80s icon, sex symbol, Monica’s boyfriend on Friends, our favorite bachelor from Three Men
and a Baby, and the list goes on. But none have been more important to the actor than his role as
a family man. Tom Selleck said he “always planned” to be married for the rest of his life, just
before his divorce. That, of course, until a cat… we mean, a certain someone has changed his life.
Tom Selleck walked down the aisle for the first time in 1971, when he married
Jacqueline Ray. The couple met on the set of his hit series Magnum, P.I. The romance between the
two quickly blossomed, and they tied the knot. Upon their marriage, Selleck adopted Ray’s son,
Kevin, whom she welcomed in 1966 with a previous partner. The actor loved his
adopted son very much. He watched Kevin grow up and follow into his footsteps.
Tom and Jacqueline were the best parents, but not the best spouses. As time went on, the pair’s
marriage began to crumble, and after eleven years together, they decided to call it quits.
But before his divorce from Ray was official, Selleck opened up about their relationship. During
a chat with People, the actor revealed that he had always planned to be married for the rest of his
life. He also added that not spending forever with Ray was one of the greatest sorrows in his life.
It’s safe to assume that the man was pretty lonely after his divorce.
A 38-year-old Tom was filming on location in London when his coworkers noticed just
how upset and lonely he was feeling, so they took him to see a production of Cats.
Apparently, the production was so good that Selleck went back over a DOZEN
times to re-watch it! It must have been absolutely on-point to the actor, right?
He spent night after night in the West End, constantly telling fellow Lassiter
star Jane Seymour how great the show was. “I thought it was good, but I couldn’t see
going back a dozen times,” Seymour said, feeling he’d developed an obsession with the musical.
It turns out, Tom kept going back to see the production because of his developing
infatuation with a special someone — a high-energy dancer who played Rumpleteazer.
The 29-year-old actor and dancer Jillie Mack definitely caught the eye of the star.
Despite being one of the most sought-after actors of his time, who looked like a sex symbol, Tom had
never been a ladies’ man. According to the actor himself, Selleck was always somewhat shy with
women and not exactly brimming with confidence. “I’m this big guy, and I’ve played a lot of
leads,” he said apologetically, “and sometimes I have to play the guy that
just assumes the girl will say yes. But in reality, I’m a guy who assumes she’ll say no.”
While Selleck said he’s not as smooth with the ladies as his on-screen counterparts,
he approached his future wife backstage. Well, he got there,
but she was the one who made the first move. “She had to go on stage. I was hemming and hawing,
and she finally asked, ‘Do you want to meet for a cocktail?’” Selleck recalled later.
And that was it. The two hit it off and started dating. A dinner date turned out
to be all that the pair needed to start bonding and falling for each other.
It might seem crazy to pack your bags and uproot yourself from your home and everything you know
for love, but that’s exactly what Jillie Mack did. She decided to take a leap of faith and
follow her heart, and left London behind in favor of the sunny skies and palm tree laden beaches
of Hawaii, where Tom was filming Magnum P.I. When Mack’s on-stage contract ended, she moved
to Hawaii. Soon after, the couple began appearing together everywhere, from the Emmy’s red carpet
to Selleck’s Hollywood Walk of Fame induction. Four years after they met, the Magnum P.I. star
and the English actor and dancer shocked fans and media alike by tying the knot in secret.
Selleck was anxious to keep the ceremony private and went to great lengths to keep the nuptials
under the radar. He even got his brother to make the wedding arrangements under fake names.
Bob took care of all the details with the 24-hour wedding chapel in Lake Tahoe, Nevada,
under the aliases “Tom Jenkins” and “Suzie Mark.”
On August 7, 1987, the lovebirds said “I do” in a late-evening ceremony. The minister didn’t know
the couple’s true identity until minutes before the service! And Tom had only Polaroid snapshots
taken of the wedding, so photos from negatives couldn’t be leaked to the press. Wow, so thorough!
“They were both nervous, like any other couple about to get married,”
their wedding officiant told People magazine. “He was very concerned that the service be heartfelt,
very concerned for her that the service be meaningful. He is a very warm, caring man.”
