(hip hop music)
- Hey everybody, it's your girl Jen,
and today I'm filming the My Perfect Imperfections tag.
And I believe this was created by AndreasChoice
here on YouTube,
and I remember when she first uploaded this video in 2010.
It left such a big impact on my self-esteem,
and this video isn't meant to just like
tear us apart and have us you know talk negatively
about each other.
It's meant to showcase that everybody has insecurities
or things that they have thought about changing.
And so that's why I'll be talking about three imperfections
or flaws that I see in myself,
and then I'll talk about three things
that I like about myself.
And I guess I'll start off with the negatives first
so that way I can just like end it with the positive note.
So let's get started.
The first flaw I wanna talk about are my uneven eyelids.
So my left eye is my good eye.
This is my golden eye.
It's got a nice little crease,
and the lashes do what they're told.
However, my right side did not get the memo.
That's why it makes it look like my right lid
is thicker than my left.
And it's because it is.
They're uneven, it's not symmetrical,
and it's just,
it was a little frustrating when I was like
trying to figure out how to do a cat eye.
Because the lines would always look super uneven.
In college I actually tried to do something about it.
I bought these little like eyelid stickers,
and you literally just stick 'em on your eye
and it trains your lid to fold correctly.
And it worked for like a year or so,
but now it's just back to being this again.
And honestly I'm not losing any sleep over it.
I've come to terms with it,
and the fact that I can see out of both my eyes
is all that I can ask for.
So definitely not taking that for granted.
So my next flaw is probably my biggest insecurity,
and they are my legs.
If I wanna get real specific, they are my calves.
They're so big and muscular,
and growing up I freaking hated them.
I hated my legs so much.
I would always try and cover them up,
and I never felt like,
I never felt girly.
I always felt kinda like brutish
and just kinda manly because my legs were
very strong and thick.
I was actually considering getting a calf reduction
when I was like 19 or 20.
I was saving up for the procedure.
But after reading all those forums and seeing
like the recovery process,
it was just a very invasive procedure.
Like it's not like you're injecting something
or you're putting an implant.
Like you're literally cutting through your muscle,
tearing it out, and then like sewing it back together
and expecting everything to be okay.
Like your calves are such a crucial
muscle in your body.
Even in my delusion it didn't seem worth it
because a lot of the recovery stories are like,
yeah I got my calf reduction surgery.
It's been like seven months.
I still can't really walk or run,
but at least my calves are like an inch smaller.
It just didn't seem worth it to me
because I would never wanna compromise my ability to walk
and run and climb because I love being on my feet.
I love being active.
And I don't think I would've been able to forgive myself
to impair like my legs
for something so superficial.
And even though I'm not like in love with my legs now,
like I've learned to love them in my own way.
Sure they're big,
but they're strong,
and I'm a pretty fast sprinter and I can jump really high.
I love my legs because they're mine,
and they take me from point A to point B.
The last imperfection I wanna talk about is my height.
I am five foot one, so I'm pretty short.
Like I'm not the shortest, but I'm still pretty petite.
And I think this insecurity started to form
when I was a kid.
My mom would always make me drink like
a big glass of milk every day,
and she told me that if I drink this milk
than I would be tall,
and if I was tall I would be successful.
And I remember just pounding milk down.
And you know who would've though,
genetics would play a big factor.
Now I'm the same height as my mom.
I think that my insecurity got worse
when I started to
become more obsessed with fashion and style,
and whenever I looked at models on the runway,
they would be at least five nine or five 10,
and so that was my standard of beauty.
And I thought that I had to be tall
in order to pull off these outfits that I loved.
And that also kinda spurred my obsession
with wearing heels everywhere.
Like I liked wearing those heels,
but I felt like it was almost like a crutch for me.
Because I thought that if I was taller,
then people would take me more seriously.
But now I've realized that it's completely bs.
No one treats you differently because you're taller
or shorter, it's about who you are inside.
