One rule I heard is if you can look at something
and you haven't worn it for a year, it should go.
Yeah.
And I have the same rule with people.
(laughing)
Oh no!
Yeah and relatives.
If I haven't, if I haven't.
Relatives.
Spoken to the, yeah.
People in my life, one of my brothers, we haven't,
and there's nothing personal, we just are both busy.
We haven't really talked and it's been almost a year.
And if we get to a year, I'll never speak to him again.
He's outta my life.
Canceled. Harsh, but okay.
No, you know, and guess what, I'm fond of him.
And he's a really good guy.
Yeah.
But it's just been a while.
It's been almost, it's been about 11 months
and probably 11 months and two weeks.
But who's counting?
Yeah. But if two more weeks go by,
I'll never speak to Justin again.
That's it.
You've got two other ones. It's fine.
Yeah, exactly.
And guess what, Justin may be my favorite of all of them.
(laughing)
That sucks for him.
So that... it's tragic.
But yeah.
And for me, he's actually, I don't think it sucks for him.
It sucks for me because he's a wonderful person.
He's great. He's gotta, I like his.
Why don't you reach out to him?
Because I set up this rule.
He's been avoiding you for a year so this could happen.
[Conan] That's true.
Yeah.
Maybe he planned this out.
I think he planned it out.
Several times I've called him to say hi
and someone's picked up the phone who sounded like Justin.
(laughing)
And then when I say, hey, it's Conan, they quick,
it sounds to me like their voice changes.
And suddenly it's this Greek, an old Greek man.
laughing)
Saying that Mr. Justin is not here.
And I'm like, who are you?
And he is like, I fish for the fish in the sea.
I am the fisherman.
And then he hangs up.
(laughing)
Do you think it's possible that that's Justin?
Yeah. You're being reverse catfished.
Yeah.
You're being fish-catted.
I know.
I'm the, I'm the first person to be reverse catfished
in this modern era.
And guess what?
It happens a lot.
I talk to a lot of people who I call
and I just want to connect to them.
Like, you know, my old writing partner,
Greg Daniels and I'll be like, hey Greg, how you doing?
And it sounds like Greg,
but once I identify myself, suddenly he's Portuguese.
Somehow.
And he sells pans for a living.
I didn't know you could do this.
I'm gonna have to implement some changes.
(laughing)
Yeah. The next time I try and talk to Matt,
I'm just gonna come onto this podcast in a mustache.
Who are you gonna be when I call you, Matt?
And I say, Hey, Matt, this is it's me.
It's Conan.
(speaking gibberish
(laughing)
Oh, okay.
Well I'm sorry, but when Matt does come by
could you tell him that Conan called?
(speaking gibberish)
Okay, all right. Well, very good.
Hey, maybe I'll try and call Sona now.
Hey, Sona. How are you?
It's Conan.
Let's chat.
(speaking Armenian)
(laughing)
[Conan] Wow.
(speaking Armenian)
(laughing)
Is that Armenian or are you doing an impression
of Andy Kaufman as Latka?
Or are you running a tape backwards?
Yeah
(speaking gibberish)
Those are actual, real Armenian words.
Thank you very much.
I, yeah, I actually used my Armenian for the first time.
Yeah, you just said, please, may I have more dried
and pressed apricot?
Okay.
(laughing)
Oh, I'm sorry.
Or did you say dried or pressed pomegranate?
I'm sorry, they were, I was offered two things
while I was there for dessert and that was it.
(laughing)
They both.
You're actually, you're right.
That's pretty much all the dessert we have.
Both times!
I was like, what do you have for dessert?
This is when I took Sona to Armenia, both times.
And I loved it there.
I love the Armenian people
(laughing)
But both times I was,
okay, let's look at that dessert menu.
And they would say what menu?
Yeah.
You can you can have a dried pressed apricot
or a dried pressed pomegranate.
Yeah, that's it.
And I wonder why anybody would avoid you for a year.
(laughing)