[Music]
[Applause]
hey guys so yes it is a completely
different day but I'm wearing the same
shirt for continuity one-million I feel
like it still hasn't really settled into
my brain yet even though it's like a
full week later it still shocks me when
I look at my page I'm like that's too
many but it seems like a lot and it
seems like a thing that you should
celebrate you know people do a lot of
big things for these types of milestones
they give away MacBook Pros they go
skydiving but I always trying to think
of what represents my love for you guys
and the one thing I love just as much as
you guys is a good bowl of cereal that
was a really bad transition so basically
for a million subscribers I am going to
try to eat a million pieces of cereal
one for each of lovey one of you and
we're gonna hope that I don't throw up
so it is around 8 a.m. right now I'm
heading to Ralph's hopefully before
there's too many people walking around
in the aisles judging me for filming
myself talking about cereal but we'll
see just another day in my life kids I
didn't want to say before I jump into
the silliness of this video about just
thank you guys so [ __ ] much I'm not
gonna cry or anything over this because
I have learned at an early age to shield
my emotions from the world but I did
want to say thank you so much so onto
the cereal challenge we go
[Music]
the other one now you might be wondering
how you count up to a million pieces of
cereal here is some quick serial maths
for you
I am approximating that each piece of
cereal is around point two by point two
five point one inches I realize this is
a little bit generous when it comes to
larger cereals like cinnamon toast
crunch but it might actually be under
approximating something very saying that
like a flake the average volume of a
cereal box is around eight inches wide
by 12 inches tall by two inches thick
which gives us 192 two big engines
divide that by the point zero zero four
cubic inches of a piece of cereal and
we're left with 48 thousand pieces of
cereal per box which I also realize is a
bit generous because cereals don't like
exactly pack into the box with maximum
efficiency but we're going to be a
little bit generous here for the sake of
my digestive system and me not wanting
to throw up a million divided by 48
thousand pieces of cereal leaves us with
approximately 20 boxes of cereal okay so
for larger cereals they average closer
to three thousand pieces per box but
we're just gonna ignore that fact in
this video maybe I'd keep watching and
pretend like it's actually a million
pieces thanks
[Music]
I just spent over 90 dollars on cereals
honestly maybe it would have been
cheaper to buy a [ __ ] MacBook editing
Ashley that sequence better have been
[ __ ] cute because I spent over two
hours filming and a lot of awkward eye
contact with grocery store employees so
this is what my life has come to of
course we gotta start with cinnamon
toast crunch
the og and my one true love no offense
David here we go folks
the first fool as you may predict
cinnamon toast crunch 10 out of 10
experience in terms of soaked ability it
is like the perfect wait time so that
you can comfortably finish a bowl before
it gets soggy
unlike some cereals what you do that
immediately rice Chex the texture is
also a good balance between something
that's clunky but something that also
doesn't like absolutely destroy the top
of your mouth and Captain Crunch I think
it is the perfect cereal to spice things
up a little bit
pun intended good because cinnamon is a
spice I'm not funny well today's the day
folks I'm about to lose my cocoa puffs
virginity I feel like the kids squeak
cocoa puffs growing up or the type of
kids who do with it's when they're in
college as a breakfast food I give cocoa
puffs like a three out of ten but as a
period craving food 11 out of 10 it
honestly just looks like a fruit loop
but their mascot is coked-up that just
is a fruit loop without the hole this
takes off people but I never had a lucky
charm
I know these like are addictive to some
people I met this girl in Germany who is
jealous like these get me a box of Lucky
Charms pick out just the marshmallows
and then mail them to me I will pay you
despite the fact that I am on my fourth
bowl of cereal in one setting at which
point pretty much anything starts
today's bad weird German girl who asked
me to smell the Lucky Charms across the
border for her I see where you're coming
from
these are pretty goddamn good honey
snack and good violet so sexual
the texture reminds me of the texture of
insulation foam you don't it's just like
not great I listen to the dough scratch
no my baby oh my lord how do kids eat
this for breakfast this is a chocolate
bar masquerading as a cereal at this
point it's officially time for me to
change out of my jeans in to leggings
because oh I'm so full god I look like
[ __ ] Pooh Bear just eating his honey
okay raisin bran cereal for people who
are old enough to have given up on life
even their [ __ ] logo looks one bad
day as the manager of a Verizon store
away from leaving Becky and the kids
forever and moving to Thailand
[Music]
this is a serial that exists zero out of
ten
now it's Cocoa Puffs are the cocaine of
cereals Applejack's or the
methamphetamine look at this Apple he's
on that good good Breaking Bad chip
anyways look oh this is just fruit loops
except they're orange ah yes the sweet
smell of a craft store during Christmas
time was fruity pebbles invented by the
Flintstone or was the Flintstones
cartoon a spin-off of the serial fruity
pebbles hold on okay so according to
google they invented these cereals
because of the Flintstones show that is
capitalism at its finest my friends well
it's confirmed folks cereal really does
only come in three flavors neon fruit
wheat sugar and chocolate this is a rice
