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a little bit guys notable deflator
my name is Samantha Rodriguez and I am
21 years old and I am raising my five
younger siblings
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destiny was actually one years old when
she lost my mother I don't even think
she was one yet my name is Esther
Virginia and I'm second good I have an
idea that she doesn't remember my mother
at all which is very hard for us to
accept because it just sucks that she
doesn't remember her especially how
amazing my mother was and how much she
loved us so much I want destiny to know
that and to feel that love is it's hard
she was I think four years old when she
lost my father although she doesn't
remember him as much as we do she did
have a very close relationship with him
my mother when I was 15 she was
diagnosed with cervical cancer she was
sick for about nine months it got really
bad towards the end it got bad fast and
around nine months after she was
diagnosed that's when she passed away
from cervical cancer
she was like the rock and her family
losing her we lost a lot of that
foundation but my father he you know he
stepped in a lot and he you know he did
a very good job taking care of us and
the time that he had but he was also
grieving when I was 17 my father as well
got diagnosed with cancer he went
quicker as soon as he was diagnosed I
think it was like a month after he
passed away I've always had like a
motherly instinct with them ever since
my mother passed away so I was already
being like a mother to them even when my
father was still around
when we lost our father I just had to
like people froze and like step up even
bigger
fold your clothes and put them away
because they're gonna be busy all day
today if you guys want to we can I think
it's still cold outside I think we would
survive a little bit time I think I was
like 17 turning 18 I was out of school
and I was actually having a conversation
with the kids about school and how
important it is for them and how I want
to see them be so successful and do
something with their lives that's when I
like I kind of realized okay like if
you're telling them to the way you need
to do it I was the oldest one in my
class and graduated like the oldest one
there and it was a little embarrassing
just to like be that old and still in
high school but it really showed me a
lot of you know like maturity I guess it
shows me like let me know sometimes
school is hard it shows me even if you
mess up or just keep going you can end
up like in a better position I work
part-time and I go to school part-time
and I take care of the kids full-time so
it's a lot to handle but I guess keeping
everything organized and having an
organized schedule is what really keeps
me going you know I would wake up in the
morning at 6 o'clock the big kids the
two teenage girls they will take the bus
to high school maybe grab a quick snack
or something while I make breakfast for
the three youngest ones get them ready
go eat breakfast first and then they'll
brush your teeth get ready for school
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I'll drop them off at the school which
is like a block away he's not too far
I'll come back here do a couple chores
around the house or errands that needs
to be done if I have to do groceries
homework myself I tried to do it while
they're at school and I also work three
days a week in the morning time I think
it's best for me to work while they're
at school can you guys make your bed
before you play come on let's make the
bed before I play get out there with
your shoes that's not how you make your
bed you know we've done this many times
before but this one last I have a very
small limited social life it's kind of
like something I choose as well I could
push in sometime in the weekend if I
want to for friends but I'd rather much
rather spend that time with the kids
instead I think that's more important
for me to have that bond with them
especially while they're young the
ladies on my sister I feel very grateful
because she's like giving up her life to
take care of us I found a dynamic we
really like to have fun and we're very
loving towards each other and always
there for each other ever since our
parents passed away all we have each
other and we really like stick together
even though we'd love to have our
parents retrievers it's really cool
because there's a balance between sister
and figure all the time we can come to
her and tell her stuff and she'd give us
advice as a sister and as a parent it is
definitely a lot of pressure to be
honest I'm not sure how I found the
balance I think I just know in my heart
when it's time to be mom or when it's
time to be sister Michael we call him
Mikey he struggles a lot being the only
boy I can imagine there's a lot of
things that he's into that we're not
into I know he needs his own space to be
a boy and and sometimes I tried to do
boy things with him you know it doesn't
always work out that way when I can't my
boyfriend would step in and take him to
do boy things and I really appreciate
that a lot
this is my mom and dad this is Lisa and
Alex
they're everything to us and have them
here again here there and here this is a
weird baby and our parents are all
around this collage I think it's amazing
since my mom here Lisa Smith we have a
lot of her pictures here we like to have
her big you know reminder of what we're
working towards this is a this is our
family our family is the mix of chaos
and love and that's like the truth you
know this is our kitchen where we do
most of our cooking and family time I
would say since our living room we also
do family time here watch TV together
this is Belle oh that's good this is the
hallway this is our one bathroom that we
all share except for my grandma my
grandma has her own bathroom would give
her her space because she's yeah this is
their bathroom so you know six people
here is it can be pretty tight too much
going on in this bathroom especially
with mostly girls in this house it can
be pretty hectic in there we just try to
do our best to you know take turns and
clean up after ourselves so that there's
no too much hectic mess we're used to
sharing since we're a big family we've
always been in like tight spaces
we're used to sharing so it's nothing
new to us um but I would love to go in
their own space this is where we keep
our parents have their urns and the
pictures and we come here to pray and
just to talk to them when we feel like
we need them we love to have them out in
the open for everyone to see and it's
nice losing my mother was very hard for
us she was everything to us she was so
strong it's just like one of those
people you never thought you would lose
in your life
losing my father four years after it was
like wow like I couldn't imagine like
losing one parent both losing both it
was very tough on us that's when we
really started feeling what it's like
you know like well what is how it was
happening like how can we lose the most
important people in her life it was very
hard for me to like keep my strength in
front of them I never wanted to see like
let them see like the sadness in me
because I wanted to be strong for them
if they see me freaking out I knew they
were gonna freak out you know so I had
to be very strong me and the kids we're
always talking about our parents um
anytime we have downtime and we're just
hanging out in the living room and the
sofa we're always talking about our
parents and that's why we like to keep a
lot of pictures around and just always
keep thinking about them my mom she was
so beautiful and just so uplifting she
was very positive and always wanting to
help others that's something I think I
got from her my father he was a jokester
he liked to laugh a lot and mess with us
alive he was he was more of like a cool
dad you know like very fun and I think
he would just joke with us a lot I was
six when my mom passed away so have like
memory were very short memory of her I
know she was an amazing mother to us and
I do see where Sam get your strength
from doing all of this I have a lot of
good memories of my mom and dad I'm
always always there
and she always taught me how to be like
dog and she would always call me a
little worried
my dad I was my dad's favorite at the
flag I was his favorite like keys to
copy his little cookie I had a very
strong bond of him we would stay up all
night listening to music
my mom was basically my best friend she
taught me so many things how to cook she
never let us follow directions on like
boxes or anything
she's always taught us never follow any
directions on cooking because there's
always a way to make it better than the
box I got a lot of my cooking skills
from her I think me and Samantha both
did a lot of people think it's were
always sad all the time and they like to
gravitate to the sadness but we are
really like so happy we have so much and
although we did lose a lot and doing
those times we were very sad and very
impacted by those situations it brought
us together stronger and better I feel
like a whole bunch of love and gratitude
came from those experiences our whole
life isn't only sad obviously there's
still times where we cry about stuff we
remember feelings that we used to have
with our parents or memories but for the
most part were very happy kids and we do
most things that kids do if not always
gloomy something will help our child or
family well are just so connected
between like love and strengthen we all
have each other's back even with
everything that we have gone through we
know how to stay humble and be grateful
for what we do have because there are
many people in this world that go
through so much and have a lot less than
what we have
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