Good morning, everyone, it's Saturkay, baby, and I'm
your resident debunker Kalen Allen.
And a couple of weeks ago, I posted this five minute craft
video on my Twitter.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
They say five minutes, but I say the lies you tell, OK?
But I'm going to put this video to the test.
So now it is time for Kalen versus the clock.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
All right, so one thing that really bothers me
about these tutorial videos is that they never
tell you what you need or how to even make it.
So after watching it 20 million times, I figured out the items.
All right, let's get started, let's get debunking.
Start the clock.
All right, let's get to cutting.
Oh but hold on, I just got a manicure,
I'm gonna need some gloves.
Thank you!
These are some fancy gloves, where did these come from?
Great.
OK, now I'm going to take this little box cutter,
got to take off the safety, you know.
Gonna cut straight down the middle.
Wow, this cuts very nice, this is sharp.
Is this new?
Oh wait, hold on y'all.
Did it cut all the way through?
Well damn!
I'm already spending like three minutes just cutting
the damn noodles.
Stop the clock!
I've got to take all day to open this thing up.
I knew this was gonna some bull crap.
I'm going to actually take this to my desk
and I'm a cut all these and then we gonna
come back and finish this.
Many hours later.
So as you can see, I have cut my noodles.
I'm sorry for that extra time, I know you probably missed me.
But now we have them cut so now we can get
to actually making the craft.
Start the clock!
So we gonna start with this first one,
we're gonna get our glue.
Four minutes left!
It's a little hard to get out.
It's going to take some time.
Come on now, come on!
No!
This coming out like honey.
I don't have time for this.
[FAST FORWARDED SPEECH]
Three minutes left!
Stop the clock, please.
OK.
So I'm going to need to open this up a little bit more
so we can get some more fluidity out here in these streets.
Oh shoot.
Oh, I got glue on the table.
Start the clock!
Now let's see if this comes out faster now.
There we go!
There go, there go!
Now, see this is what it's supposed to do.
OK?
Boom.
OK, very proud of that.
Now we gonna glue--
that's too damn long.
I'm gonna have to cut this some more.
God damn.
OK.
Well let me glue first.
Start from the top here, and then supposed to go spiral,
so it's supposed to go--
so I guess I'm gonna have to hold this for a while,
so that it sticks.
Where my time at?
Two minutes!
Are you kidding me?
I only got one noodle on here.
Who the hell-- (LAUGHS) Who the hell is over there
testing these out?
Well let me see if it stuck.
No.
OK, gotta go back there.
[FAST FORWARDED SPEECH]
Dead ass, I'm about to quit.
OK.
What in the hell.
This is impossible, it does not stick.
Nothing is-- we-- maybe I should have used a hot glue gun.
OK, well since I can't do a spiral,
let me see if I can just stick it-- now
I got glue all over the damn table.
[FAST FORWARDED SPEECH]
One minute left.
Duct tape, duct tape.
[FAST FORWARDED SPEECH]
OK, let me try and hurry up.
No. (LAUGHS) Oh, shoot.
This is not cute.
Where my box cutter go?
Oh.
I ain't got time for safety.
OK, let me take this side.
[BEEPING]
[BUZZER]
[POP]
Y'all irritating.
Now who was going to do this in five minutes?
I really want to know.
I am confusion.
Well, at this point we just gonna keep going
and just see how long it takes us to do this.
Start the clock.
[FAST FORWARDED SPEECH]
Last time I used the pool noodle?
I don't think I've ever used the pool noodle,
I took swimming lessons, I didn't need no pool noodle.
You see, I didn't need nothing, honey,
I was out there swimming.
Except I never finished because I
could never get to the bottom of the pool to pick up the watch.
That's sad, I kept failing.
What watch?
What-- y'all ain't never done that?
In swim lessons, they put something
at the bottom of the pool and you
got to go like to the bottom and get it?
Somebody used their waterproof watch.
No, it wasn't Rolex!
Oh my gosh, we was broke, don't nobody have no Rolmex--Rolex.
[FAST FORWARDED SPEECH]
Oh yeah, let's see if it stuck.
That's false.
[FAST FORWARDED SPEECH]
Now you know what this look like?
It's ugly.
Ugly.
Well, there you have it folks.
This craft cannot be done in five minutes, period.
But thanks for watching, I want y'all to comment below
if there's another video you want me to debunk.
[BEEP]
Then this gonna go together?
Yeah, look, that works, that works, that works, that works.
See, look at me using my brain.
I'm a problem solver, y'all.
Can somebody hold this for me?