Election season is still not over.
I know, I know.
The runoff election for two Senate seats in Georgia
is happening right now,
and so is the fight over whose votes get counted.
It's the perfect time to bring you another episode
of America's most depressing game show.
Welcome back to "America's Got Suppression,"
the number one game show that figures out which American
has had their voting rights suppressed the most.
I'm Roy Wood Jr. She's Desi Lydic.
Desi, how excited are you to be here tonight?
Oh, not at all, Roy.
Every glimpse at America's failure
to fulfill the basic principles of democracy
breaks my soul a little bit more.
Well, we've got 200 more episodes of this shit,
so buckle up.
? ?
Tonight, we are in beautiful Georgia,
the only place where you can get peaches,
chicken wings and strippers all in the same building.
Now, those are three things I have a crippling addiction to.
Desi, right now,
Georgia's in the midst of a runoff election
for two Senate seats,
so the voter suppression down here
is just... (kisses)
super suppressive.
LYDIC: Our first contestant, Johntá Austin,
is a Grammy-winning R & B songwriter,
-he's more handsome than Roy... -WOOD: Wait, what?
...and he still had to wait 11 hours in line to vote.
He's worked with some of my favorites:
uh, Mariah, Mary J.,
Toni Braxton, Jermaine Dupri.
Wait, wait, wait, wait. You're into '90s R & B?
Oh, yeah. It's the only music I get nasty to.
Johntá, why do you think you have what it takes to win "AGS"?
Okay, well, my suppression is that I stood in line
for 11 hours to cast my vote in the presidential election.
Wow, 11 hours.
No one should have to wear a diaper
to exercise the right to vote.
Uh, no, no, I didn't have to wear, uh, wear a diaper.
Oh. You went in your pants.
I'd go straight in the diaper.
Save the evidence, am I right, Johntá?
I don't know about that one.
Did you ever consider walking away?
No. No, never.
Uh, my grandfather William Harris
was in the civil rights movement,
and he was beaten in Mississippi,
uh, trying to register Black people to vote,
and he was put in jail for a week.
And to-to know that someone went through that
just to get me my right to vote,
um, it was never a question of, you know, getting out of line.
But why were the lines so long?
I mean, did people think they were waiting on a PS5?
When I finally got inside
and recognized there were only ten working machines,
uh, that kind of gave me some clues
as to why the line had been taking so long.
Uh, whereas you go to other counties,
uh, and the demographics might be, uh,
let's call it different,
and they have all of the machines that they need.
Johntá, let's talk about the runoff.
What are you most looking forward to
when you go vote
and wait in line for 17 hours in January?
Uh, well, I'm-I'm hoping that it won't be that long,
but I'm prepared to shit my pants for democracy.
True words. Let's meet our next contestant.
LYDIC: Christine Jordan is a 94-year-old Atlanta resident
who has also produced albums with Mary J. Blige.
WOOD: I'm pretty sure that's a typo, Desi.
-LYDIC: Huh. -WOOD: But in actuality, in 2018,
her voter registration was denied for no reason.
So, on this day when they went to find her voter rolls,
it was as if she did not exist.
They have no record of her voting
in any election ever.
Everything is gone.
Her entire history was deleted.
Ms. Jordan, how long have you been voting at this location?
1968.
WOOD: So, you've basically been voting
since they allowed Black people to vote.
You should have your own dedicated voting machine.
Yes, you should.
You should just walk in, they go, "Oh, Ms. Jordan."
I'm like that at Applebee's. I go to Applebee's,
soon as I walk in, they go, "Mr. Wood, here's your booth."
It should be the same thing.
Jessica, do you think that there could be
some sort of reason for this happening?
Was there a name change?
Was she abducted by aliens
and switched out with another person's body?
I think the aliens are right on track.
She's voted in every election possible.
You know, there's never been a time.
Even the small elections that we have,
so there's no reason for her to have been dropped.
Desi, this woman has spent most of her life at the polls.
You should win just for that.
I think you're right, Roy, but we still need to hear
from our last contestant just to be polite.
WOOD: LaTosha Brown is a cofounder
of the Black Voters Matter Fund.
She's here representing hundreds of thousands of Georgia voters
who were illegally purged from the rolls.
And evidently, she's got a lot of Christmas spirit.
Black Voters Matter is joining several other organizations.
We're suing the state of Georgia
because the Secretary of State in October 2019
wrongfully purged from the voting rolls
200,000 people,
saying that they no longer had the correct address.
We discovered that, in fact,
the majority of those people were still living
in the places that they said that they were.
Ah, the purge. That's the one day a year
where you can have sex with someone outside your marriage.
That's not what that movie was about, Desi.
What movie?
We're talking about 200,000 voters.
If they're not restored by the courts,
they will not be able to participate
in the runoff election, as well.
Well, thank you, Ms. Brown. And I know you've got
to get back to suing the government.
And, Desi, we've got to decide
who's going to win "America's Got Suppression."
LYDIC: Is it gonna be standing in line for 11 hours
and pooping your pants?
WOOD: Or is it gonna be losing your right to vote
after 52 years?
LYDIC: Or the purge of over 200,000 voters?
And the winner of "America's Got Suppression" is...
Ms. Jordan!
Congratulations.
-You are the winner. -WOOD: Hang on.
Hang on, Desi. I'm hearing something from the judges.
They're just saying that they don't have her paperwork.
Oh, no. You know what this means?
It must mean Mitch McConnell wins again.
WOOD: Hold on, Desi.
Mitch doesn't have to win,
not if all these voters come out in the runoff election.
Are you ready to vote again, Ms. Jordan?
With that type of determination, the winner could be democracy.
? ?
Probably still be Mitch McConnell.
Well, that's all the time we have for tonight.
Why does this show still exist?
I think we're in hell.