Right, oKay - if I was to sit there and ask you "wHEn dO YOu waNt TO rETiRE?" You might say 70, 60 or 22? (me tbh hi)
Well, I'm here to tell you's today you'd be wrong. "So is it possible to retire in five years?" (u tell me u f*cking rat)
"Yeah, I did it. I did it in less than five years." (what do you want, a fucking medal?) "Reason why I retired at the age of 26"
"I actually retired in four and a half years. I retired on my own real estate wealth" (wow i care SO MUCh)
"aGe tWeNTy SIx!111"
Right, okay. Hello. How's it going? I hope you's are all well, now today
I found a video titled "How to invest money in your 20s" and as someone is business minded as myself, you know, uh,
Check my resume (what a legend) I've sold fidget spinners (I bought 19)
I was sat there pretty sure that this video was made for me. So anyways, it's from a chanel called
"Limitless TV" (so original) got a sword with wings on it as its avi. So, you know, it's for winners
also
I've got to say I'm a big fan of their most popular uploads, like: "how to invest money in your twenties" "how to invest money
In your 20s" (im broke hi) and "The effects of watching porn." (an iconic video) They're all a good watch. Now
There's a lot of these types of videos on the internet and they usually done by like white blokes
who've gone a funny shade of red and wear bright orange Oakley sunglasses, no matter what time of year it is.
This one in particular claims to have retired
at the age of 26, but still seems to be working tirelessly, putting out daily content,
even though they're definitely very comfortably rich and definitely, deFIniTElY retired. "Just got back from Thailand, I'm about to go to Amsterdam,
I'm going to Cambodia!" (hopefully to kill your-)
btw @suhagui here (;
It's also obviously got your standard link to sign up for some fantastic life coaching course (fuck off u basic white bloke i see at the pub at 1am)
So, I think it probably goes without saying, but if you're paying good money to a life coach for them to just feed you lines
Like "oH! rise & grinD!" You're a moron. What even is a life coach anyway, like what did they tell you? "Ahh-
'ello mate, how's it going
I was just ringing to remind you to call your mum this weekend and make sure you put the washing on this afternoon" (call me pls & ty)
But I realise YouTube's hardly a proper job, right?
But how do these lot even spend their day "how to become a life coach; so I am a life coach
So I'm kind of qualified to talk about this. I went through the process. It's actually not very hard-" NOoo you kiddin
Oh, oh
(i cant tell what he's saying so like yeah i trIED FOR LIKE 5MINS TO WORK IT OUT BUT I COULDN'T OKAY BYE)
"..blueprint that I was given by my millionaire Mentors and if you hang tight by the end of the video
I'm also gonna give that exact same download of that blueprint to you. "Just start a fifa channel, mate. Sell them Ultimate Team Coins, man.
That'll get you through (i will take ur advice master William Block Head)
"..I just got a pause and just say one of the most important parts of my home
Is mr. Money mailbox" (confused WILLNE Has arrived)
"M R M O N E Y M A I L B O X"
riGHT BOYS - This is Billy, me bin. He's a- he's a big baller "aNd I gOT MYself A GuCCi HAt" (oMg Craig my husband w/ his gucci hat) "ironically
I actually ended up building this house
At the time when I was actually quitting my job (no need to brag m8) So I've been living here now for over ten years - kind of W I L D"
Ah, sounds mental, that. 10 years in a suburban household, dunno how you did it cHRIs(nor do I teach me ur ways cHRIs)
!..Awesome cleaning lady's here" Oh, yeah awesome ones, no regular cleaners in this house. She's also invested in Bitcoin
So if you want to learn more about that, there's a link in the description (buy Will's mERCH ITS LIT UNLIKE JAKE & LOGANS!1!!)
"There's no luck to this, like, when I got started and I got these rules and I learned them from three millionaire Mentors-" Yeah
Lads, There's no luck to this - or tHiS
"I was over ten thousand dollars in debt, I wasn't making enough money to cover my bills. We're talking about living
Deeply deeply deeply below, you know, the poverty level. These three men, none of them wrote books
They never put themself in the public eye. These were just really quiet -
nEighBOUrs-" woah haNG ON
, Chris, Your neighbours? Thought you said you were poor (I'm poor hi)
How you livin' next door at Bill Gates then "and I started following around like crazy, saying guys teach me how to create wealth
Like how do I really do it?"
oH, Can I (idk what he's saying I'm soRRY I'M TRYING HERE)
"My first mentor sat down with me he said Chris here's what you need to do. You're young you're poor you're dumb
You don't got money." Oh, That wasn't very nice of 'em.
I'm sorry, right, but surely if someone does that you don't sit down and go "oHH, be my mentor, please!!"
