[splash]
[harmonica music]
- Welcome to Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives.
This is the first episode we've done in a while,
but we've got a new boom operator,
and we are back in business!
[splash]
[Garet crying]
[whip cracking]
Today we're visiting poor Rosie's Burgers and Fries.
Let's take a look!
Rosie's is known in Nashville
as one of the best burger joints around.
The building itself might not look like much,
but what it lacks in splash,
it makes up for with flavor.
What?
Oh!
And here's Rosie now!
Here we go!
And who is this good-looking man?
That goatee is money, my brother!
- Oh, this is Guy Fieri!
He's on the Food Network!
- Holy Cholula.
Okay.
Ha ha!
Looks like it's April Fool's in Flavortown!
I'm actually the real Guy Fieri, ma'am.
- Oh, I get it.
You're just here to pawn off some free food, huh?
- Well, that is the show!
Tanner: Okay, okay.
You really shouldn't be faking another guy's identity
to get free food, buccarooni and cheese.
- Are you really trying to make me out to be
a liar, liar, grill's on fire?!
- I might be, fettuccini al-freako!
- You leave me bro-valone!
- Hold on!
Hold on!
Now, one of you two is trying to swindle me for free food!
No one eats until we get to the bottom of this,
so start talking!
- Of course.
Now, this is a first, my fellow diner-citos!
I'm being charged with fraud on TV!
- Now, Rosie here has to decide which me, the real me,
is the real me!
- Hey, get your own camera crew, baby back bibs!
- Hey, don't listen to him, Sir Loins-a-lot.
You know I'm the real deal!
Rosie: Stop it!
Enough!
No one makes a fool of poor Rosie,
and no one steals from poor Rosie's diner!
- All right, no one's gotta get hurt.
Hold on now.
- The aioli would ruin the flame decal
on the button-up!
- I'm from the South.
I know what an aioli does to a flame decal!
- For those of you watching at home,
Rosie is threatening me with her homemade garlic aioli,
made with six secret spices--
- Garlic aioli!
- --that'll kick your tastebuds
outta Flavortown's tallest building--
- It's garlic aioli, all right.
- -- and then frame your neighbor tastebuds
for the murder!
- It has garlic in it!
- Okay, buddy, buddy.
If you're the real Guy Fieri,
why didn't you come with your own camera crew?
- What can I say?
There's been some budget cuts in Flavor... City.
- Don't.
You.
Dare.
It's Flavortown,
and as it's mayor, you're under arrest!
You have the right to remain savory!
- Oh yeah.
Well, as the real city councilmember
of Flavor City,
I demand to speak to my flavor... lawyer.
- Okay.
First of all, a flavor lawyer?
That's ridiculous.
And second of all, as mayor,
I am suspending flavius corpus!
- No!
That's uncons-taste-tutional!
- Stop that!
Now you, I don't think the real Guy Fieri would condone
something like that.
And you, you're not jolly enough to be the real guy.
- You can say fat.
- You sure?
Right.
You're not nearly fat enough to be the real guy!
Now, if one of you two is the real guy,
then prove it!
What are your thoughts on barbecue sauce?
- Oh, baby girl,
you could put that on a flip flop and I'd eat it.
- Holy moly, stromboli!
- Good, good.
Now what about barbecue sauce on broccoli?
- Ugh!
Pearls before swine.
- Unholy moly, stromboli!
- Oh, you're not making it easy on me!
Maybe...
[gasps]
Both: My baby!
- Well, I guess there's no way of knowing
who the real father is,
so why don't we just split between you two!
- All right, steak--
- No!
Don't touch my baby girl!
I love you!
- Ha.
[slow clapping]
So, it was you the whole time.
- Welcome to Diners, Drive-ins, and...
- I need a flavor lawyer.
♪♪
- Hey, everybody!
Thanks for watching that sketch.
- [as Guy] And if you liked it,
be sure to download the BYUtv app.
It's free,
and you can see all kinds of awesome stuff!
- Tanner, you can...
You can turn it off; we're done.
- Who's Tanner?
I'm Guy Fieri with the best impression
in the whole cast.
- You see, this is why he's still single, okay.
I don't know how else to help him.
Tanner: Ow.