- You guys absolutely rocked Plague, Inc.
The video's up to 2 million views now.
I'm reading your comments.
Everybody wants me to play Bio, Inc.
I want to play the newest version, but I don't have a PC.
So let's go Bio, Inc, iPhone, now.
Three, two, one (strange noise).
- [Narrator] John, I'm afraid I don't have
very good news for you today.
First of all, your high blood pressure
combined with your high cholesterol
lead to your severe chest pain.
Additionally, you being a smoker and overweight
put you at risk of a heart attack or stroke.
- I like this game already.
All right, skipping it.
Let's go.
All right, apparently I have to enter my internship here.
Let's go.
Okay, choose the stage.
Let's do unhealthy.
Name your victim. (chuckles)
Oh, man, there's so much I want to do.
All right, I'll keep it simple for now.
Hitler.
Okay, we're gonna keep it mild to start it up.
All right, stage one.
Hitler is overweight, sedentary,
a junk food addict, and a smoker.
Use these risk factors to your advantage
to upgrade your diseases and terminate Hitler
before doctors find a cure.
Oh my god, this is like Plague, Inc,
but you're trying to kill a human?
Let's see what I have to do here, okay.
Bacteria and viruses.
Look carefully.
You need to collect bacteria and viruses to earn points.
Select infect system and tap the bacteria or virus.
Ooh. Ooh.
Got a little upper respiratory virus in there.
Four days in.
Nervous system, renal system.
Skeletal system.
Digestive system, oh, nervous system.
He's got like a,
where do I get it though?
I'm so confused. Renal.
Boom.
What, he had a kidney infection?
My man Hitler had a UTI.
He had pneumonia now.
Bio Points. You have a few bio points.
Tap the bio points to spend your bio points
and upgrade your disease.
Let's change his risk factors.
He's already overweight, right?
So we don't need that.
Oh, we can't afford any of these.
(laughs) A person who is unlucky is subjected to
or marked by misfortune.
Evolve!
Hitler's a very unlucky person.
Oh, man, you could give them diseases?
That's crazy.
Okay, cool.
First I want to go back.
Let's see how Hitler's doing.
17 days in.
Okay, a workaholic is a person who is addicted to work.
No thank you.
We're not gonna make Hitler a workaholic.
Malnutrition.
Yes, 'cause malnutrition is a leading killer
via the obesity epidemic.
Evolve.
Hitler is not eating properly.
Damn skippy.
We're collecting those bio points quick.
Nervous system, bam.
Dehydration occurs when you lose more, yeah.
Dehydration and diarrhea are the world's leading killers.
So let's go. Evolve.
We're gonna get this guy down.
Hitler's dehydrated.
Why am I getting so happy about killing somebody?
Granted it's Hitler, so that makes it okay.
Obese, yeah we're gonna make him obese.
Oh, man, he's gonna be unhealthy.
He's smoking, he's obese, he's got all the risk factors.
I want him to be morbidly obese.
Okay, hereditary.
Yeah, we want him to have hereditary illness.
Hitler has been fledged with poor genes, ha!
God, I feel so evil.
Let's give him some diseases.
Let's go right to the respiratory tract
and give him, oh wow, 24?
Bronchitis, flu.
Let's give him a flu. (coughing)
Oh, he caught a very bad flu.
Now let's see if I can double that up,
and see if I can get him a bronchitis
and a flu at the same time.
Oh, he's sick. (coughing)
You hear him coughing?
Oh, look at his respiratory system failing.
He's getting muscle damage.
Means his kidneys are about to start failing.
Oh, emphysema.
Oh my god, he has bronchitis, flu, and emphysema?
(labored breathing) (laughs) So syked.
Oh, visit to the doctor.
He's going to visit the doctor.
He will investigate.
Hope it's not a good doctor.
It took 22% of his respiratory function to decrease
for Hitler to go see the doctor.
What a lazy bum.
Pneumothorax.
You know what that means.
When his lung collapses.
