Hi my name is Laura Cox, I am Shield HealthCare's Ostomy Lifestyle Specialist.
Today we're going to be talking about body image with an ostomy bag.
Having an ostomy definitely changes your perception of your own body
because not only did you have a disease that was life-threatening that affected
your body but now your anatomy is literally rearranged.
Your first accomplishment when you are a kid is to be potty trained, to have control over
your bowels and your bladder and that immediately is taken away.
Just the idea of losing that first accomplishment -- it can be challenging.
No matter what age someone gets an ostomy pouch at, it can be a difficult change.
Teenagers who are still very flexible and very resilient are so worried about how your peers
perceive you and you're very concentrated on not only the bodily
changes that have happened due to surgery but just naturally becoming an adult.
The older demographic, who also get ostomy pouches, it's such a huge game
changer. I think that you already have a way you like to dress and you have a
sense of self. There are also concerns like will my partner my significant
other, my husband, my wife find me attractive still? No matter what age people
get their ostomy there are unique challenges but all of those challenges
can be worked through. Being a 19-year- old who was in the dating world, I was
worried that I wouldn't be attractive to people, I was worried that this pouch
would scare my soulmate off and the fact of the matter is is that it's a lot less
scary than I thought it would be and the person that I really had to make sure
was okay with my pouch was me. I've never had a negative
reaction from a significant other about my ostomy and I think a big part of that
has to do with the way that I present it which is: it saved my life and without it
I wouldn't be here. How I accepted how my body looked with an ostomy pouch was
basically just to one: appreciate that it still functioned like a normal body in a
lot of ways but, two: I think that I started exercising a lot, I started to
physically challenge myself, I started running races, I started lifting weights
pretty seriously and that was me showing myself that I could still do these
really amazing things and that my body was not broken and that my body was
still my home.
The first time I went swimming after I got my ostomy I wore a
bikini to the hot tub at the gym and I was pretty nervous, I actually think I
was shaking when I walked out, and, kind of, my fears were realized. I looked
around there was just one other couple in the hot tub and they were on the
other side of the hot tub and, this girl, I overheard her whisper to her
boyfriend, "What is that?" and I remember for years afterward I wore one pieces.
Recently I have been wearing two pieces again and and being more confident but,
really, on days that I just want to enjoy my beach time, when I want to swim,
when I want to just relax I do wear those one pieces and that's
because I don't want to feel like I have to explain myself to people.
Ten days before my ostomy surgery was scheduled I decided, I was 19 at the time, that I
wanted to wear the tightest dress that I owned because I didn't think that I'd be
able to wear tight things after ostomy surgery, and go out dancing with some
girlfriends. It was kind of part of my mourning process that you know I'm
saying goodbye to this 19-year-old girl who has a cute, small waist and can wear
these things. So, I was going through my closet
very recently and my ostomy surgery has been almost five years ago now and I
found that dress. Right after surgery I wouldn't have put it on. I don't think I
would have even tried. Putting on that dress and looking in the mirror and not
seeing a trace of my ostomy bag -- it felt like I was taking back a part of me that
I thought I had lost but I never really did.