I've assembled for your pleasure here 7 deadly sins of speaking.
First: Gossip.
Speaking ill of somebody who's not present.
Second: Judging.
We know people who are like this in conversation and it's very hard to listen to somebody if
you know that you're being judged.
Third, negativity.
And another form of negativity: Complaining.
But actually, complaining is viral misery.
Excuses.
We've all met this guy, maybe we've all been this guy.
Some people have a blame thrower.
Penultimate, the 6th of the seven: Exaggeration.
It demeans our language actually sometimes.
For example, if I see something that really is awesome, what do I call it?
And finally, dogmatism.
The confusion of facts with opinions.
I'd like to suggest that there are four really powerful cornerstones, foundations...
The word is HAIL.
So what do they stand for?
The H: Honesty of course.
Being true in what you say.
Being straight and clear.
The A is Authenticity.
Just being yourself.
The I is Integrity - being your word.
Actually doing what you say.
And the L is love.
I don't mean romantic love, but I do mean wishing people well.
Also, now that's what you say and it's like the old song, it is what you say, it's also
the way that you say it.
You have an amazing toolbox, this instrument is incredible.
Register for example.
Now, falsetto register may not be very useful most of the time.
So if I talk up here in the nose, you can hear the difference if I go down here in my
throat.
But, if you want weight, you need to go down here to the chest.
Cause we associate depth with power.
And we have timbre - it's the way your voice feels.
Again the research shows that we prefer voices that are rich, smooth.
There are amazing things you can do with breathing, posture, to improve the timbre.
Then prosody, this is the sing-song, the metalanguage that we use in order to impart meaning.
People who speak all on one note are really quite hard to listen to if they don't have
any prosody at all.
Pace - I can get very very excited by saying something really really quickly or I can slow
right down.
Of course pitch often goes along with pace to indicate arousal but you can do it just
with pitch.
"Where did you leave my keys?!"
And finally volume.
I can get really excited or I can have you really pay attention by getting very quiet.
What would the world be like if we were speaking powerfully to people who were listening consciously
in environments which were actually fit for purpose?
That would be a world that does sound beautiful and one where understanding would be the norm.
Thank you.