Yep.
Oh, be careful, doctors are treating Hitler.
Achieve your objective before the recovery progress
reaches 100% or Hitler will live.
I will not let that happen.
He's only at 6% recovery.
I'm good.
He can't recover.
He has one lung and he has three infections:
emphysema, bronchitis, flu.
H1N1.
Swine Flu.
Hit him.
He has a regular flu, Swine Flu, emphysema,
a collapsed lung, pneumothorax,
this guy ain't surviving.
Look at that, I'm hitting him with the pneumonia.
It's impossible.
He can't survive.
(labored breathing) He's at 19%.
Oh, look at his lung function.
He's dying.
There's no way pneumonia, H1N1, flu, bronchitis,
emergency room.
In critical condition, Hitler has been admitted to the ER.
Doctors are now intensifying their efforts to save him.
Oh no, they're healing him.
No way.
He's at 2%.
No way.
Systems failure.
Hitler's system are failing.
Increase failure rate by terminating other symptoms.
What?
He can't live without his lungs!
Oh, nurses on strike.
Honestly, a hospital can't function without nurses.
And this is gonna be proof right here with Hitler.
Hitler's bones are very weak.
He's got rickets.
There's no way he's gonna survive.
If he has multiorgan failure, it's game over for Hitler.
Oh my god, they're speeding up his healing.
Let me do something bad.
Muscular dystrophy or potassium,
potassium deficiency
'cause that'll make his heart go bad too.
Chronic muscle pain.
That's not that good.
I like muscular dystrophy.
He's more susceptible to damage that way.
Both his muscular system
and his respiratory systems have failed.
Oh, let's give him high cholesterol and hypertension.
Oh my god, good luck, Hitler.
Good luck.
All right, all his systems are failing.
(grunts)
All right, everything failed.
Come on, now.
Yes!
Hitler died in 271 days.
Time of death, February 28th.
Cause of death, pneumothorax.
I never thought I would be proud,
at least this proud, to kill a patient.
Although, if it was Hitler,
I still couldn't do it.
My hippocratic oath wouldn't allow me to.
But I'm still really happy in this game.
All right, we're going for round two.
This game hits a little close to home
compared to Plague, Inc.
Because Plague, Inc, you're infecting countries.
It's a little bit more distant.
Here, I feel like I'm being a bad doctor
and actually killing my patient.
But for some reason, it feels kind of good.
Let's do moderate difficulty.
I don't want it too hard.
All right, no more Hitler.
Ted Bundy.
If you watch that documentary on Netflix
by the way, it's crazy.
The Bundy Tapes?
Ted Bundy is overweight, sedentary,
a junk food addict and a smoker.
Use these risk factors to your advantage.
You know, I think I might just go for
the circulatory system failure,
'cause then that makes everything fail.
There's something rewarding about collecting
these little viruses as they pop up.
It's like a dopamine hit each time they pop up like boop!
Boop!
Let's make him obese.
Boom.
Ted Bundy, you now obese, my friend.
Ooh, Ted Bundy has a UTI.
Someone just overhears me in the next room,
"Doctor Mike's giving Ted Bundy a UTI."
What?
Can we make him morbidly obese?
Yeah.
I'm gonna get him all his risk factors,
ooh, how appropriate.
Ted Bundy is about to have unprotected sexual relations.
You get a chance to spin the wheel of STDs.
I'm ready!
Spin the wheel!
Whoo!
Oh, HPV.
That's not even that fun.
HPV infection causes warts.
More than 100 varieties of human papillomavirus exist.
It's dangerous in the throat.
It's dangerous in the cervix for women.
But outside of that, it's not that exciting.
And it's a long term problem.
I want him to suffer now!
I'm gonna make sure that he has
the worse risk factors for survival,
and then hit him with the symptoms.
(exclaims in foreign language)
Oh, malnutrition and hereditary.
He doesn't even have a disease yet,
and he's already falling apart.
Look at that.
Ted Bundy, you done wrong by me.
