Made pretty good time.
[wolf howls]
Russ: Dad, didn't they invent christmas tree lots
So people wouldn't have to drive all the way out to nowhere
And waste a whole Saturday?
They invented them, russ,
Because people forgot how to have
A fun, old-fashioned family christmas
And are satisfied
With scrawny, dead overpriced trees
That have no special meaning.
Audrey: My toes are numb.
You see, kids, this is what our forefathers did.
Audrey: I can't feel my leg.
They walked into the woods,
They picked out that special tree,
And they cut it down with their bare hands.
Audrey: Mom, I can't feel my hips!
Yes, honey? Clark?
Audrey's frozen from the waist down.
It's all part of the experience, honey.
There it is.
[choir singing]
The griswold family christmas tree.
Isn't it a little big?
It's not big. It's just...Full.
Dad, that thing wouldn't fit in our yard.
It's not going in our yard, russ.
It's going in our living room.
[teeth chattering]
Ah. Look at it.
It really is beautiful, clark.
Something else, huh, russ?
Yeah, dad.
Isn't it a beaut, audrey?
She'll see it later, honey.
Her eyes are frozen.
The most enduring traditions of the season are best enjoyed
In the warm embrace of kith and kin.