Online Weekend Retreat with Moojibaba
24 - 26 April 2020 (with subtitles)
Be the Calm in the Storm
24 April 2020 Session 2 / Satsang Excerpt
[Mooji] I have a letter here from Natasha.
Ah, beautiful. Hi, Natasha!
[Mooji] You've written, 'I have had glimpses of experiencing the Self,
and periods of stillness
where I can more easily experience this.
My struggle is that I can't seem to bring this stillness or sustain it
when I am functioning in the 'external world'.'
A very common report, I would say.
'I am a practicing doctor,
and to be a good doctor,
I am expected to progress intellectually,
to learn, develop services, etc.
This creates some dissonance within me,
as this feeling of striving does not fit in with
my quest for connecting with the Self.
Can you give some guidance around how to manage this dilemma?
Is it possible to remain peaceful, still,
live a spiritual life,
and still play your part fully
in the 'busyness' and the 'chaos' of the external world,
without retreating, pulling back?
Thank you for reading, Natasha.'
Good question. Good question.
[Mooji] OK, I will just run back over that now, more slowly.
So, you've written,
'I have glimpses of experiencing the Self,
and periods of stillness where I can more easily experience this'.
Or maybe confirm it, or something. That's good.
When you write,
'I have glimpses of experiencing the Self', what does it mean?
[Questioner: Natasha] It's usually if I'm alone,
maybe in nature or somewhere like that.
It's a complete feeling of inactivity, almost.
Inactivity of the mind and stillness,
and just complete calm.
[Q.] But then, it disappears when I am in the rest of my life.
[Q.] And when I'm ... [M.] OK. Yes.
[Mooji] So, this is common, actually,
because the Self, which is not a glimpse to itself,
any more than space is sometimes not space ...
It is always here.
But the way in which we experience,
through our conditioning,
that this body is our home, for now,
and that we are a person living in the body,
along with all the conditioning that stands with the person,
leaves little room for such a profound experience,
to find space to be grounded in that.
Because the personal sense
tends to be a very reactive and resisting energy.
But something is peeping through.
It's not coming from outside, actually.
It's coming from inside.
So, perhaps, as you say, when you're in nature,
when you're not so much
surrounded by movements of a familiar environment,
something inside gives permission to just relax.
Then, in a sense, from the depth of yourself, it rises up;
more peace and stillness and clarity and a calm mind.
You find you did not practice for that.
It's simply arising much more easily
and finding space in moments and situations,
perhaps environments like that, for the moment.
[M.] Now you say, 'My struggle is that
I can't seem to bring this stillness, or sustain it,
when I'm functioning in the external world'.
That is just due to habit.
Because we perceive an 'external world',
and, 'How do I make my way in this network, this labyrinth of life,
and all the things that are presented
to my attention and mind to get engaged with?'
This is a habit and a very familiar way of interacting.
So, that seems to take precedence, somehow.
And then it feels like the recognition
and the space needed to allow a deeper truth to arise,
seems to get eclipsed by the familiar habits.
But don't be discouraged by that,
because, actually, the world of the person and the mind
is not really as deep as you think.
It's quite shallow, actually.
When you give attention to it,
it takes on a certain strength.
But very soon, actually,
you see that it is without real depth.
And you see, for instance, how what you ... Say, yesterday, at this time,
you may have experienced so much,
with friends or whatever your experience was,
it was real in that moment.
And what you taste, your experiencing,
it's gone, everything is gone.
If it were not for memory, you would not retain anything of it.
And that gives a sense of continuity or reality to our experiencing.
But there's something deeper than this, underneath this.
The sense of the person seems to be
at the forefront of your existence.
But I call this, and I have come to see that,
that's more like a mask in front of the real you.
But this real you, I wouldn't call it the body.
The body is also in front of it.
Feelings are also in front of it.
Even memory is in front of it.
Even the act of perceiving is in front of it, actually.
It perceives all things,
but yet, itself, seems to evade detection.
That is the real thing.
But, again, back to what you wrote,
'My struggle is that
I can't seem to bring the stillness, or sustain it,
when I'm functioning in the external world'.
So, you are attracted to the stillness.
You have recognised and tasted it.
And it's a very natural taste for you.
You want to be more in that stillness.
Of course, you'd want it permanently, wouldn't you?
[Q.] Yes. [Mooji] Yes.
[M.] When you discover the real stillness,
and see that it doesn't come and go ...
It doesn't come and go anyway, it's just that your attention and mind
go back to pick up things in familiar settings,
so it appears as though the stillness has gone away.
It is still here!
But something goes in front,
and that becomes the centre of attention. You see? It's like that.
[Mooji reads] 'I am a practicing doctor.'
