- [cameraman Jon] So, Blaine,
you wanna tell us what we're-- what game we're playing here?
- [Blaine] Oh, we're playing Snack Attack--
- (drum rolls) - Snack Hack?
- Why, Jon, we're playing Snack--
(Chris talking in background) (drum rolls)
- We're-- We're actually playing this game called--
(drum rolls) (Jon laughs)
(someone laughs)
- We're playing Snack Hack.
- [Jon] Snack Haaaaaaa-- - (others laugh)
- [Jon] Alright, uh, who wants to go first? Who wants to present first?
- Alright, so it's basically--
you know whenever you have pizza the night before
and then you leave it in the fridge
and it's nice and yummy and cold?
- I'm making-- this is a simple pizza.
It's like-- It's like if you want a pizza Lunchables,
but you don't wanna look like a pedophile buying pizza Lunchables.
(Jon laughs) (alert sounds)
- [Blaine] All you gotta do
is you get ricotta cheese, okay?
- [Jon] Okay.
- [Blaine] Scoop the whole thing of ricotta cheese...
I actually do this at home so I'm not even f-(chicken squawks)-ing with you.
- [Jon] Good. This is actually supposed to be real snack hacks.
- We're-- - [Blaine] And then you ta--
- [Jon] We're not supposed to gross each other out
- and do nasty things. - [Chris] It's not my kind of gross.
- It's something I actually do. - [Blaine] And then,
you take some marinara sauce--
- [Jon] (laughs) What are you doing?! - [Jessica] Oh, Jesus.
- [Jessica] Wait-- - [Blaine] You take some marinara sauce.
- [Jessica] That's a large chunk of cheese.
- [Blaine] I know.
- [Jessica] That's why you have diarrhea all the time.
- [Blaine] And then, you put some pepperonis on top.
- Oh sh--
It's so good.
(Jon laughs)
- [Jon] Okay, the judge had-- the judge has to eat it now.
- [Jessica] Okay.
- [Blaine] Put it all in there.
- Oh, God.
- [Jon] Not a fan of the cold marinara?
- It's so-- It's so cold.
- [Blaine] Damn!
- [Jon] Alright, you look like you're ready.
- [Andrew] Yeah, sure.
Okay, so like, I'm a simple man,
I like simple snacks.
And I like to do, like, regular
buttered popcorn, Sour Patch Kids,
classic movie theater snacks.
- You just dump--
- You just dump out that bad boy right in there. - (Jon laughs)
- [Blaine] What?! - [Jon] That just goes right in there?
- [Andrew] You go-- You dump it right in there on the popcorn.
- You know, shake it up.
- [Jessica] (singing) Shake, shake, shake. - [Andrew] We should like--
- We-- We need to get some of the popcorn out of there. - [Jessica] (singing) Shake, shake, shake!
- [Chris] This way, you get diabetes AND heart failure.
- [Jessica] Is this your lunch?
- [Blaine] This is my lunch. - [Jon] You're still eating
your f-(dog barks)-ing pizza?
- [Blaine] Yeah, why not? - [Andrew] Ideally-- Ideally,
you want, like, it to-- the popcorn to be, like,
real hot, like fresh-- fresh out the--
- [Jon] Oh. - [Andrew] out of the microwave.
- (crunching sounds) - 'Cause it kinda like softens up the Sour Patch Kids
to like, really, like,--
- [Jon] Okay. - [Andrew] work-- work together.
- [Jon] Judge. - [Jessica] Alright.
- [Andrew] Now have the Sour Patch-- like,
eat the Sour Patch and the popcorn at the same time.
- [Andrew] Put a blue raspberry kid in there.
- [Jessica] Oh, this is so interesting.
- This is actually not bad,
especially if you're at a movie.
- [Chris] And you're like, "I don't have time
- to eat two snacks at once." - (Andrew laughs)
- [Jessica] Uh-huh.
- [Chris] It's-- The movie's not that long.
- [Blaine] Dude. - [Jessica] Mhm.
- The textures are like vying for--
- for flavor in my mouth. - [Andrew] For supremacy, yeah.
- [Jessica] Yeah. - (Blaine mumbles)
- [Jon] You ready? - [Mariel] My turn?
- [Mariel] Alright. - [Jon] Whatcha got?
