In this video.
I'm going to be breaking it down
by love-bombing, by future faking,
when they're manipulating or devaluate
and when they're hoovering so stay tuned.
Hey there, I'm Rebecca Zung and I'm a narcissist negotiation expert.
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Okay.
So let's start off with
when they are love-bombing
they say all sorts of things and
it's not just in a romantic setting,
it's also in a business setting, its whatever setting
necessary because they want to get to step 2.
They want to get to when they can
start taking the love-bombing
phase is like just to groom you leave me I know.
I've been in a business situation with a narcissist myself,
which is actually one of the most
heinous horrible situations of my life
which is why I am on this mission,
which is why I'm on this crusade.
I've not only represented narcissist but I've also
had to deal with them in my personal life.
So I totally understand.
So when they're love-bombing,
they say things like you know,
this is such a perfect relationship,
I can't believe we haven't ever met before.
This is amazing.
We were made for each other.
But you know,
if it's a romantic situation they may say things like
I'm not like those other guys.
I'm not like those other girls.
You're so beautiful.
We were made for each other.
We're soul mates,
even if it's not a romantic situation
they may say things like we're so alike.
We think the same way about everything.
We're so perfect blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
So they really want you to feel like you were like each other's
lost soul mate so that's love bombing,
it doesn't last very long because they really
want to get to step 2 as fast as possible
and that's one of those red flags by the way
and if you want to know more about love bombing,
you can definitely check out my video on love bombing.
Okay.
So and then they get
which is you know as fast as possible
for them because they really want to
get to the part where they can start
you know, getting to their narcissistic supply as fast as possible.
By the way, they go back and forth
between the love bombing and devaluing phase
you know, because they're trying to
manipulate you as much as possible.
So this is where you're going to hear
things like you made me cheat on you.
Just because I didn't do it the way you wanted.
What about your issues?
You didn't let me finish what I was saying.
I didn't like the way you said that and then
you know, if you catch them in lies it's deny, devalue,
deflect ,you know I would say it's like
the D’s deny, devalue, deflect.
They put responsibility on everybody else
and then there's always like that isolation
like you're the only one who thinks that way or
everyone else thinks something else
like to try to make you think that you're the crazy one
and then of course, there's always the gaslighting, right?
Which is to try to make you feel like you're crazy,
like what you're seeing isn't what
actually seeing or what you thought you saw,
what you thought you heard, was it actually it.
You know we talked about that.
Don't you remember?
That's not how it was.
That's not the conversation that took place.
This is the one that took place.
You know that sort of thing
and then discrediting you all sorts of things,
you know, that sort of thing.
So that's more of the manipulating,
the devaluing phase in a nutshell
and I do have another whole video
on Narcissists’ favorite catch phrases,
which you can definitely check out as well
and then if you do, catch them in lies
and they want to get inch back into your good graces
like the narcissist faux apology
like you know, I'm so sorry and whatever
but it and the sorry is like I'm sorry,
you feel that way.
I'm sorry.
You made me do it.
I'm sorry that you see it that way or whatever,
you know, it's sort of like not really an apology
but something like that or it's the future fake which is,
let's forget about the past you'll see in the future.
It'll all be better, it’ll all be different.
I'll be changed.
Why are you focusing on that
or you deserve the best of everything
and I'll be that and I want to be that
for you and you'll see and to try to get you to focus on
what It's going to be in the future and back
to the love bombing sort of thing
that's what sort of a future fake is going to be
and then if it's the thing is over
and the relationship is over and they come
that you know they might, they might try to come back with guilting you.
You're hurting the family.
You're hurting me.
you're you know, they might be a guilt trip or it might be,
you know, hey what you up to?
I saw you with this person or what's going on.
It might be a little ping into your inbox.
It may be a little
I saw this is happening or it might be just a little something,
you know or I only want what's best for you or something,
something like that but I wouldn't
fall for those kinds of things.
So that's kind of it in a nutshell.
If you've seen any of those things,
give me a totally in the comments and I would love to know
what other of narcissists favorite words
you've seen these are only a few of them
certainly not an all encompassing list at all.
This is just a handful of some of their faves
but just a few of some of them.
So love to know what some of the comments are
that you guys have in the comments below and if any of you are dealing with it,
let me know.
You can definitely join my free private Facebook group.
Narcissistic Negotiators with Rebecca Zung.
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and so glad that you're here.
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and remember that today is a great day to start
negotiating your best life.
Today is always a great day to slay
and I will see you in the next video.