How to stop catastrophizing?
I gotcha.
I'm Barbara Heffernan and for almost 20 years I've been helping people transform their lives
by recovering from anxiety and trauma.
And I created this YouTube channel to try to help more people do the same.
And if you support the work that I'm doing here, I would really appreciate it if you
would subscribe to my channel and give me a like on this video and then comment and
let me know what you think.
Today I'm going to walk you through five steps to stop catastrophizing and I'd love to be
able to say five easy steps, five simple steps.
And they actually are simple and easy.
They take a lot of practice.
So five steps that will take some practice, but that will help you stop catastrophizing.
And step number five is almost an Ninja trick.
It's a Ninja trick to get over anxiety.
So hang in there and we will go through these one by one.
So if you want to stop catastrophizing, the first step is to be aware of what you're doing.
So increasing your awareness of your thoughts.
Now how do you do that?
I think that the best ways to do that are mindfulness meditation and therapy.
But then again, I'm a therapist and a mindfulness meditation instructor.
So I guess if you go to a surgeon, he tells you you need surgery.
No, I'm sort of joking, but I really do think that therapy helps to increase the observer
part of your brain.
The part of the brain that says, Oh wow, my thoughts are going in that direction again.
And mindfulness meditation does the same thing.
So both of those combined or separately can really help you begin to be aware of when
you're catastrophizing.
And I talk about both of these things in my video, CBT mindfulness, which I will link
here.
So step number two is to label your thought, label it catastrophizing and know that it's
not true.
So first become aware of the thoughts and then distinctly label it.
Oh, I'm catastrophizing.
That is a catastrophizing thought.
I'm awfulizing whatever word is the most comfortable for you.
But label that thought with what it is and know once you've labeled it that it's a cognitive
distortion.
You can actually say this is distorted thinking.
And even if part of you doesn't believe it's distorted thinking, part of you wants to argue
with me that no, no, this really is a potential problem.
Know, that you have another part that can look at it and say, okay, we've been here
before, we've worried about things like this have never come true.
So I can label this and I can know that this is distorted thinking and this is part of
my anxiety.
Step number three, be keenly aware of the connection between your thoughts and what
they're doing to you physically.
So you know when you go to a movie and you're watching the movie on the screen and let's
say it's a thriller and you are feeling all hyper and you're feeling scared and you're
feeling all excited, your body is producing all the chemicals that go with those feelings
as if it's actually happening.
Now, there might be a little part of your brain that knows it's not happening to you,
but a large part of you is responding to it, right?
Same kind of thing.
If you go to a movie that's sad, you might tear up, you might cry, or a movie that's
joyous or inspirational, you will feel the feelings that the characters are having on
the screen.
Our imaginations are incredibly powerful and our imaginations directly link to the chemicals
we produce in our bodies.
So when your imagination is catastrophizing, your body is experiencing it on some level.
So if you're catastrophizing is like, okay, I had a stomach ache this morning and Oh no,
what if it stomach cancer?
And then Oh my God, I could die soon.
And what about my children?
What are they gonna do?
And as you're going through this story, your body is pumping adrenaline and then cortisol
and all of those fight and flight chemicals are coursing through your body with the story.
So catastrophizing is not just about your thoughts, catastrophizing directly links to
feelings of anxiety that you will have physically.
And then those anxious feelings are gonna make you feel like you need to worry more
either about that topic or something else, but you will just get spinning into an anxious
cycle.
So will you comment below and let us know what you have catastrophized about recently?
We all do this sometimes, all of us, some of us more habitually than others, but we
all do it once in awhile.
So it really helps people know that they're not alone.
So let us know below what you've been catastrophizing about recently.
So as you become aware that these thoughts are creating this chemical reaction in your
body of stress chemicals, you can begin to consciously change how you're breathing.
That would be step number one.
And so diaphragmatic breathing is awesome.
You can go for a walk if you have a pet, sit down on the floor with your pet or pull it
into your lap.
If it's small and pet your pet - like petting an animal, hugging a baby, hugging somebody
else, all of these things help our physiological response system go down.
They really calm us down.
And so stopping your catastrophizing thoughts is not just about changing what is going on
up here.
It's also about changing your behavior and your physiology.
And I know I talk about this so much in so many of my videos, and I do have a free mini
course which leads you through diaphragmatic breathing, a safe place, exercise and grounding
exercises.
And you can sign up for that course.
It's free and the link is below.
It's called the aah! mini series.
And so that's a great tool if relaxing physiologically is hard for you, but there's also lots and
lots of videos on YouTube about diaphragmatic breathing and other guided meditations and
guided relaxation exercises.
So absolutely highly recommend that as a means to stop the catastrophizing thoughts.
Step number four to get over catastrophizing journaling and or a CBT thought log.
Now I talk about a thought like in my video that I will link right here called Cognitive
Behavioral Therapy Exercises - feel better.
And that video gives you a more comprehensive explanation of cognitive behavioral therapy,
how it helps and how it can help you with this kind of thinking.
And today I'm just going to suggest a journaling exercise with your catastrophic thinking.
So when you realize you're having it, when you become aware, you label it, you physiologically
relax a little bit.
And then when you can take some time, which might not be right away but could be later
is fine.
I'd like you to write out exactly what you were catastrophizing.
So find the very first moment that the catastrophic thinking started.
What triggered it?
What little thing was it?
The little stomach ache?
