter ]
We have --
We have Peacock.
[ Laughter ]
By the way, Fox News
was not the only observer of Tuesday's midterms
who seems to have drawn the conclusion
that voters just don't hate Joe Biden that much.
Biden himself seems to have come away
with some renewed confidence, as he made clear
in a press conference at the White House yesterday,
where he was asked how he would change his presidency
going forward, based on the results,
and gave a very succinct answer.
-What, in the next two years, do you intend to do differently
to change people's opinion of the direction of the country,
particularly, as you contemplate a run for president in 2024?
-Nothing.
[ Laughter ] -My dude is feeling it!
I wouldn't have been shocked if, right after he said that,
Dr. Jill sped through on a Harley
and he just jumped on the back.
[ Laughter ]
Also, how great is it to have short answers
at a press conference after four years
of president Alphabet Soup over here?
[ Laughter ] If you asked Trump that same question, he'd say --
[ As Trump ] What am I going to do to change?
I'll tell you who should change --
the crooked Democrats because what they're doing,
they're ruining this country with the crime and the windmills
and the windmills committing crime.
[ Laughter ] Some people are saying the windmills are forming gangs
in New York City, now, subway gangs.
[ Laughter ] The windmills, they go in the subway
and they pick your pocket and it's easy for them
because, when you think about it,
they have three arms, you know?
[ Laughter ]
They wave at you with two
and then the other one grabs the wallet.
[ Laughter ] When you try to stop them,
they just blow you back with their wind.
[ Laughter ] So, when it comes to changes, if I'm being honest --
and I do want to wrap up this answer --
[ Laughter ] when it comes to changes,
I think the great David Bowie said it back --
"Turn and face the strange,
ch-ch-ch-ch-changes.
[ Laughter and applause ] Don't want to be a richer man,"
but of course I do, I do want to be a richer man,
So, on that point, David and I will have to agree to disagree.
[ Laughter and applause ] So, right-wing pundits cycled through every excuse
they could think of for their poor performance --
voting machines, young people, single women, cities --
but, eventually, they did land on one explanation
that seems more in the ballpark of reality -- Donald Trump.
Trump's clown car of bozos and doofuses
got creamed on Tuesday.
Pro-Trump weirdos running for House and Senate
got crushed, especially compared
to the more traditional Republican candidates
who've distanced themselves from Trump.
Even Lauren Boebert is struggling to hang on
in a safe Republican seat
that no one thought was competitive.
I'm not saying I was psyched
when I saw Boebert was in a tight race,
but when they flashed those numbers on election night,
I turned to my wife and said...
-I'm staying up all night, 'til we win!
[ Laughter and applause ]
And then she said,
"Take that mummy back to the office!"
[ Laughter ]
It's a conversation piece!
[ Laughter ]
And, sure enough, the knives are now out for Trump,
as the right-wing media that fueled his rise to stardom,
in the first place, turns on him,
including some of his longtime fanboys at Fox News.
-It looks like we're -- in all likelihood,
we could be at the status quo, a 50/50 Senate again.
If that happens, Donald Trump cost us the presiden--
the Senate twice in a row.
-Donald Trump's not going to like this,
but I got to tell you, the people I talk to,
they say, "We love Donald Trump.
We're so grateful that he beat Hillary Clinton.
We love his policies.
We think it's unfair, how the media's treated him.
It's unfair, what the Department of Justice has treated him.
But you know what?
We don't like all the drama.
We like Ron DeSantis."
That's what I hear.
-Does Trump win?
I hope so. I love the guy.
And, a week ago, I would've said slam dunk. [ Pats desk ]
But after how last night shook out, I don't know now.
Democrats will walk over hot coals to vote against Trump.
-So, going into 2024, the Republicans are going
to be looking for candidates who are focused on winning,
not just making a point or settling a score.
The populist movement is about ideas.
It is not about any one person.
If the voters conclude that you're putting
your own ego or your own grudges
ahead of what's good for the country,
they're going to look elsewhere, period.
-Trump is the past.
-Man, Republicans are running away from Trump faster
than Josh Hawley on January 6th.
[ Laughter and applause ]
These guys went from devoting themselves
to Trump for over six years
to suddenly tossing him overboard
in the span of 24 hours.
I got to say, it's fun to watch.
Fox News versus Trump is like "Alien vs. Predator"
or "Godzilla vs. Kong"
or Biden versus stairs.
[ Laughter ] Well, guess what.
He's not just going to magically go away,
especially after you spent six years slavishly supporting him.
He's Donald Trump. He's incapable
of keeping his mouth shut for longer than five seconds.
Dude can't even stand still.
Whenever he has to pose for a photo op,
he does that thing where he sways back and forth,
[ Laughter ] like a drunk guy on a cruise ship
that's caught in a storm.
[ Laughter ] The GOP might
suddenly want to cut ties with Trump,
but for Republicans, Donald Trump is like Jason --
nothing you can do stops him.
Plus, you know, he always looks like
he just drowned in a lake at a summer camp.
[ Laughter ] You guys created this monster
and, now, you're going to have to live with them.
You don't just get to wave it all away
and say stuff like this --
-Trump is the past.
-You wish he was! It's too late, mother[bleep]!
[ Laughter and applause ] You doinks could've helped
impeach and convict him and you probably would've been
riding high on a red tsunami Tuesday,
but, instead, you had to kiss the ring.
House GOP Leader Kevin McCarthy,
who hopes to be the next speaker,
if Republicans eke out a majority in the House,
even flew down to Mar-A-Lago for that photo op,
like two real estate agents who are trying to sell you
a house on haunted burial ground. [ Laughter ]
[ As Trump ] You have the ghosts and the ghouls.
We love the ghouls. [ Laughter ]
And the ghouls, they'll wail all night
and rattle their chains, but look at the high ceilings
and, you know, it's close to good schools and shopping.
[ Laughter ]
Voters, once again, repudiated the MAGA movement
and Trumpism on Tuesday,
just as they did in 2018 and 2020,
and now, suddenly, the same Republicans
who marched in lockstep behind Trump for six years,
wreaking havoc on the nation,
want to cut ties and run away from him as fast as they can.
The Trumpified GOP has alienated everyone from women
to suburban voters, to people in cities;
to young voters, who are especially hard to poll
because they don't answer phone calls.
They prefer to communicate...
-By cyber.
-This has been...
[ Laughter and applause ]
..."A Closer Look."
♪♪ [ Cheering and applause ]