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When Allah speaks about children in the Quran,
when He is blessing people with a child,
where people are asking Allah
to bless them with a child,
the Qur'an consistently uses the word
Wahab.
Wahabina, habili,
meaning, we gifted them
or they say, Oh, Allah, gift us with a child.
The phrase gift comes up over and over again
when referring to children.
Children are a gift from Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la,
and the gifts and blessings we receive from Allah
require our care, protection,
and guardianship.
Instinctively, whether we are Muslim or otherwise,
every parent knows
that we need to take care of our kids.
We need to raise them, to protect them,
to help them.
But for a Muslim, our need to assume responsibility
of being parents
is even more important.
As a believer,
our role as parents affects everything.
Our dunya,
our aakhirah, and our ummah.
It affects our aakhirah, our place in the next world.
Our Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam said that
"All the deeds of the child of Adam
are cut off at the time of death,
except for three.
One of which
"Walidun salihun yadu' la."
A righteous child praying for them.
People think about what legacy
they're leaving behind in this world.
But the reality is that the mark we leave
on our friends,
on our coworkers,
is often very casual.
But the mark and the impact we leave on our children
is significant.
And when it's a positive impact
their prayers for us are so powerful
that it propels us forward in the next world,
even after we've passed away.
And the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam warns us
about leaving a negative impact on our children
and what that will do to us in the next life.
The Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam said
"Kafa bil mari' min alithmi en yudaiya min yaqoot."
He said, "It is sufficient of a sin for you to neglect,
that which you are obligated to support."
It's enough of a sin,
big enough of a sin,
for us to be neglectful of our children,
those who we are obligated to raise
and strengthen and to support.
And the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam said,
"Ala'a kulukum ra'in wa kulukum masoolun a'n ra'itihi"
He said that, "Indeed, each of you is a shepherd
and each of you is responsible for his flock."
And then the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam
gave the examples.
"A man is a shepherd over his family,
and he's responsible for his flock.
A woman as a shepherd over her children,
and she too is responsible for her flock."
Allah has placed us,
fathers and mothers,
as shepherds over our children.
And we will be asked
about how we took care of that responsibility.
Did we strive to protect them?
To guide them towards what will benefit them,
in a way that a shepherd protects his sheep
from wolves, and guides them to food and water.
Or did we let down our flock?
How we raise our child affects our aakhirah.
It can raise our status in the next world
or it can cause us to fall behind.
It can remove and cleanse our sins
and bring us closer to Allah when our children love us
and pray for us after we've gone,
or it can cause Allah to take us to account
if we have neglected our responsibilities.
How we raise our children also affects
our Dunya, our life in this world.
Both in the Qur'an
and in the hadith of our Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam,
the righteous child is often referred to as,
Qurratul 'Ayn,
which is sometimes translated
as coolness of the eyes.
The Arabs would use the phrase
because they would describe
that when a person is going through times of stress
or hardship or difficulty,
that the person is unstable.
And they're so unstable
that even their eyes
are roving and churning and spinning.
But Qurratul 'Ayn
literally means stillness of the eyes,
calmness of the eyes.
Through Qurratul 'Ayn,
a person feels calmness
you feel stability,
you feel relief, their eyes are at rest.
And so when Qurratul 'Ayn is mentioned
in relation to children,
it kind of indicates
that our lives are turned upside down.
Stressed out, anxious,
when we experience troubles with our children.
Anyone who has experienced their child
going down the wrong path,
would be willing to give up everything
for that not to be the case.
But when our children are doing well,
there's no better relief,
there's no better joy.
O Allah make our children
the coolness of our eyes and the calmness of our eyes.
Finally, how we raise our child
not only affects our aakhirah and our dunya,
but it also affects our community,
our entire ummah.
In Surah Al-Qasas, Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la
begins the Surah by speaking about
the oppression that Fir'awn.
the Pharaoh, commits against Bani Israi'il,
the Children of Israel.
How he enslaved them
and oppressed them and killed their children.
Allah says,
[28:5 Wanureedu an namunna AAala allatheenaistudAAifoo
fee al-ardi
wanajAAalahum a-immatanwanajAAalahumu alwaritheen]
Allah says, "We wanted to give a favor
upon those who are oppressed in the land
and to make them leaders and make them inheritors."
Allah wanted to transform
the history of the Children of Israel
from being oppressed
and marginalized in downtrodden,
to being leaders and inheritors in this world.
So how was this achieved?
The first verse to follow this
is a command.
[28:7 Waawhayna ila ommi Moosa an ardiAAeehi]
"We inspired the mother of Musa, nourish him."
Take care of your child.
The first step to transform an entire community
or ummah, or nation,
was to tell a mother to raise her child.
A righteous mother
raising her child
leads to leaders like Musa Alayhi Salaam,
who can change the entire course of history
for his people.
Through the efforts of Musa and his leadership,
Bani Isra'il went from a people who were enslaved
and oppressed,
to a people who were free
and ultimately became strong.
As we look at the ills and oppressions
which affect our community and ummah today,
we have to realize that the solution
is to build strong homes
and to raise righteous children.
Join me for this series
on the Keys to Prophetic Parenting.
In this series, we will explore and discover keys
to help us unlock,
how to effectively raise our children
as healthy adults and righteous Muslims.
We will look to how the prophets
and righteous people approach raising their kids
to unearth important tools
that can guide our journey through parenting.
And we will be exploring
different modern studies and data on children
and how it converges often
with the Prophetic approach.
In this series, you will learn
one, Prophetic parenting techniques,
using examples from the Prophetic tradition
that we can employ with our children.
Two, how to engage
and empower our children to become responsible
and faithful adults.
And three, how to avoid pitfalls of parenting.
Some of the common errors that parents sometimes make,
in good faith or they're well-intentioned,
but errors, inshaAllah, that we can correct.
Join me on this journey.
As we all try to become better parents
along the Prophetic path.