Unlike many other celebrities, the wedding was not only private, but a very cheap affair. The
wedding costs were low, as the ceremony mounted to $75, and the marriage license fee was $27.
It was exactly 27 days later when the Nevada Appeal reported that Selleck and Mack had been
married. At first, Tom’s publicist, denied the report. Then a few hours later she confirmed it
but would dish no more details. “His divorce was quiet, too,” she said.
The following year, the couple welcomed their little girl, Hannah, who,
unlike her parents, later established a successful career away from show business.
She is a model and an equestrian jumping athlete. The youngest Selleck once mentioned that because
her parents were artists, they believed that one had to be very passionate about their craft
to be successful. Well, no argument here. The couple kept their relationship private
after the wedding as well. They bought a 65-acre ranch in Ventura County, California,
and Tom took a break from his career to spend more time with his partner and his daughter.
“I quit Magnum to have a family,” he told People in 2012.
“It took a long time to get off the train, but I try very hard to have balance, and this ranch
has helped me do that.” They both thought it was the best environment for Hannah to grow up.
The ranch afforded the actor plenty of time to bond with his lovely family.
The couple made good parenting partners, Tom told the New York Daily News in 1999.
“We don’t do anything or make any decisions without consulting each other,” he said.
While Selleck has played several fictional roles, the actor said fatherhood had been
the most important role of his life. Over the years, the actor has been
frank about his unwillingness to sacrifice privacy just because his job places him in the spotlight.
“I’ve found it very difficult to expose my private life and live with it,” he said in 1984. That,
coupled with his number-one priority — “time with my family” — are no doubt
factors that have contributed to one of modern Hollywood’s longest marriages.
“It’s important to nurture your marriage,” he said. “I think wanting time away from
work has been good for that.” He later opened up about his
decision to quit Magnum P.I., saying he wasn’t cut out for life in the national spotlight.
“I knew intellectually what it would mean in terms of being a public person,
but until you’ve lived it, there’s no way to understand it,” Selleck revealed. “I had a feeling
of, ‘I don’t think I’m cut out for this.’” In a rare and candid interview,
the now-77-year-old star of the CBS police drama Blue Bloods opened up about his family,
life on his Ventura ranch, and his decision to quit at the peak of his fame.
Ultimately, he chose to do that not because he didn’t like the show, or he was tired of it,
but because he was tired from it. “I’m a fairly private person,”
Tom explained. “And I’ve always treasured the balance between work and time with my family.
It’s always about them.” And so Selleck opted to retreat from Hollywood on a self-imposed hiatus.
One year off became several when the actor found he didn’t like what he was being offered.
“I put up with the articles that said he’s disappeared, he’s done. And you do get done,
I’m well aware of that. It was a big lull, but it put a lot of things in perspective.”
He eventually returned to the small screen in the ’90s, with roles on Friends and, later,
The Closer. Finally, he was cast in the role that has defined the later years of his career:
police commissioner Frank Reagan on Blue Bloods. When Tom is not shooting Blue Bloods in New York
City, he spends every spare minute at home on the ranch with Jillie.
“My relationships and my ranch keep me sane,” says the actor. “I do grunt work and I make
the rounds. I like watching things grow. It’s a retreat.” The ranch was a working avocado farm
until the plants were decimated by drought, and still is home to over 1,500 native trees.
Looking back over his 50-plus-year career, the actor says he’s grateful
for his life on and off camera. He’s proud of his work, he still loves what he does.
“And I have my family. I’ve been enormously fortunate.”
So what’s his secret? Selleck says that he and Jillie simply have a “yin and yang” dynamic: while
he’s more introspective and quiet, Mack has an “effervescent quality that just lights up a room.”
In an interview with GQ, the renowned actor reflected on their marriage, saying that it has
become more satisfying through the years. He added that their love for each other has gotten deeper.
“Apart from being my wife, she’s my friend,” Selleck adds. That, and the little things
the actor does to keep the romance alive. “I get up before Jillie and put on the teakettle,
so when she gets up, her tea water is hot,” Tom said. “I think I’m pretty romantic.”