Immigration.
Over the past few days,
outrage has been growing
around the Trump administration's new policy
of taking kids from their parents at the border.
And this issue is not going away.
It's like strip club glitter, you know? Yeah.
The secret, the secret is to use sticky tape.
A lot of people don't know that. Now,
with a lot of Trump's other unpopular policies,
Republican lawmakers have kept quiet and done nothing.
But this time may be different.
REPORTER: A growing number of Republicans are urging
the administration to end family separations.
The president has the ability to stop this if he'd like.
When the president is saying that this is all
on the Democrats, that it's their law,
that's just not right. That's not true.
It's not American to do this.
Well, the White House could change it in five minutes,
-and they should. -I think the whole thing is a hot mess.
All of us who are seeing these images of children
being pulled away from-from moms and dads in tears,
we're horrified.
This has to stop.
I never thought I would say this, but I agree with Ted Cruz.
(laughter, gasping)
Seriously. No, look,
we've given Ted Cruz a hard time on this show,
but let's give him props.
-He wants to solve this problem. -(cheering and applause)
Yeah.
And, and I think we need to solve it
before Ted Cruz decides to go to these detention centers himself,
because these kids have been through enough.
They'll be like, "Please! Please!
"Please, let me out of this cage!
"Let me out! Oh, what's that?
"No, no, keep me in, keep me in.
"Whoa. Is that what you guys have on the outside?
Yeah, no, no. I'll stay in here, I'll stay in here."
So, lawmakers in both parties
are against Trump separating kids from their parents,
and, more surprising,
even Trump is against Trump
separating kids from their parents.
We want to solve this problem.
We want to solve family separation.
I don't want children taken away from parents.
Now, I know you might be a little confused right now.
Like, why would Trump hate the policy that he himself made?
But let's be real, you don't always love everything you make.
-(laughter, gasping) -And, also, and, also...
(cheering, whooping)
...the president,
the president can't just change this policy.
I mean, well, he can
but not without the approval of his most trusted advisors.
And the problem is,
the members of Trump's TV cabinet team,
like, they seem to be fine with everything that's happening.
For instance, here's the Secretary of Inhumane Services,
Laura Ingraham.
Since more illegal immigrants are rushing the border,
more kids are being separated from their parents
and temporarily housed in what are essentially summer ca-camps,
or as the San Diego Union-Tribune
described them today as looking like,
basically, boarding schools.
(audience groans)
Yo, what-what kind of freaky-ass summer camps did she go to?
Was her family just dropping her off every June
at state prison?
She was coming out like, "Camp was so fun.
"We made license plates and shivs,
and I got this teardrop tattoo."
"You only get that if you kill people."
"Yeah."
But just to be clear, once again,
the point is not how nice the places are
that they're keeping these kids in, right?
The point is that the federal government
is snatching kids away from their parents.
If you kidnap someone's kid
but you keep them in a really nice basement,
that's still not okay.
Liam Neeson wasn't like,
"What kind of food are you feeding her?
"What? Sushi?
Well, I guess she has been taken... care of."
(laughter and applause)
That's not how it works.
(cheering and applause)
So...
So, Laura Inglaham-- Ingraham...
So, Laura Ingraham clearly won't be advising the president
to stop separating these families,
and neither will Director of False Equivalencies
Tucker Carlson.
This is one of those moments that tells you everything
about our ruling class.
They care far more about foreigners
than about their own people.
They don't care because no matter what they tell you,
this is not about helping children.
A lot of people yelling at you on TV don't even have children,
so don't for a second let them take the moral high ground.
Wow.
This angry McNugget seriously just said
you can't care about kids unless you have kids.
That is the dumbest logic I have ever heard.
How does Tucker not get that you can care about things
that don't directly affect you?
I'm just glad that he's a TV pundit
and not a doctor.
Be like, "Dr. Carlson,
what should I do about my cancer?"
"Well, I don't have cancer, so really I don't give a shit.
"Yeah, I just don't.
"But, uh, but...
if you ever get hemorrhoids, give me a call. Yeah."
(laughter and applause)
So, top advisors Tucker and Laura
clearly won't let the president change
this policy that he hates so much.
And it's gonna get even worse if he watches Fox & Friends
because Brian Kilmeade was making every single argument
in one sentence at the same time.
As Nancy Pelosi steps over the homeless in San Francisco
to hop on a plane to go to the border
to have her heart bleed for people
-from other countries that are coming here, -Yeah.
understand we are $20 trillion in debt,
we have c-classrooms that overrun,
we have teachers buying their own supplies.
These kids come in. Fantastic, Oprah Winfrey.
I'm glad you're upset about it.
But these kids get fanned out to working-class neighborhoods,
into our society, and then they have to be paid for
by English is a second language,
and then they've got to be schooled,
and a lot of them, sadly,
in my neighborhood, turn into, uh, um...
-MS-13. -MS-13.
What the (bleep) was that?
(laughter and applause)
I'm sorry, that's not an argument.
That was just, like, conservative slam poetry.
Just like, "Pelosi, Oprah Winfrey,
"killing the American dream with MS-13,
teen, teen, teen, teen, teen."
(cheering and applause)
Look...
look, man, the fact of the matter is
separating kids from their parents
is heartless, okay?
And the only way that we can stop the government
from doing it is to demand change.
So get on the phone and call the people
who can actually do something about this.
And I'm not talking about Congress.
I'm talking about the policymakers at Fox News.
Yeah. Call them, 'cause they can do something.
They work for the president, which means they work for you.