Heya playa, there are five signals that you're giving off with your body language that's
instantly turning off your crush and I'm gonna teach you how to fix them right now.
For those of you that are new here, my name is Josh and every single week I make videos
sharing tips, ideas and stories teaching you how to be your best self so, if you want to
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Now body language is a tricky thing to talk about because it encompasses so much.
What you do with your face, how you stand, how you walk, how you talk.
Everything you do with your body, that person is perceiving.
And they may not be consciously reacting or even be able to put into words exactly what
you're doing but, they pick up on the little signals that you give off.
So it's important for you to be conscious of your own signals.
Of your own body language that you're putting out there so you can correct it and fix it
and make it so that your crush can be way more attracted to you.
So the first thing you're gonna wanna work on fixing is your posture.
So many people walk around kind of slumped over with a hunch back and it makes you look
a lot smaller, a lot weaker, a lot less present than they actually are.
Instead they're gonna see a person who's kind of defeated looking.
A person that doesn't really have a lot of pep in their step.
The straighter you stand is gonna make you kind of take up more space and look more confident.
But the problem there isn't so much standing up straight when you're thinking about it,
it's that you tend to slouch and hunch over when you're not thinking about it.
Once you stop consciously thinking about standing up straight, it's gonna happen to you.
It happens to me all the time, so, I've developed a technique called "The Doorway Technique"
that's gonna help you stand up straighter.
It's a pretty simple one, every single time you walk through a doorway, use that as a
way to enter into a room feeling confident and bold about yourself.
Stand up straight, recognize that every single time you pass through any doorway.
I don't care if you pass through two or three doorways in a row, stand up straight every
single time you do it.
If you start to work that into your routine, your body's going to start subconsciously
doing it.
Every single time you pass through a doorway, you're going to stand up straight, and by
standing up straight your crush is going to notice that you're exuding a level of confidence
that you didn't before.
The second body language trick that you're going to want to work on is being more physically
present.
This is a problem that a lot of people run into because they're not physical with the
people they interact with.
So when the time comes for them to hug someone or put their arm around someone, or hold their
hand, it seems so foreign to you.
So how do you start integrating that kind of physicality into your interactions with
your crush?
If you've never been physical with them in any kind of way, how do you start doing it
now?
Well, I think before we even get to your crush, before we start doing anything with them,
you're gonna wanna start doing it with everyone else that you know.
For example, when you're talking to people put your arm on their shoulder and lean in
to listen to them.
This is going to make them feel like you care a lot more about what they're saying and it's
going to start to introduce the fact that you are more of a touchy-feely person.
That for you it's not foreign or weird, it's just how you are.
Or for example, the next time you run into your friend, give them a hug as soon as you
see them.
That's a good way to welcome them back in and it makes it easier for you to start integrating
physical touch into your interaction.
But talking about physical touch always comes with a caveat and that's simply this, you
never want to interact or be physical with someone in a way that's going to make them
feel uncomfortable.
So how do you know that they're feeling uncomfortable?
Maybe they don't outright say that they don't want you to do that.
You have to pay more attention to their own body language.
Are they receptive when you put your hand on their shoulder?
Are they receptive and hold you back when you go for a hug?
If you go to hold their hand, or you go to talk to them in some kind of physical way
like that, how are they responding to you?
They may not outright say that they don't want to do it but, if they're pulling back
a little or they're a little hesitant or they just kind of go silent as you do it, that
might be an indication that being physical with them is something you should stay away
from.
But once you start incorporating these physical touches into your day to day interactions
with people, your crush is going to start to take note of that and they're going to
start to open up and feel comfortable doing that around you as well.
Number 3, this is something that happens to a lot of people and I have a technique to
help you work through it but if you're someone that finds yourself being very fidgety or
nervous, or you look around a lot or you keep tapping your leg on the ground or you just
kind of keep rubbing your shoulders or doing something that's demonstrating this idea of
nervousness around your crush, I know how to fix it.
A lot of times, the reason why you get so fidgety is because you're spending a lot of
time in your own thoughts, you're overthinking things, you're worrying about things that
may not actually be there.
And because of that, you find another way to kind of offset that stress and that might
be tapping your foot or that might be not making eye contact and looking around nervously.
And in those moments, I personally think the best thing you can do is to work on being
still.
Now to be still simply means to take a second to step outside of your own mind, to recognize
you're in this present moment and to focus on your breathing.
I think focusing on your breathing is the most powerful things you can do whenever you
feel nervous.
So how do you do that?
Well, let's do it together right now.
What I want you to do is to sit there and close your eyes.
Yes I know, you might be in a public place or you might be around people but just for
a second, close your eyes.
And then, I want you to take a breath in.
Focus on the air going into your lungs and coming into your body, focus on holding it
there and now let that breath out.
And feel the air kind of leaving your lungs.
We'll do it one more time guys.
Breathe in.
And breathe out.
All we did was take two breaths, but don't you feel just a teeny bit more calmer now?
Maybe whatever was bothering you before isn't on your mind and that's the whole key point
here.
You can close your eyes or keep them open.
Do it when you're in the middle of a conversation or when you're just sitting by yourself, the
whole point really is to just come back to this present moment using your breathing.