Tell 'em to shite off and continue living your own f*cking life like everyone else
"..Is you need to get your hands on a house"
Ah, just go up to one and grab it - get it right by the lampposts. (how to get a house 101 with WillNE)
He's then like "oh bought a house, right?
then I kept a couple in the basement for a few months, and made them run Minecraft servers for us, covered the mortgage that "cuz I
I could make a million dollars by snapping my fingers-" wait, go on then. Surely that would be an easier way than filming yourself in
A lime green shirt every day (mayhaps he snapped) "-by snapping my fingers"
Ya mentor didn't teach ya that, did he? "At somepoint, and I'll share a secret just a minute
But what I did is I got 225 homes-"
Now, I can't lie, right? like the first time I watch this I'm sat there going
"wOAh - this bloke has 25 houses!1" but looking back,
right, all he's done is just drew a few green squares and triangles and whacking a little text overlay on there -and I'm stuck there fully
Believing him like with stuff like this, you don't even have to prove it
that might not even be his house, All you need's an editor and a green pen. "They're gonna keep backing me
Follow me!1!"
Oh, My god, this bloke knows what he's doing in terms of watch time.
Like, there's been about 20 million quick cuts in this video, but (uh) make sure you leave the bit where I carry the board downstairs
I want it to be a 20 minute video. ""Do you want to know what that ROI is?
It's like it's too big to calculate you need a calculator and and it's a it's just a really big number!!"
Oh, yeah doing the actual numbers. No, I will leave that out
"My father-in-law just happened to get home from a trip, an anniversary trip to the Bahamas,
And you know, he did he said hey Chris, I had a weird dream
That you and I were gonna go and do real estate together. And I thought man I got so lucky to have this father-in-law
I need more father-in-laws." Hang on, you kind of have two wives Chris no matter how many houses you've got to put them in,
It's not the fucking Sims (an iconic quote by Will Lenney 2018)
"-I'm telling you that if you follow this plan, you better plan to fail cuz this isn't a plan. This is a failure plan
There's a broken plan. This is a guaranteed not get where you want to go." Ah, to be fair
I've got to agree with him on that one. Is anyone else thinking like if this is so good for him
What's he doing on this website? Like fair enough,
you could argue that he's just broadening horizons or he just wants another source of income,
but if this is such a wicked scheme and like the core of your business,
wHy are you sat on the internet tryna seel it to Millennials - doesn't add up man. "and, I mean, my team will actually
Do a little consultation and say all right level with us. What's your age? Where you out what's going on?
And if you say literally I got nothing going for me
But I watch this video and I want some help my team has good news for you-"
You're an idiot, but I will take ya buddy (an icon stan WillNE) "Listen. This video is not about being rich and having loads of money
I live in a great house-" My parents are broke. What should I do? Shoot them. Poverty's a sin (i think that's what he said oof)
"First of all, we're calling this the five-year game plan of awesome." Oh, yeah, course we are, "-because you're awesome
That's your name today. Okay, it's your nickname run with Mr. Awesome, Mrs. Awesome. The secret sauce is what we call
Partnering. What is it?
Very good. It's part,-" hang on Chris, I didn't say anything like Dora the Explorer on (??) did
He does also have a partner on the channel who I personally feel he has a bit of an abusive relationship
with. "-and there's space for a fifth one below Valley Ranch (i dont fucking know what tehy're saying anymore)
(lord save me)
(also hi follow me @suhagui i'm gay as fuck ((; )
Ah - this sexual tension is too much for me to take. "If I lost everything
What would I do?" sign up up to the limitless free realestate.com trial course pre-order now-
you'll be fine. "Special opportunities to get to live with me" you know Chris, mate,
actually, I think I'll be fine "-epic shot with the trees growing outside of the temple
I'm about to lay my eyes on it for the very first time and you know, what made all this possible?"
"The wealth that I created that when I retired at the age of 26-" (humble brag much smh)
oH SHITE OFf mAn
"Retired at 26 - where it all started" Woah,
wait, hang on. Did this bloke retire when he was 26? Bloody hELL CHRis. You should have said!! "Hey, love you kids!
Have a good - have a good, awesome last day of school you guys pumped?!11"
No, Dad man. turn ya hat around, ya 42. To be fair to him, though, he's a bloody mutant him -
Forget the house plan, drop the diet one, right? Anyway, that's the end of the video now
I just wanna say, right, I had a little break last weekend
But I - I've got two more videos lined up before the end of this week. So I - so don't worry
I haven't given up just yet (don't leave us pls)
Anyway, if you have enjoyed
please do leave a like, that would be amazing, if we can hit 40,000 likes that would be absolutely great.
(dunno what he's saying I'm sorry) -Feel free to subscribe, and I'll see you guys later! (love u will xx)