- This is Millard Filmore.
He's known for looking exactly like Alec Baldwin.
("Hail to the Chief")
- Hi, I'm Mars.
- Hi, I'm Patrick.
- Hi, I'm Matt.
- Hello, I am Ehis.
- And today-- - And today.
- We're identifying
U.S. presidents - U.S. presidents!
- I think I'm gonna do okay.
I wrote a book called "The Presidential (beep) Book",
where you put (beep) on the presidents
of the United States and also listed
all their (beep) moves.
And so I knew a lot of them really well.
There's a couple of beardy looking guys
that I'm worried about.
They all look the same.
But I think I'll be all right.
- I am also very confident.
I had to memorize these in fourth grade,
- Oh, amazing.
- And since then, I've read a biography
of every single one of these men.
- I took AP U.S. history in high school,
so Mr. Fauver, if you're out there,
I'm about to either make you proud or embarrass you.
- I've just like watched...
(laughs)
a film.
- [Producer] Alright guys, 10 minutes on the clock.
You are good to go.
- Let's get started.
- Okay, how should we do this?
Do you wanna like, try to go in order?
- Yeah, let's try to go in order
and then we'll do it once in order
and then like we'll fill in the blanks.
- Okay. - Yeah.
- Perfect, well- - All right.
- Definitely got Washington here.
- Well that's not order, but okay.
- Wait, or are we going to go backwards?
Oh! - Oh! I--
- We could do that-- - That's Abe Lincoln.
(laughs)
- All right, let's communicate
Why don't we? - All right.
I'll start on this side,
you wanna handle that side? - Great.
- And then we'll meet in the middle.
- Sounds good. - Okay.
- Okay, that's a General.
- This is Grant.
- This is Abraham Lincoln.
- This is Clinton.
- This is a bearded man.
- Hayes.
- Jesus.
We know who is carrying the weight in this team.
(laughs)
- This is Richard Nixon.
- All right.
- Not a crook.
- Well nope, he was definitely a crook.
- Definitely- - 100% a crook.
- 100%
- This one, first guy to be impeached.
- George Bush Senior.
- I love that you're quizzing me.
(laughs)
This is fun.
Give me the first letter of his last name.
- J.
- Johnson? - Yes!
- Taft, the guy that supposedly got stuck in a bathtub
but actually didn't, guys.
Fun fact!
That's a lie, he was just big.
- Oh.
- Cartoon cat.
- Garfield!
I like this, this is fun!
- This is Grant.
- Is that Taft?
No? - No.
- This is Millard Fillmore.
He's known for looking exactly like Alec Baldwin.
- He was president after he got shot.
- He got shot? - Yeah.
- Wow, a lot of presidents got shot.
(laughs)
First letter of his last name.
- A.
- Second letter (laughs).
- This is Warren G. Harding.
Harding, if memory serves, died of eating bad crab,
so that can happen to you.
- Just tell me.
- Arthur.
Chester Arthur.
- Ah, Chester!
- This is Calvin Coolidge.
He didn't say much so we're not gonna say much about him.
- Oh shit, I'm gonna let you start writing.
This is bad.
- This is George Bush.
- This is Eisenhower.
- City in Ohio.
- Cleveland!
Grover Cleveland!
- Yes, yes.
- This is Woodrow Wilson.
- Oh, okay.
- Is that Millard Fillmore?
- No.
- This is one of the beardy looking guys
that I'm going to wait on, I think it's Hayes,
but we're going to wait.
This is George W. Bush.
- This is Trump, though I wish it was Hilary.
- [Producer] Seven minutes.
- Oh (beep) so we've got to hurry up
Benjamin Harrison.
- This is Harry S. Truman, the S just stands
for S, there's no actual initial there.
Also, he dropped the bomb, less of a fun fact.
- That's Teddy.
- Yes.
- This is JFK.
- This is George Bush.
George W. Bush.
- This is Herbert Hoover.
He started, he didn't start The Depression,
but he didn't make it better.
- Millard Fillmore.
(laughs)
- You're going to get to it eventually.
- I know, I can't wait.
- Yeah, oh, this is Reagan,
and I feel really lucky that I got paired
with a historian, apparently.
- This is LBJ.
- I got Obama.
- John Adams?
- Mhmm.
- This is Franklin Pierce, I think he was drunk a lot,
unfortunately because his wife died.
It's kind of a bummer actually.
You know what, cut that, it's a bummer.
(beeps)
- Madison, Monroe are tricky.
- I actually don't think that's Jame Madison
because isn't James Madison the fourth president?
- Yes.
- He's kinda chunky.
- No, he's a skinny, tiny man.
