-These are our favorite "Jokes of the Week."
[ Upbeat theme plays ] [ Cheering and applause ]
President Trump participated in a Fox News virtual town hall
at the Lincoln Memorial yesterday.
Said Lincoln,
"This is literally the worst thing
that's ever happened to me."
Authorities in Louisiana are looking
for an aggressive chicken
that has chased customers at a local bank
and attempted to climb cars in the drive-through.
Authorities advise anyone that sees the chicken to take a video
because they're bored as hell and they would like to see that.
President Trump did not wear a face mask
while touring a factory in Arizona yesterday
that is producing face masks,
which is still not as bad as what happened
when he toured that pants factory.
According to a new survey, New York governor Andrew Cuomo
and his brother, CNN anchor Chris Cuomo,
were as attractive to New York women
as the Jonas Brothers.
Said New York women, "Listen,
we've been locked inside for a long time."
Hillary Clinton is reportedly appearing
at a virtual fundraising dinner
for former Vice President Joe Biden later this month
and tickets cost up to $50,000.
Wow, imagine paying to sit through that Zoom call --
Hillary stuck on mute,
Biden accidentally sharing his screen of a web search asking,
"What is Zoom?" Actually, you know what?
[ Laughing ] Yeah, I would. I'd pay to see that.
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