Okay, so your parachute just failed.
CALM DOWN, CALM DOWN
Do exactly what I say.
And just accept the fact that there are no guarantees in life.
Exepcially right now...
Because you have like statistically about a 0.01 percent chance of surviving.
But again CALM DOWN
Now's not the time to panic. Now is the time to focus.
Because if you just jumped out of the plane from the standard twelve and a half thousand feet,
you've only got about 74 and 1/4 seconds to figure out a way to increase your chances of survival.
First things first
Slow your descent
Spread out your body into an X formation like this
get as flight as humanly possible making sure that the front of your body is facing the ground
This will help you achieve better drag
you're confused about which direction the ground is
It's where you heading toward
Next things next
Try your Backup chute
pull and release the breakaway handle to your primary chute
its most likely attached on your right looks like a clock loop.
Yeah, that's the one
The one on your parachute pack use two hands and pull it.
Pull it now
But now you're probably spinning uncontrollably.
Get back into the X formation then locate, and pull the reserve ripcord on your left.
It's opposite the loop. You just pulled. It's probably colored red.
That's your backup chute.
Keep your head upwards and start scanning your surroundings.
You're looking for three things.
Swamp, snow, trees.
your best chance of surviving is to land in one of those three.
Just away from water.
Lean whichever direction you want to move in,
but don't go into a spin when the moments right
pull yourself up and point your toes to the ground so that you land on your feet.
We're gonna use them to absorb the impact of the fall.
So cover the back of your head with your hands like you're doing a sit-up.
You need to protect your skull and protect your neck.
Go into the fall rolling forward like you're doing a somersault.
[ body falling to the ground sound ]
(Yes, but I become a pretzel.)
[Robot Voice] [Victory Noise]
I mean, that's the weird thing about "Neurogenic Shock", y'know.
It's caused by over exciting the parasympathetic nervous system.
What you're about to experience is actually called "Bradycardia".
Which is a substantial decrease in your heart rate.
And that will lead to a dangerous drop in blood pressure.
So y'know, you're probably feeling very, very, very, sleepy right now.
But do not go to sleep.
Help is on the way, and you need to be wake when they get here!
You're gonna be okaaaayyy!!!!
That there was only 0.0007 percent chance that what just happened to you would actually happen.
you've just experienced something that almost nobody in existence has ever or will ever experience.
Think of all the money you'll make off the book deal that you'll invariably sign.
You'll have a story for your grand kids,
you'll be on The Today Show, and you'll get to meet Al Roker.
Summon the will to live by thinking about how happy you'll be when you get to meet Al Roker.
You probably have your own daily double question in jeopardy in a few years
They'll make a dramatic movie about you where some famous actor or actress will play you.
You'll probably even get to sit next to them at the Oscars because let's face it.
This is the kind of story that the Academy absolutely fawns over.
The parachute company that you just used.
They'll probably pay you a large sum of money to keep you from, y'know, suing them.
You'll get your own personal entry on this Wikipedia page.
You'll forever be able to one-up any exciting story told by anyone you ever go out to dinner with.
[Woman's Voice] "Oh, you went backpacking in Colorado!
Did I ever told you about the time that I survived falling from 12,500 feet." (that is a lot of feet)
they might even ask you to throw out the first pitch at the World Series.
I don't know.
that a YouTube video was the critical factor that...
So y'know, if somebody else happens to tweet some afternoon that they too are falling from the sky.
You can send them a link to this video, and pass your good fortune on.
and on that note, while you're waiting for the ambulance and trying to y' know... stay conscious.
Consider watching these other cool videos from yours truly, and subscribing to my channel.
Unless you... like y'know.... want to call for help or something. I don't care. You do you.
Captions By: joshuaktanki