Hey.
Guess what?
Mm.
My dry ice arrived.
Your what?
Yeah, my dry ice.
Why did you get dry ice?
I want to check out those dry ice explosives that I keep seeing online.
Care to join?
That sounds like a terrible idea.
Let's do it.
Nice.
We're invited to my friend's birthday party at 6 p.m next Saturday.
Do you want to go?
Um...
maybe not.
Oh come on. It'll be fun.
Well, I was thinking that instead of going out,
you could come over and help me set up my new house.
What?
You said I wasn't allowed to enter your new house until you'd finished arranging everything.
Well I
changed my mind.
Can I bring my label-maker?
Please.
I already have a label maker.
Ah yes.
But is yours a Swinton?
Of course.
What do you think I am?
A peasant?
Okay.
Well then can I at least bring my tape measure?
I already have everything that you could possibly need.
I'll bring my knife sharpener,
so I can sharpen all your scissors!
No!
Last time you did that,
you ruined my fabric scissors!
Oo I'll bring my gardening tools and get to work on your hedges!
Oo this is a dream!
Okay that's enough!
I've changed my mind.
Let's go to the party.
Nope.
Too late.
I'm already emailing my team as we speak!
We'll finally get to practice house arranging plan number 12!
I hope you don't mind but
I brought this to take notes about you as we talk.
Is that cool with you?
So cool that I've done the same thing!
What are the other notebooks for?
Oh I always bring spares just in case strangers need conversations too.
Ah, interesting...
do you think the fact that you carry so many is because you have difficulty committing?
Oo!
Nice question!
This is going to be a great date!
Unpacked is fun-packed!
Soooo we could get Thai,
or Mexican,
or Spanish?
Ummm...
or Japanese, maybe?
You like Japanese, right?
Oh.
Yes, I do.
Or what about French?
Actually yeah,
let's do something fancy!
Do you want to do something fancy?!
Um,
well...
Actually nah. I changed my mind.
It's too much trouble.
So Mexican?
How about Maccas?
Nah.
Yeah nah.
How about pizza?
We could just order pizza.
Jenny told us the name of that place that I've forgotten.
I'll look it up now.
Orrrrrr
what about fish and chips?
Oh.
Could we go down to the beach, maybe?
Oh yeah!
Hey, we can play beach volleyball!
Or surf!
Or swim!
Who am I kidding?
I'm not gonna surf or swim.
I don't...
really
want to get in the water.
I just kind of want to
look at tiny crabs.
Yeah nice, we can totally do that!
Hey what about we take a whole bunch of crucifixes to the haunted house down on Waverly Street
and see if we can extract information from the ghosts?
What?
I'm just kidding.
Oh.
Phew.
I've already done that.
They told me nothing.
Hey!
Are you still here?
Yeah I was just talking to the cat.
I don't know where she went though.
Gosh, I thought you would have gone home hours ago!
Nup. Still here.
You having a good time?
Oh my goodness, absolutely!
This is the most fantastic party I've ever been to!
There's a silent disco!
Where has that been all my life?
Not to mention,
I met a guy who's in the actual circus!
I asked him if he's having auditions.
He said no.
That was probably for the best 'cause I don't have any circus tricks.
What about you? What have you been doing
on the floor?
Just talking to Chloe really.
Is that the cat?
Yeah.
And watching everyone of course.
Watching Jill follow Ashley around with the spray-and-wipe is hilarious.
Great!
Well,
are you having a good time?
Yeah of course!
I'm having a great time!
Drinks are good, pizza was good,
Chloe was just phenomenal company of course.
Don't know where she's got to.
Kind of miss her.
So you don't feel like I
abandoned you
three seconds after we arrived?
No.
Why would I think that?
You have no idea how much that means to me!
So would you like to check in on the forward plan?
Sure. If that works for you.
I'm at your disposal for
three and a half minutes.
Perfect.
Well I was thinking we'd invest largely in property,
but diversify into some blue chip stocks,
and sweep all of the dividends into a joint
superannuation fund at the end of each financial year.
No. I meant our forward plan for our dates over the next few months,
not
whatever that was.
Oh I see.
That was just my contingency plan in case we stayed together in the long term.
So let's see.
We're booked in 'til next April at this stage,
then we go into pencil territory. So...
we've got dinner on the 12th
and that potential Korean film festival for the 20th.
But we haven't got anything in May yet.
Thoughts?
"Contingency plan for the long term"?
You really know how to speak my language, don't you?
I got tingles when I said it.
But unfortunately,
I do have to go.
Fair enough.
It was lovely meeting you.
I'll be in touch.
Yeah, nice to meet you too.
Bye.
Now, I hope you don't mind,
but I've gone ahead and made a spreadsheet for our trip with the gang!
Oh!
That's all right, isn't it?
Yes, of course!
Are you sure?
Well it's just that I...
I'd done a chart for it.
That's all.
A chart?
Yeah!
This!
Oh!
Wow!
That's wonderful!
You've put so much work into that!
See?
I even put in meal choices 'cause I remember you said you wanted to do that next time!
Oh wow!
That's so sweet of you!
Umm...
Why don't we just use the spreadsheet though?
That way we can both have a copy.
Just makes things easier.
Oh but I made one for you too!
Oh!
Delightful!
...and so I find that I tend to over-explain
over-explaining.
What were we talking about?
I honestly have no idea.
We went on so many tangents.
Yeah, but I feel like that's a natural thing to do.
Sure.
As natural snakes doing handstands.
Snakes can do handstands?
They could probably do neck stands.
Oh wait, they don't have any bones.
I mean surely they have vertebrae or something.
That's how they can have the
S shape when they slither.
...sliver?
Slither.
True!
Or maybe they're like jelly.
Although they can't stand upright, can they?
Oh hang on.
But don't they, like,
use the rest of their body to support
while their front half is, like, stood up?
Yeah or they kind of
throw their body into a lunge?
Oh my gosh
imagine snakes doing gymnastics!
Imagine them in little leotards!
I don't know how that would work because they don't have arms or legs but
I could make it work somehow.
Maybe like a velcro?
Oh my gosh tutus!
Imagine cute little snakes in tiny little tutus!
So cute!
SPARKLY ONES!
Wait can they do the splits if they don't have legs?
Surely it's just...
lying on the floor.
But then that's just them existing and there's nothing special about-
*GASP* surely their jaw does the splits when they bite?
Imagine seeing a snake doing a full-on log roll instead of like a sliver.
Like rolling at full speed towards you.
Oh my gosh that's scary!
Oh my gosh you might be onto something.
This sounds like a kids' TV show!
*GASP* They could call it "Gymnassssstics"!
Or "Gymnassssticssss"!
That's incredible.
Wait would it be Gymsnakes or Gymnasnakes?
The latter sounds better.
Speaking of latter...
Snakes and Ladders is a fun game.
HO! I'm gonna reserve that domain name!
Do you think we should have snacks for the snakes on hand?
Snake snacks?
Snay-acks?
What?
The domain name "Gymnasnakes" is already taken!
What?
By who?
By me.
Why?
I'll give it to you for $100.
No.
Okay.