- I'm wearing my Mexico jersey today.
- And in Mexico, we have a little snack called "elote".
- Some corn,
some butter, some mayonnaise,
uh, some, like, chili powder, a little bit of lime juice.
- So here I present to you
some popcorn in the style of elote.
- Here we go.
- [Andrew] Okay.
- [Jon] Look at that. What's-- What is on this?
- [Andrew] Even it's in a ramekin!
- [Mariel] Um, we've got some,
uh, uh, uh, lime reduction.
Which is just-- I squeezed a lime over it.
(others laugh)
- And then, uh, it's topped with some Tajín,
some chili powder.
- [Jon] Okay.
- Albeit-- The butter--
I-- I stole--
Uh, Andrew, my competitor,
was very kind to let me borrow a bag of popcorn.
- [Mariel] So I didn't have to-- (mumbles) - [Jon] We're all givers.
- [Mariel] Um, so this is my, uh, little Mexican snack hack.
- (scoffs) Look, everyone wins in Snack Hacks.
- [Jon] Yes.
- [Blaine] That's true. - [Andrew] 'Cause we just all get to eat snacks.
- [Chris] Not me.
- Motherf-(woman gasp)-ucker, that is good.
- It's just popcorn, butter popcorn.
- [Jessica] Can you show us the-- - [Mariel] Lime juice.
- [Jon] Oh, and then this stuff.
- [Mariel] Tajín, baby.
- [Mariel] Sponsor me! - [Andrew] Oh, man.
- [Jon] (sighs) Last but not least,
what the f-(honk) do you got?
- So--
(Andrew laughs)
- One night, I was drunk,
and I was snacking
on some almonds.
And the next day I woke up,
and in my freezer I had put the almonds.
- And--
- [Jon] Did you just freeze almonds?
- And I ate them and I was like,
"This is the best way to eat almonds, frozen".
- [Jessica] This is it?
- [Chris] Go ahead, have a frozen almond.
- [Barbara] How long have they been in the freezer?
- Not as long as they--
- [Chris] It's (mumbles)-- - [Mariel] Not overnight.
- [Chris] Yes.
- [Barbara] So they're just cold almonds.
- [Chris] They're just cold almonds, yes.
- [Blaine] I mean,--
- [Jessica] They are refreshing. - [Blaine] It makes them better.
- [Jessica] It does! (laughs)
- Cold almonds are awesome!
- [Jon] So,
you've had the redu--
the, the, the,
the pizza thingy,--
- [Blaine] The deconstructed pizza. - [Jon] Deconstruzed pizza,
you've had the Sour Patch Kids and popcorn
you've had the Tajín and popcorn,
you've had cold almonds.
What wins Snack Hacks today?
- Me-- For me, personally, I'd say
it's the normal popcorn with the Sour Patch Kids is the first place.
- I'm gonna have to go with yours in second. - {Jon gasps)
- [Mariel] What?! - [Jessica] My Italian-ness came out and, like,
- [Jessica] after my mouth warmed it up,-- - [Mariel] You're fucking racist, dude.
- [Jessica] I was like, "Oh, this tastes like raviolis".
- [Jon] Alright.
- [Jessica] Alright, so, yeah.
- [Jessica] That's my-- - [Jon] Congratulations, Andrew.
Congratulations, you win Snack Hacks today.
- [Jon] Yeah. - [Chris] --cold almonds in here.
- [Andrew] What if we put some cold almonds in there? - (Barbara talking inaudibly)
- [Jon] What if we get some of the-- What if we get some of the--
- [Jessica] Oh, no! - [Andrew] NOOOO!
- [Blaine] Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
- [Andrew] This looks like a fifth grader-- - [Jon] Oh, no!
- (others talking) - [Jon] Oh, no! Oh, nooo!
- [Mariel] I got the-- I think I got the--
- [Jon] You got everything? - [Mariel] I'll dip it-- (mumbles)
- [Jessica] Here. - (Jon laughs digustedly)
- [Blaine] Oh, Christ. - [Mariel] Alright.
- [Barbara] Tha-- That looks real good.
(someone screams in disgust)
- [Mariel] It is not very good.
(everyone talking and laughing)
- [Jon] Please don't do what Mariel just did.
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