When you do that, you're able to calm the tension in your body.
Even if it is only for a few seconds or so.
You're taking your mind off of the things that really make you nervous, and this could
be a super powerful technique when you're interacting with your crush.
Think about it, how many times have you kind of just froze up in that moment and just didn't
know what to say or kind of just got jumbled over your own words or just started to feel
your palms get sweaty and you just didn't know what to do in that moment so it's easier
to just retreat and just not interact with them.
When you do these types of things, your crush is gonna take notice of that.
They're going to see that you're not entering the stage and you're not talking to them with
confidence.
So that's actually going to hurt your chances, so you want to improve your chances, learning
how to be here, be still is going to make a drastic difference guys.
And this is something you should be practicing well before you start interacting with your
crush.
Learning how to take a step back and return to the present moment by taking a deep breath
is gonna help prepare you for the upcoming moments ahead that are going to be stressful
and nervous.
And I think it's important to remember that not everyone is going to be able to just turn
off all of their fidgeting.
There are some people who have nervous ticks, or stutter, or they just can't make eye contact.
And it's ok, remember guys, you're doing the best that you can and I think that's amazing.
Number 4 is one that I think is going to really hit home with you and that's to open up and
not create a barrier between you and your crush which so many people do with something
like this.
One of the weird things that humans tend to do whenever they're in a nervous situation
is they try to find something to grab on to to try to protect themselves, to shield themselves.
If you're at a bar, it might be holding your drink in front of you.
If you're at a party and sitting on the couch, it might be putting a pillow in front of you.
Today, a lot of people use their phone as a protective barrier.
Because sometimes looking at your phone is a good distraction from interacting with the
person in front of you.
And if you're kind of just standing there and looking down at your phone and looking
down at it every so often when you interact with someone, they're not gonna feel like
they have your undivided attention.
They're gonna feel like you're paying attention to this and them at the same time, and because
of that you're not as interested.
So here's what I would recommend doing.
If you're talking to your crush and you have your phone in your hand, acknowledge it.
Say something like, hold on, let me put this way.
Put it in your pocket and turn to face your crush.
Now they know you're paying attention to them and only them.
And this subtle move is going to make all the difference.
They're gonna feel like you're completely invested in the conversation with them and
it's going to come off super confident.
The fact that you're willing to put your phone away because you really do care about what
they have to say is going to make them feel a bit flustered, feel like "wow, this person
actually likes me in some kind of way" and that's a good thing.
And look, I know you're probably thinking but they still have their phone out when they're
talking to me and that's creating a barrier because they're not giving me their undivided
attention, that's gonna happen from time to time.
Remember, your focus here is on your body language.
What you can do to show that person that you're more present.
As you talk more and more to your crush and hopefully get them more involved in the conversation,
the phone will become secondary and eventually it won't be part of the equation.
And the 5th body language trick that you can work on is something I mentioned in a video
over here where I go way more in-depth on the topic but, it's important to make good
eye contact and to speak slower when you talk to that person.
So many people rush out their words or just can't make eye contact and it makes that whole
interaction uncomfortable for the both of you.
Now when it comes to eye contact, you may want to use a technique that I call "Ground
to the Sky" and that's to kind of look down before you start talking to them and to kind
of gradually lift your eyes up to meet theirs.
Once you lift your eyes up to meet theirs, try to hold it there.
Don't try to look around and stuff a lot of times people will look away and then look
at their crush but I think doing this kind of gradual raise of your eyes is gonna make
it easier for you to kind of lock it once you get to the top eye contact level.
And you might be thinking, how long do I hold eye contact?
Do I just stare a hole into them?
But, try to hold eye contact as long as they hold eye contact.
If they look away, it's ok for you to look away.
But always try to return back to making eye contact.
The more you kind of look deeper into someones eyes, the more they're gonna feel like you're
really paying attention to them, who they are deep inside.
You're not just someone casually hearing them and that's that, you're someone who really
values what they have to say.
And that's something your crush will really appreciate because chances are, other people
that like your crush as well, aren't doing these things.
Maybe they casually talk to them or maybe they flirt but they're not creating an experience
where your crush can feel like they're totally enveloped in them.
And when I talk about speaking slower, you're going to notice the instant difference when
I start doing it right now.
For example, if I were to explain this point to you a little bit slower while maintaining
eye contact, doesn't it feel like I'm really paying attention to my words and closely sharing
them with you in a way that's deep and profound much more than if I were to just casually
talk like this at this speed?
It's that little bit of mystery in your voice, in your tone, in how you carry yourself that's
going to make all the difference when you interact with your crush.
Trust me, the other people that are talking to your crush aren't doing these things so
if you're willing to step up your game, you're gonna actually increase your chances and odds
of getting their attention and getting them to feel interested in you.
I really want you to start using these body language techniques when you interact with
your crush.
Don't just hear the information and go about your day, start putting them into practice.
And what I want you to do right now is to check out the video over here where I break
down more body language techniques, things you should probably know when you're interacting
with your crush or anyone else that you want to get the attention of.
They're gonna make all the difference in the world guys so check out the video and I'll
catch you next time.
As always, love and peace.