I often get into trouble with my family
because I have so many animals.
At the moment I have four small kittens in my home.
And when I sit with my legs like this, and my dress like this,
my entire lap is filled with kittens.
They lie and purr on me.
The gentle way in which they sleep.
All my stress seems to melt away.
In these moments I feel like a multi millionaire.
These small kittens in the house
help me to be present in the moment.
It doesn't help to think back about all those things
that caused me pain.
Because there is nothing you can do about it now.
It has brought me to a place where I've realised that
my pain and my heartache, my anger and my hurt,
were like a grain of sand in an oyster, causing hardship,
helping to shape me.
Because a pearl is not created while lying in the spa.
A pearl is created from the challenges of life.
It has shaped and formed you into the person that you are today.
That was the reason for those hard times...
to shape and form you so that you can look back and say thank you
for the challenging times.
Because it came with a gift, and that gift is only in the present moment.
And how you use that gift to allow your light to shine.
When I arrived here at Theefontein 20 years ago,
I was surprised to realise how cold my heart had become.
It was hard and cold, because I was protecting myself from the hurt.
My heart was dark and heavy.
One day while sitting with Oom Johannes,
my head and heart in a dark place...
Oom Johannes lit a candle, and he said to me,
'Every morning when you wake up'
'light your candle and just observe.'
'Don't think. Just sit and look at the flame.'
'This will help you find your light.'
One step at a time,
day after day, week after week, month after month,
I sat in search of my light.
I kept staring into the flame, but I saw nothing.
My heart was too dark, too angry, too cold.
How long must I wait before I see the light?
And quietly... slowly...
through the darkness, I imagined I saw my light.
At the base of the flame, it is dark.
At the tip, it is an ochre colour.
But in the middle is a flicker of pure gold.
You cannot quit the journey in search of your light
after just one week.
You need to remain open
in the same way that Mother Nature welcomes you
everytime you are with her.
And when you allow your heart to open
your light shines bright like a beacon.
And the light is not for you alone.
The light is there so that wherever you go, those around you will notice.
'Wow, look at the beautiful light.'
'I wonder where their light comes from?'
For those whose hearts have been dark for a long time,
when they see your light shining brightly,
they are reminded that their light is not dead.
If you're questioning why you're here on this earth...
first, you need to light your candle.
And from there, you turn to Mother Nature.
Everything in Mother Nature has a purpose.
Everything in Mother Nature is connected... part of a chain.
And I am not separate from the landscape... I am the landscape.
I am connected to the mountain, the tree, the rock.
When I realise how I connect
then I can say, 'Alright...'
'I am going to take up my place again.'
And in Mother Nature, you will find your purpose.
When I wake up, the first thing I say after lighting my candle is
'Thank you for this life.'
I am grateful to be of service.
Because the reason for us being born into this world
is to be of service.
This life is never just about you.
What is that beautiful poem, I think it's by Kipling....
'This petty little thing called me.'
When you realise that life is a gift,
choose to live a life of meaning,
a life of purpose.
Because only you have that talent,
that creativity, that heart...
and only you can make it count.
Use the gifts that you have been given
to be of service, to make things better.
And when you realise this and reflect back on your life
you can say, 'Thank you for this life.'