krispies but it's the Easter Bunny shout
it out and made it no puzzle I do this
again I'm just gonna brush my teeth real
quick because this is too much sugar for
me I feel so gross uh-oh you can do it
this is a fruity little option honestly
pretty jerseys did not exist when I was
a kid this seems like some gen Z [ __ ]
this is perhaps the most peculiar cereal
I've ever tasted like those Strawberry
Shortcake ice cream popsicles and a love
child with children's liquid ibuprofen
and this is what they created next we've
got puns lectures of oats the
responsible 30-year old career woman of
cereals now believe it or not this was
actually my favorite cereal growing up
more than Cinnamon Toast Crunch
honey nutz curios this is like the
responsible four year old mom of serials
there is a slight aftertaste of
cardboard but other than that she is a
lovely and dependable healthy ish cereal
this must be the [ __ ] heroine of
cereals this stuff looks intense it
looks like this nice flaky pastry
surrounding gooey chocolate it's
basically like a chocolate croissant but
in serial form no I've been click baited
by a cereal package this [ __ ] is like a
horrid sugary Captain Crunch surrounding
the smallest piece of chocolate I've
ever seen no you can do this Ashley nine
more boxes
I am already a little bit suspicious
about this cereal because it looks
suspiciously like Cinnamon Toast Crunch
and I do not take somebody ripping off
cinnamon toast crunch lightly hmm
interesting both it brands is like
cinnamon toast crunch is weird
uncle who lives in Canada if they're
clearly related you know it's the exact
same shape and a very similar texture
but Golden Grahams is a bit more dense
it's a bit more weedy and the cinnamon
flavor is replaced with maple syrup
no bad not bad at golden brown Reese's
puffs I do like a good Reese's Cup I
actually ate like two Reese's Cups every
single day when I was in high school god
bless my metabolism back then
there's no chocolate and there's no
visible peanut butter yet they taste
exactly like a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup
what is the sorcery now this is the
[ __ ] moly of cereals he's rollin on
something maybe it's just the delicious
taste of cookie crisps maybe it's some
MDMA we'll never know a solid six point
five out of ten it looks like a
chocolate chip cookie but it tastes like
corn sugar like all the rest of the
cereals do frosted mini-wheats little
bites from spit flakes this is what I
ate all the time growing up it's
dead-ass just corn flakes cut with sugar
on it
damn young Ashley had some pretty good
taste if I may say so myself
don't Chris looks nearly identical to
Honey Smacks this seems to be the same
thing but with a slightly different
animal on front the texture is actually
surprisingly a lot better this is very
foamy but this is properly crunchy Oh
the last cereal this is a cereal that
brings back good memories because it is
the cereal that I only ever ate when I
was on vacation for some reason we never
had it at home but we buy it like when
we went to the beach or something like
that also my family only ever went to
the beach during October so it wouldn't
be crowded but it also happened to be
freezing and then the beach wasn't fun
as I finished out my final bowl of
cereal I thought I would talk a little
bit more about you know hitting this
milestone and what's next in my life I
don't want to make this video sad and
I'm not sure this is something that a
lot of people will understand but when I
reached a million I actually had like a
couple hours where I was really sad and
confused and I'm not sure that's a
reaction that anybody ever shows on
their channel like they're just really
happy and happy crying and they
celebrate with their family and stuff
I'm so grateful for you guys I'm for a
million subscribers and know for a
second think that I don't love all of
you and I'm so lucky to be where I am
but it made me think about the way that
I was raised and the way that I work a
lot of the times is just if you work
hard enough and you're miserable for
this long it's okay as long as once
you've reached an achievement you're
gonna be happy and it's gonna be
it I felt like that after high school I
grinded my ass off working minimum-wage
jobs and getting straight A's I felt
like once I just got free and I got to
college my wife would be great my life
could finally start um and once I got to
college it wasn't enough and I just told
myself you know move on to the next
thing once you reach 100k on YouTube
you're gonna be happy and you know it
took like a week after 100k for me to
start thinking when am I gonna reach a
million I think it's so common to
constantly spend your life chasing
milestones like when am I going to hit
this age or this number or get a
promotion at my job and I feel like I'm
learning at a really young age that
those milestones are never enough to
make you feel worth it
no matter how good they are you know oh
god that's so eve oh no I'm gonna keep
trying harder and harder than ever to
make really good videos for you guys to
keep you guys updated but also you know
working on my own sense of like
satisfaction within myself so that
brings us to the end of this cereal
challenge I feel like a part of my soul
has left my body and has been replaced
by high fructose corn syrup honestly if
I eat another bite of cereal I will
throw up I have eaten about a bowl of 20
boxes of cereal which i think is around
like 2,000 3,000 pieces of cereal max
which if you roundup is basically a
million so that's a cop-out if I ever
heard of it even if I haven't eaten all
my cereal though I still have all of you
guys as little pieces of cereal in my
heart I really appreciate all of you
guys that's the main message of this
video I'll see you guys next week
[Music]
my poops are gonna be so weird after
this