Introductory note: I wrote this down around three years ago after
a business meeting.
The subject came up quite by chance when, I recalled my NDE which happened in 1964.
Although I had frequently thought about the incident in the intervening years, I am absolutely
positive that nothing has clouded my memory to obscure the facts.
I am sorry if the style appears literary - I had intended to offer it for publication in
a magazine, but never bothered.
I must stress that nothing in it has been sensationalized to clinch a sale.
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I was undergoing basic training in the Army.
One of the guys there said he could make anyone faint.
Now, I had never fainted in my life before although, obviously I had seen others faint,
and grew curious.
Being young, I felt ready for the experience.
I crouched down, breathing deeply, for 30 seconds.
Then I had to take one deep breath and put my thumb in my mouth while the guy hauled
me up and hugged me tightly from behind as I slipped effortlessly back to the floor.
My eyes opened and I looked up at my fellows staring down at me, smiling.
It was a novelty.
Others tried it.
Then, after a space of about half an hour, someone came into the room and expressed interest
in the exercise but was unsure.
I was keen to try it again, and asked the fellow if we could do it again to demonstrate
it to the newcomer.
This time it was very different.
My body slipped slowly to the floor, and everything became dark.
I turned to my right and saw, alone in the cold gloom, a stranger who stared back at
me in surprise.
He was tall, perhaps a little older than me, and had not expected me to see him.
"Don't worry, everything's going to be all right," he said as he approached, and stood
behind me.
I felt as if I were being raised up, and looked down and saw my lifeless form.
"They've killed me," I thought.
"They've killed me.
I've got to have them punished."
I wanted to pierce them all with my anger.
"No, you can't do that," replied the stranger, soothingly.
"You see, it really doesn't matter now.
You'll understand soon enough."
I looked again at the lifeless form.
I could now actually see right inside the body - the lungs, the alimentary system, all
perfectly designed and fitting cleverly together.
Whoever designed the human body was a genius, I thought.
I turned around, and looked up at the stranger.
He now assumed a dark, golden countenance; and now I saw that he had wings - huge brown
wings, flecked with yellow feathers, that flanked the whole of his form.
"But I can't die yet.
I'm so young," I thought.
Then I looked down and saw a family of middle-aged people whom I recognized as my mother and
her sisters, weeping.
"He was a silly fool," said an anonymous voice from somewhere behind me.
"He shouldn't have done that.
And he never achieved anything in his life.""Oh, I don't know," I said defensively.
"He was quite a nice person - and I was just getting to like him.""That's not important
now," said the stranger's voice.
"We must go."
Suddenly I was being propelled across a vast distance - I dare not look straight ahead,
but I remember looking at the wall flashing past me as I sped along some kind of tunnel.
Then, at the other end of this journey, I felt a most beautifully reassuring sense of
calm.
I looked down at myself in my new form; I had taken on a golden glow.
I did not need to walk; I floated.
Everything about me was love, goodness and warmth.
Suddenly, I felt as if I had been given access to the total knowledge of the universe; I
stared at a huge dark wheel, containing stars and other celestial bodies, which slowly revolved.
A deep voice spoke slowly, but I could not make out what it was saying.
Then I was at some kind of entrance; a man stood in authority at the gate; he had black,
tight curls and his face seemed somehow familiar.
"You weren't expected," he said.
His lips did not move; our conversation was entirely telepathic."Well, I'm here now,"
I replied, a little surprised that my lips did not need to move either.
"You can't come in," he said.
Then, turning to the stranger who had accompanied me all the way here, he asked, "Why did you
bring him here?
You know it wasn't the time."
"I was just as surprised," my companion answered.
"Now look here, I demand to be admitted."
I was quite defiant to the gate-keeper.
"I have arrived and I am not going to go away."
He said something about asking higher authority, and instructed us to wait.
To my left was a warm golden light.
My companion, at my right, pointed ahead and I saw a group of children, absolutely perfect
in appearance, totally absorbed in some kind of lesson.
Their teacher was further to the left, outside my line of vision.
Some of the young people saw me and quickly came over and surrounded me.
They were utterly delighted to see me, and I felt overjoyed to meet them.
The gate-keeper returned.
"You can't stay.
You'll have to go back."
"But I can't.
I'm dead."
"It's not usual, but we can take you back.
Say goodbye to these people."
The children - and I - were devastated at this news.
I heard at least one of them groan.
My companion saw my intense disappointment.
"Don't worry," he reassured me.
"You'll see them all again, soon enough."
The gate-keeper turned to me again.
"Now you must promise never to attempt to come here again.
This is very important."
"Oh, all right," I agreed, half-heartedly.
"No, this is serious."
He turned to my companion and asked him to fetch two people whom I would know.
Two elderly women came.
I recognized them as both my grandmothers; they had died some five or six years previously.
My father's mother looked grim; my mother's mother was pleased to see me but, at the gate-keeper's
bidding, was quite firm in her tone: I had to promise solemnly not to try to return.
I agreed.
Once more, I stood in front of the great dark disk again; as the stars and shapes slowly
revolved, a deep voice said slowly: "Your time has not yet come."
Then I felt all the wisdom which I had suddenly gained was being forced out from me; I knew
I could not take this knowledge back with me, but was concerned that I might lose what
limited intelligence I already had before I "died".
And, once again I was in the long tunnel, feeling the wind against my cheek as I looked
away and saw the long wall rushing past me.
I awoke, prostate on the floor.
I felt as if I had received an electric shock, and needed to collect my thoughts.
Bewildered, I looked around me.
I was back.
I was 17 again, with a whole life ahead of me.
A long life, it seemed, before I was due to return to that wonderful place.
How would I have the patience to wait so long.
Immediately, a feeling of acute depression enveloped me.
My barracks room companions looked down, laughing at me.
"You took half a minute or so to wake up!
We thought you'd gone to sleep!"
I got up and walked thoughtfully across to my bed and sat quietly on it for the remainder
of that evening, quietly reflecting on the experience; echoing in my mind were the faces
and voices of the disappointed young people, the revolving disc and the Voice: "Your time
has not yet come."
Twelve years later, my young son and daughter were playing one evening and it was time for
me to put them to bed.
My son turned and looked at me, smiling; my daughter sighed.
In the golden twilight I recognized his look and her sigh immediately.
They were two of the young people I had seen in my near-death experience.
Then, 35 years after the experience, I received another reminder.
It was 1999, and I was in the middle of a routine business meeting with a young woman
in my office in London.
Although I had never met her before, it quickly became apparent that she was quite forthright
in her approach with people.
Suddenly, she turned to me and said, "I know this is quite irregular, but can I ask if
you believe in the supernatural?"
I replied that I kept an open mind.
"I have some psychic abilities," she continued.
"There's a man - a spirit - standing beside you, and he's getting very impatient with
me.
But he assures me that you'd listen."
"Has he got anything to tell me?"
"Yes," she replied.
"Your time has not yet come.
He says you'd know what it means."