- Oh, these aren't the pictures that I saw on Wikipedia,
so it's like throwing me off.
- Is this Henry?
- That, I think, is John Tyler.
- Oh yeah, you're right, that's-
- I think it's John Tyler.
- No wait, is that John Tyler?
- I think that might be Harrison,
but that's a weird looking picture so I want to wait
until we go through the others.
- Okay, all right.
- You know what, let's, let's come back to him.
- Okay.
- Oh, Andrew Jackson.
- Yes.
- How about this guy, Van Buren?
- That's Van Buren, that is Van Buren.
- I think he was in Hamilton.
- Andrew Johnson.
- Millard Fillmore.
(laughs)
- That's James K. Polk.
- This is Ford.
- That's Ford.
- Jefferson.
- McKinley?
That might be McKinley, I'm going to wait on that.
That's FDR.
- This is Buchanan, right?
The hair.
- That look likes Buchanan, yes.
- No, no, that's either, that's the other Madison or Monroe,
this is Jefferson.
- All right, so we think that this is Madison,
and this is Monroe?
- This is Andrew Jackson.
He was roundly a jerk.
- Millard Fillmore.
(laughs)
Watch this be Millard Fillmore (laughs)
- Adams, Jr.?
- Yes, John Quincy Adams
- [Producer] Four minutes
- Oh shit, okay.
- Oh god.
- Van Buren.
- This is Chester A. Arthur, really just ought to have
called him president muttonchops.
- This is Harding.
- Okay, let's do the beardy guys.
- Oh yeah, we got to.
- I think this is Garfield.
- Truman.
- Bae, Clinton.
- That is Cleveland, cause this is Taft.
- Oh yeah, you're right.
- This is John Tyler.
- FDR, fun fact we share the same birthday, May 29th.
- Okay, I'm going to say that's Hayes.
- Cleveland.
- Uh, Carter.
- And then let's go ahead and say that's Benjamin Harrison.
- Taft.
- Oh my god, Reagan, Reaganomics.
Coolidge.
- Uh, Truman?
- FDR.
- Hayes.
- [Producer] Five minutes left
- Okay.
- Oh, we're doing pretty good.
My handwriting's atrocious though.
- I'm worried about who this is.
- This is Harrison, he died right away.
- Yeah, no, I think that's Harrison, I think that's Tyler.
- Okay, that's William Henry Harrison, so W. Harrison.
- Is this Truman?
- Nope, he replaced Nixon.
- Ford.
- Yes.
- I think it's McKinley.
- McKinley.
- Is my best-
- I'm going to go with your gut feeling,
cause you've clearly gotten this entire side down.
- Johnson.
- Did you already do Millard Fillmore?
- That's John Adams for sure.
- Yeah.
- Yes, my man.
- And you want to put, there's Washington.
- We got this far and didn't do Washington?
Amazing.
- George Bush.
- This is John Tyler.
- That's McKinley.
- Madison has a widow's peak for days, that's his deal.
And Monroe looks different in every picture I've ever seen
of him so that has to be Monroe.
- All right, let's do it.
- That's Buchanan.
- Uh, I'm going to say that's John Tyler,
where was the other, where was the guy that you said-
- No, that's John Tyler.
- Not John Tyler, I meant Zachary Taylor, sorry.
- Oh, yeah, no, that's Taylor.
- Eisenhower.
- Have we got Zachary-
- I think you're right.
- Okay.
- Go for it.
- Zachary Taylor.
- Go with McKinley.
- We haven't said him yet.
- All right, so are we sure that this is Monroe,
this is Madison?
- I think we did it.
- Yes.
- These aren't the pictures I saw on Wikipedia so...
- Let's switch them.
- Okay.
- I know Garfield is balding.
I think Hayes had the longest beard and Harrison looked
like the average of the two, is how I try to remember this.
- [Producer] You guys are forfeiting your last minute?
- Yeah - Yeah, we don't need it.
- I mean, I could do some stand-up.
(cymbal clashes)
- We got them all
- We got them all, yeah!
Nicely done, well done.
- One, two, three, let's look
- Damn it!
- I would not have known that Alec Baldwin thing,
I didn't know, and I will never forget it now.
- Viewers at home, there's a thing called a Freudian slip,
and that is what happened when I put FDR under JFK,
(fast forwarded talking)
but this, I am disappointed in myself,
and I am sorry to the Kennedys.
- I feel like we empirically killed it, like,
so I think we did all right.
- I think we crushed the other team.
Apparently Mr. Fauver, you did me good.
- Pierce, he's no Millard Fillmore, but he can get it.
(upbeat music)