By the way, fun fact.
Ted Bundy was the first televised murder trial.
Look at that, I'm just full of fun facts today.
Look, being over 60 years old increases disease damages.
That's true.
- [Ted] Them dang kids!
- You hear him?
He's suffering a little bit.
I don't even know why.
I just made him older and unhealthy.
Ooh, dehydration, yes.
And allergies.
Allergies is the over-activation of the immune system.
As soon as I turn on the disease
that I'm gonna infect him with,
it probably gonna be circulatory, he's going down.
Ooh, Ted Bundy's going to a doctor for his annual checkup.
All right, Ted Bundy, you smart, you smart.
But let's see what the doctor's gonna do to you.
Because right now, you don't have any diseases.
It's 'cause I got a doctorate degree
that I know how to kill Ted Bundy.
Be careful, doctor's are treating him?
Treating him with what?
He's not sick.
They're treating him fairly quickly.
I don't like this.
Ooh, placebos.
All medications are now poisonous on Ted Bundy.
I don't know what that means.
That's not real medicine.
Risk factors, drug addict.
Yep, boom.
He has every risk factor in the books.
Okay, watch this.
I'm 190 days in.
It took a while to develop all of these issues.
But watch how quickly I'm gonna take down his heart.
Most people don't know that, but if you take down the heart
everything else will follow 'cause blood doesn't circulate.
It's called shock.
You have many types of shock.
Cardiogenic shock when the heart doesn't beat,
septic shock when it's due to an infectious source.
You see that? We're learning.
All right, we're gonna give him hypertension
and we're gonna give high cholesterol.
Angina.
- [Ted] Ow!
- Yeah, he's having chest pain all right.
Angina is chest pain
from a lack of circulation to the heart.
Bad doctors.
Not all doctors are good.
Some are too busy to work slow.
Yep.
And his circulatory system is failing.
What, disease angina has been cured?
That's ridiculous, man.
Oh my god, he's been admitted to the emergency room
with only 15% of his circulation?
That's not bad.
Wait, he's healing way too quick.
I won't be able to stop this.
No way.
I mean, he should die fairly quickly here.
Ted Bundy is under a lot of stress.
Yeah, his body's dying.
His nervous system's at 46, 45.
Oh, man, it's tight.
All right, I'm gonna try and just kill him right now.
Chronic stress, yes.
Nervous breakdown, yes.
Oh my god, it's coming to the wire!
Let's see if I can stop the recovery.
Oh, nice!
I think I got him right there.
I think that was the move.
I think that was the move!
All right, his nervous system failed.
Now everything should start failing.
All right, let's give him some asthma.
Oh my god, he's at 91%, but everything is failing.
All right, three organs have failed him.
Come on, he can't keep going like this.
Muscular, what can I give him?
Potassium deficiency, that's gonna for sure end him.
For sure!
Oh my god, look how tight it is!
Look how tight it is!
Yes!
Oh, I got way too excited.
Ted Bundy died in 411 days.
Bear, did you hear that?
Come here, we killed Ted Bundy together.
We did it together, man.
Good job.
Good job, I couldn't have done it without you,
my little Newf.
Although, you're not that little.
Okay, thank you.
But that was tight.
He was at 98% cured, but them right away his systems failed.
I think if I was on hard,
I would have to choose a different strategy.
I have Bear hair in my mouth, sorry.
I think Plague, Inc is a little bit more
evolved than this one.
Although this is the free version.
And I think if I play the desktop PC version,
if you want me to do that,
drop it down below in the comments.
I want to do that for sure.
I just have to find a PC somewhere.
But I'm game.
Something I must encourage you to do
is a few days from now, on Sunday at 11 a.m.,
watch my 30 days of vegan video.
It's a must.
But for now, enjoy this playlist right here
of me playing some games.
Operation, Plague, Inc, Surgery Simulator,
Whisper Challenge, even Overwatch.
And as always, stay happy and healthy!
(chill hip hop beat)