I want to go back,
because this thing, 'external world', is jumping up for me.
It's such a commonly accepted notion.
When you are in your silence,
you may come to a certain point where
the sense of external and internal may just vanish for you.
I want to tell you something.
As long as there's a struggle
to recognise the truth and the true Self,
then it will seem like there's a conflict
between the peace, the joy, the naturalness of the Self,
and the necessary effort to finish your doctorship,
and all the effort that's needed and required
to complete your studies and everything.
It seems like they're pulling in opposite ways.
But only initially, and only due to our conditioning
and the way that the mind interprets things,
which is not accurately, I've got to say!
But what I would say, also,
is that there is no real conflict, actually.
When you need to study; study, for now.
Don't create, don't imagine, 'Oh, I have to balance the two'.
No. When you study, you study.
If that's also a big attraction for you at the moment, you continue.
But also, when you have time,
you put that time also into your inner research.
One is outer research, one is more inner research.
And for that, I can give you a simple exercise.
And that is, you start with just the natural sense of being.
That's a very natural thing.
Before you make one single effort,
you know that you are!
That's an intuition.
Nobody taught you, you naturally know that you exist.
That feeling of existence is there
before you start to add stories and other things to it.
The basic, intuitive way of knowing that you are,
simply this basic, fundamental feeling,
just, 'I am'.
That feeling, if you don't associate it with
any concept, or story, or history, or desire,
just keep it to itself.
[Mooji] Can you follow this? [Q.] I can. Yes.
[Mooji] So, don't hold onto any thought,
or any intention to do something special, or anything.
Just for a moment, hold onto nothing at all.
And you will find that by holding onto nothing at all,
your Self is still here.
You don't have to hold onto your Self. The Self is still here.
But don't associate any history with that sense of Self,
just the sense of being.
Learn to stay with this, without allowing it to connect up
with any thought stream, thought flow,
or past, or future projections or desires.
If you can do this for five minutes,
just five minutes at a time,
it will build up to a state
where it becomes very natural for you
to be Self-aware, without being combined with other things.
That's very good because it increases the power
of Self-awareness in you,
and creates some distance
between yourself and the things that you perceive.
That is very good.
So it's not a strenuous thing to practice.
But in the beginning, you might find that
the mind tries very hard to put you off this kind of focus.
So, I will not tell you to just ignore your studies.
Let that carry on.
But whenever you have some spare time, remember what I'm telling you.
Just start with the simple sense of being.
Don't develop any story around it at all.
OK? Just like that.
Be one with it.
Just be that. Be one with that.
You'll see the mind coming in to suggest some things.
In the beginning you might get distracted for a while.
But don't be hard on yourself. It will feel fresh for you.
You keep on trying that,
and quickly you will develop some natural recognition
and a sense of inner spaciousness.
This inner spaciousness is very important!
That is the seed.
And that will continue to expand
the inner sense of spaciousness.
Any idea that that is going against your studies
is not true at all.
In fact, you may even be able to study more efficiently
without stress or strain, or conflict.
But when you study; study.
When you sit in your self-contemplation, be with that.
And you'll find that, somehow, the power of self-contemplation
will somehow begin to pervade your studying.
And so, whatever you are doing, not just studying,
but whatever movements are happening in your life,
they'll seem to be happening inside your stillness and spaciousness.
[M.] Have you got it? [Q.] Yes. Yes.
[M.] Ah, yes. Very nice. Very nice.
So, you ask if I can give some guidance
around how to manage this dilemma.
No dilemma. Don't worry. No dilemma.
[Mooji] The mind likes dilemmas. Don't worry.
'Is it possible to remain peaceful, still, live a spiritual life,
and still play your part fully
in the 'busyness' and the 'chaos' of 'the external world',
without retreating?'
So, even what may seem like
a demanding and chaotic field, 'the external world',
may also get transformed
in the way that you perceive and experience it,
starting from your own central self-recognition.
So we can start like that,
and I hope that you will see quite a few videos
that actually keep looking at this kind of point.
But starting with that first,
just isolate yourself from the traffic of sensations and thoughts.
You'll get increasingly good at this.
You'll feel that you are coming into a very natural state
of natural focus and inner spaciousness.
You cannot overestimate or underestimate
the power of this silence.
It is tremendous power!
Sometimes we think that when we're still,
it's like being lazy, being inert, and so on.
But there's so much power!
All energies begin from this silence and this stillness in you.
So, will you follow that, for a bit?
[Q.] Absolutely, yes, I'll try that.
[Mooji] Ah, very nice. Good one, Natasha.
[Q.] Thank you so much. I'm so grateful.
[Mooji] OK. All the best now. [Q.] Thank you.
[Mooji] Very, very good.
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