And now I'm really starting to embrace my shortness.
I really love the fact that I am very compact.
I can fit in like the economy plane size seat pretty well.
I can even like cross my legs there.
It's nice.
So now let's move on over to the things
that I like about myself.
The first are definitely my collarbones.
I will never forget the first time I got
a compliment on this,
and it was by my friend Ann in the seventh grade.
She looked down and she told me that I had
really nice collarbones.
And in middle school,
I was so painfully insecure,
and that compliment just stuck with me
and my collarbones became my redeeming quality
for everything.
Because everything else had not developed in any way.
(laughing) I just really love how prominent they are.
I love wearing off the shoulder tops
and just any top that highlights this area.
The decollete is such a beautiful part
of a woman's body,
and I feel like it just does not get
the recognition it deserves.
I feel like everyone's focusing on like the boobs
or the butt, but what about this area?
This is just, I don't know,
it needs to, it needs to have some recognition.
So I thought I would shed some light on it.
Next up, I would have to say my smile.
I had braces when I was 15 for eight months.
This tooth right over here actually went all the way in,
so I just got braces to pop that out,
and here we are today.
I brush them two times a day for two minutes
with an electric toothbrush.
And I floss, obviously.
I think oral hygiene is very important.
I really love smiling and just you know
having that good positive energy out there.
It's something that anybody can do,
and it just has like a huge impact.
So whenever you don't know what to do, just smile.
Unless you're doing something like really creepy,
don't smile, that just makes (laughing)
it like even creepier.
For my third thing, I would have to say my hair.
I love how low-maintenance it is.
It doesn't get oily,
and when I curl it, like the curl stays
for like a couple days.
It's amazing.
And I think it's because I trained my hair
not to get oily.
When I was younger,
I wouldn't (laughing) wash my hair,
I wouldn't shower actually.
I like I just wanted to be as like grimy as possible,
and as a result,
my hair just doesn't produce as much oil.
And yeah it's awesome,
now with the invention of dry shampoo it's great.
So I wanted to have a little bonus round
and talk about some internal traits
because I didn't want everything to be just about
like the physical appearance.
So one personality trait that I wanna work on
is definitely the fact that I overthink everything.
I have so many thoughts in my head,
and they're always racing.
And I will just
pick myself apart.
I have a lotta regret on things that I wish
I could've done differently
or things that I could've said,
and it just literally drives me crazy.
It's not healthy to do this,
and so I am making strides on quieting the mind
by just meditating, going to the gym more often.
It's definitely improved,
but still a long way to go.
Lastly for a personality trait,
I would say that I'm a pretty good listener.
I just genuinely love listening to people's stories,
people's days, I just like feeling connected that way.
And I always like to hear everybody out,
even if it's something that I don't necessarily agree with.
Because I feel like by understanding them,
we can just like get to the bottom of why
we are the way we are.
I feel like we're always pressured to be a good speaker
and be a bold personality,
but I actually feel like it's more beneficial
to be a good listener because you learn so much
about other people, about yourself,
and about the world.
And it just gives you so much more perspective.
Alright guys that wraps up this video.
I've been wanting to film this for such a long time.
I just wanted to remind you guys that everybody
has insecurities and everybody has things
that they don't like about themselves.
But it's about accepting the things that you can't
and working on the things that you can.
And I'm gonna tag my girls right over here,
my best friends.
I really hope they do this tag.
If they don't I'm gonna text them and call them
and bother them until they do it
because I'm nosy.
And I would also love for you guys to do the same thing
as well, do four imperfections,
three physical and one emotional.
And then four things that you love about yourself,
three physical and one emotional.
Or I guess you can you know mix and match.
Doesn't have to be three, one, you know,
just you know do what you want.
I would love to read you guys' answers.
I feel like this is gonna be a really exciting
comments section.
Thank you guys so much for watching,
and I'll see you guys in the next one.
Bye, mwah.
(hip hip music)