Was it looking at a bill that hadn't been paid?
Was it your boss giving you kind of a nasty look in the morning?
What triggered the entire stream?
And just take a few moments and write that out to its most horrible extent.
And as you do this, I'd like you to think about the fact that our human brains have
this ability to project into the future and we're very lucky we have that ability because
we are hairless toothless creatures who would have been eaten by wild animals a long, long
time ago, which maybe would have been better for the planet, but that's a different story.
But in any case, our ability to project problems into the future is really what has helped
our survival.
However, what seems to be happening today is that we are elevating every little tiny
problem in our lives to survive a level crisis.
And that is causing all sorts of stress related diseases and some pretty unhappy lives.
So knowing that our brain has this ability to project into the future has this ability
to imagine all sorts of things.
How could you take that very first nugget that triggered you and tell an entirely different
story about what's going to happen?
So just give that journaling exercise a chance, you know?
So, okay, so I wake up, I have a little bit of a stomach ache and instead of going to
immediately the worst case, I think, okay, maybe I shouldn't have eaten that ice cream
before bed last night.
Maybe there's a connection there and I'm going to see what happens if I skip the ice cream
tonight.
Maybe I won't have a bellyache tomorrow.
So very simply, just think of what could be another reason for that little trigger.
Your boss giving you a nasty look.
Maybe your boss had a really bad morning, maybe they had a horrible commute.
Maybe something bad is happening in their lives and maybe you could go in and say, Hey,
everything okay?
So use this powerful tool of your imagination to create an entirely different story.
And then the last piece of the journaling exercise is to come back and say, okay, what
needs to be done today about this problem?
And so if anything needs to be done today or this week, you can pop it on your to do
list and then you can take care of that.
But bringing it in, just really the journaling exercise is to let yourself go way out in
terms of the catastrophe way out in terms of totally different scenario coming from
the same events and then bring it all back.
What is the actual problem right now and what do I need to do about it?
Step number five to stop catastrophizing the Ninja trick.
Drum roll please.
The serenity prayer.
Have you done like prayers?
Don't worry if you don't have a belief in God, it's okay.
I will help you get through how to work with the serenity prayer.
And if you do have faith in God, you do believe in a higher power, a spiritual being.
That's also hugely helpful for anxiety.
So the serenity prayer grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the
courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
This prayer really goes to the heart of anxiety.
So if you have a belief in God or a higher power, you can say, God grant me the serenity
or higher power, grant me the serenity.
And if you don't, grant me the serenity can actually be a an invocation to your wise mind,
your internal wise mind that knows what you can and what you can't change.
And most of our anxiety is about those things we cannot do anything about, can't do anything
about them right now because if we could do something about it, we would do it.
So when our imaginations are spinning out to the worst possible outcome, we are usually
five six, seven steps beyond anything we have any control over or anything we can do now.
And the serenity prayer works really well with that physiological relaxation that brings
things back to this moment.
The serenity prayer helps us say, okay, right now, what can I change?
Right now, what can I do about this problem that I'm worrying about?
So I'll use an example from my own life.
When my children were little, I was the sole financial support.
So it certainly occurred to me that things would be really bad if something happened
to me.
So I went and I wrote a will and I got some life insurance and I got some disability insurance.
And those are practical steps that we can take for living in an uncertain world.
We just, we live in an uncertain world, but we don't have to go to the point where we
are imagining all these horrible things happening and thereby hurting ourselves in the present
moment, hurting ourselves physically, our health and our emotional wellbeing.
And so if we take the steps to do something like that, like I put in place a will and
then for the most part put it out of my mind.
I did what I could, and this can be easier said than done.
This is definitely a practice, but repeating that serenity prayer on a regular basis, grant
me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.
I'm stuck in traffic, can't change it.
The courage to change things.
I can.
Okay.
Not much I can change right now I'm stuck in traffic and late for an appointment, but
I know I'll be able to apologize and maybe be honest.
That'd be a good thing.
Or tomorrow I'll know I need to leave earlier.
And then of course the key that wisdom to know the difference, the difference between
what I can and what I can't change.
I mentioned earlier that spirituality or belief in God or higher power can really, really
help anxiety and it's true, but even if we just have a view that the universe sort of
takes care of things, some kind of general faith that can be really helpful in terms
of turning over those things that we have no control over and we might as well, like
we might as well believe that the universe overall will take care of things.
Why not?
You'll feel better and believing the opposite doesn't change anything.
So maybe you get to choose some of your beliefs, but really whether you believe that or not,
it makes no sense to worry about the things you can't control.
So really take a look at your worries, pull them back in, pull them back into today.
Okay.
What's the problem happening right now and is there anything I need to do about it today?
I do believe you can make a lot of progress to stop your catastrophic thinking on your
own and it can also sometimes be very helpful to see a therapist.
So I do have a video on how to find an EMDR therapist and a lot of the tips and tools
I'll link it here are also useful to find a CBT therapist or a different type of therapist.
But if you have anxiety, it's very helpful to find somebody who specializes in working
with anxiety.
And I do work with a handful of people via video.
If you are interested, there is a link below for a free phone consultation with me, so
feel free to click that link and sign up and also feel free to make good use of the free
resources I have here on this YouTube channel, the free mini course that I offer, and I'm
really hoping that these videos are helpful to you.
So leave me a comment, let me know.
Give me a, like if you found this video useful and I look forward to the next time.