Renee: Let me paint a picture you've gone on a date and it just happens to be with your
dream woman you connected things are moving exactly how you want it the
intimacy is awesome then reality sets in the alarm clock goes off as you wake up
because you're still single and struggling to find love
I'm Renee slansky for the attractive man team and in this video I'm going to be
brutally honest with you and tell you the seven reasons why you're still
single and struggling to find a relationship
okay let's talk statistics there are currently 3.5 billion women in the world
of which 2 billion of them are aged between 24 and 54 years old now if we
were to break it down I'm guessing that at least half of them are going to be
single that means that there is literally 1 billion women out there who
are looking for love so why then can't you find one to have a relationship with
why are you struggling and going from day to day and never really getting
anywhere well here are my seven reasons for you number seven you don't know what
you want I want you to think of relationship as a road map if you're
here and you want to get somewhere but you don't actually have a point of
reference you're going to get lost in between it is incredibly important
before you actually start looking for love that you know what it is that
you're looking for otherwise you don't have a point of destination on that map
to actually head towards and you won't be able to identify it when it actually
comes along so here's what I want you to do I actually want you to sit down and
get a piece of paper and pen or pull out your phone and I want you to write the
top five qualities that you would use to describe the type of woman that you want
and the type of relationship that you want now working out what type of
relationship you want whether it is a long-term or a casual will help you
narrow down the type of woman you need to actually attract in order to be able
to make that a reality the second thing I want you to do is actually ask
yourself if this is what I want what is it that I actually need to do in order
to be able to make that come into existence do I need to be more proactive
with dating do I need to actually step up my game with my
style do I actually need to initiate more conversation with women you are
responsible for what happens in your love life because you are the common
denominator of everything that you do therefore is up to you to actually be
proactive in making sure that your love life actually becomes a reality instead
of this kind of preppy sort of myth now the clear that you are about what it is
that you truly desire the easier it will be to be able to identify her when she
actually comes along now before I give you the second step you have to
subscribe right here right now number six you need to sort out your baggage we
are all adults now and no one is coming to rescue us what we do and how we
choose to react to life is our problem because we are the common denominator in
our own world this means that once we are our own
problem we are also our own solution and if you're finding that you're dating
girls and putting in all this effort and it actually isn't getting anywhere then
chances are you need to sort your crap out and your baggage is hindering you
from actually being able to progress a high-value woman that you want to
attract isn't going to put up with a guy who allows his past to get in the way of
the present and the future so stop making excuses being bitter being angry
and focusing on what went wrong and start taking accountability and
responsibility for what you can do right now to make sure that your future and
present is even better having a great relationship is about two people who
understand the power of letting go of stuff that isn't serving them anymore
now what I want you to do is I actually want you to do a little bit of an
exercise for me I want you to grab a suitcase and I want you to load it up
with weights and stuff that weighs about 20 kilos and I want you to drag that
around with you maybe even take it on your next day take it to the shops with
you wherever you go take that suitcase with you now obviously that suitcase is
going to be really annoying really obvious and it's going to hinder your
movement and your ability to be able to connect with somebody on an emotional
level why because all they're going to do is focus on that suitcase and all
you're going to think about is I've got this bloody suitcase with me now
obviously this suitcase is an example or a metaphor of
carrying our baggage around with us whether it is your past hurts from your
divorce or your relationships or having women reject and ghost you which we did
a video about okay this is why you need to choose to let go regardless of what
has happened so that you can actually move forward and communicate to an
amazing woman that you are a guy who's dealt with your past and you're ready to
just be there in the present so the question is how do we actually get rid
of our baggage well here is an exercise that I want you to do I want you to
again grab a piece of paper and pen and write down every single person that has
hurt you whether it's male/female someone you've
had a romantic relationship with or maybe even just a family member you will
know because when you think about them it'll really trigger something inside
you once you've actually written down their name and the offense I want you to
hold that piece of paper and I want you to say out loud I forgive you mark for
robbing me in this way and I choose to release you and myself of this pain now
I know that might seem really kind of crazy and I can't believe this woman's
saying is but guys this is actually an exercise that psychologists and
counselors use around the world and if you want to start really getting
progress in this area of your life you have to get to the core root of what
those issues are and make sure that you're actually dealing with them
instead of just living in denial and then wandering five years ten years on
why you're still single number five you are scared of commitment guys you have
to choose to commit if you want to be able to move forward and have a great
relationship now I'm going to say that yes there are a lot of men out there who
are afraid to commit but just because you're in this company of men who don't
want to commit doesn't mean that you're in good company and the reality is is if
you want to actually build something with someone there has to be this
certainty that there is trust between you both that you're on the same page
that you're wanting to say things and that you're both heading in the same
direction it's time to grow up and realize that committing to someone is
not a prison sentence it doesn't limit your
self as a man or what it is that you want to do if it is with the right woman
in fact statistics actually show that maybe you end up married end up being
happier and actually live longer I always like to say a problem shared is a
problem half and aligning yourself with an amazing woman who is able to really
bring the best out of you and make you feel good about yourself will help
reduce stress in your life help you see life from a different perspective should
encourage your dreams and she'll actually give you a joy which you would
otherwise not know about if you are chosen not to commit to her there will
always be some risk involved in commitment that's why it's more
important to get a real clear understanding of who it is that you're
committing to and if you do have a fear of commitment then ask yourself where is
this actually coming from was it because your parents got divorced or was it
because you've been hurt in the past again if you're bringing up that sort of
baggage and allowing that to him to you go back a step and do that exercise
again so you can release yourself of that fear of commitment number four
you're dating the wrong type of woman over and over again hence why you're
getting the same result over and over again now we can't necessarily choose
who it is that we're attracted to or who it is that we really are drawn to and
one a date because we all have a type but I firmly believe that we can choose
who it is that we fall in love with and who it is that we invest into now not
all women are out there trying to suck you dry of your money and take
everything that you have shocker I know there are amazing women out there the
problem is is you can't tell the difference between the good ones and the
bad ones so it's really important that you learn to actually take your time to
get to know someone's character when you date them and the best way to do that is
to see what they are consistent in by putting them under different
circumstances and basically setting the pace don't rush into investing into
someone before you actually get to know a little bit more about who they are now
one of the things they actually do with my clients is I get them to look at
their previous relationships because what happens is is if we're drawn to a
certain type of person there's usually going to be similar characteristics
either in features habits or words that identify that
person as our type now if you have a certain type that isn't actually good
for you I want you to actually do a mug lineup meaning get all your exes not
literally but think about each and every one of those women that you've been
involved in and ask yourself okay were there similar patterns qualities
characteristics in each one of those women that is an indication that that is
my type and that it's not actually good for me then of course we need to
actually make sure that you learn how to educate yourself on how to fall in love
with what is good for you it doesn't mean that you have to give up what it is
that you really desire and go completely the opposite it's more about making sure
that you are able to identify things straight away so that you can stop
yourself from falling in love with the wrong women
and so that you can learn to appreciate the good qualities about maybe women
that you wouldn't initially be attracted to number three you're not making room
for anybody in your life now I understand that as a man you want to
have your ducks lined up in a row you want to make sure that everything's kind
of in place before you invite a woman into your world but the truth is if you
wait too long then she's never going to feel that she can actually have a place
in your world because let's face it you haven't made space for her so this is
why it's incredibly important to make space before she arrives so that she
doesn't have to fight for that position it's not about trying to squeeze her in
when you feel like everything is perfect it's about learning to be flexible and
adjust in such a way that you realize her entering your life is going to
actually add value to it rather than hinder you from achieving your goals so
here's what I want you to do the first thing is this I actually want you to
spend one to two nights a week doing something that if she was with you you
would be doing it with her now obviously she's not in your life right now so what
you can do instead is go out and maybe go on a couple of dates or go and do
social events my point here is that you're already creating this time that
you would have in your weekly routine to fit her in the second thing I want you
to do is I want you to go into your bathroom all your cupboard and
want you to clear a shelf what this does is it means that you're literally
physically creating space in your environment for her and also having a
visual reminder of what it is that you're working for what it is that
you're expected of so that you can start to manifest that awesome girl that you
want into your life number two your standards are either too high or too low
guys stop turning this into a guessing game and just get educated on what
healthy and realistic standard is in a relationship otherwise you're going to
end up alone for the rest of your life now the two biggest indications of a
healthy relationship is peace and progress and if you don't have either of
them then chances are your standards are off course if your standards are too low
then you're never really going to feel that you're satisfied in that
relationship because you're going to have women walk all over you
or you're just not going to be really attracted to that girl on the flip side
if your standards are too high you're going to isolate yourself because you're
going to feel it you're never pleased with who it is that you have and she's
never going to do enough to actually keep you happy okay lastly number one
you don't have a clue about women guys this is pretty big and it is integral
that you get educated on women and it's not hard
literally subscribe to our YouTube channel we give away all the information
that you need to know we aren't this overcomplicated species even if you've
experienced that it's basically a lack of knowledge on knowing what it is that
we want and need in order to be able to feel that we are getting value from you
as a man because the truth is if we don't see you as someone that adds value
to our life we're not going to continue to invest in you and we won't be
committing to you here's the thing a lot of the time we just want to feel that
we're a priority that we have some sort of security in our relationship with you
and that we feel beautiful that's it those are the top three things that we
actually want to know that you're able to bring us now guys if you're someone
that really struggles with understanding women then you have to do one of our
boot camps because we are literally going to teach you what it is that women
want how to actually tap into that and come across as a man that she will
continually desire but if you're also someone that really kind of needs to
steer the conversation and go in the direction so that you can come across as
a confident and desirable man then I want you to download our free escalation
cheat sheet right now the link for that is simply in the bio below or you can
click on the image down below in this escalation cheat sheet we are going to
give you the proven techniques in order to be able to come across as confident
in order to be able to lead the conversation lead the day and do what it
is that you need to do in order to be able to start building the foundation of
a strong relationship if you want to know how we tick then make sure you
invest into this area of your life so that it can just become easier and so
that you can finally move forward okay well that was a lesson and a half of the
hurt that you guys got value out of that and I hope that you really do those
exercises so here's what I want you to do I want you to not really subscribe
and give us a thumbs up because you liked this video hopefully but I want
you to actually comment below and actually say yes I've done the homework
Renee that's all you need to put and then I know that you are actually doing
something at that moving forward in your love life
all right guys that's it for me don't forget to a once again download our free
escalation cheat sheet and do the bootcamp if you need to stop wasting
time in the meantime I'll see you in my next video bye for now