here we will explore true facts about
marsupials marsupials uh is this being
the best shot
it looks like pornography not nature
that's better
marsupials he just took it in the noodle
marsupials are meta therians
a group of mammals that split off from
our eutherian ancestors over 160 million
years ago they may look like other
mammals but inside marsupials are hiding
something that doesn't exist
what marsupials lack the ability to grow
a placenta reaches an organ that looks a
bit like a bloody pillow it acts as a
waste and nutrient exchange and protects
the baby from its mother's immune system
which allows human babies for example to
mature inside the warm
trust me the cartoon version is much
better-looking and real thing lacking
the protection of a placenta where
Suqian babies have to get the hell out
quickly
the kangaroo baby emerges after only
seven weeks in the egg huh looks looks
like a dog penis that's trying to escape
run little red rocket run it is blind
but remarkably has fully functional four
limbs and it uses them to climb up the
mothers midline until it reaches the
pouch this looks like Voldemort at the
end of the series the pouch is a bit
like a pocket but it has nipples in it
the baby latches on to the nipple and
the nipple inflates inside the baby's
mouth falling a seal for the next 100
days the baby cannot let go as it
receives milk from its mother to
understand this imagine putting on a
blindfold and sniffing your way across a
shag carpet until you found a nipple
that was just as large as you were and
then thinking I should put it in my
mouth
that is our kangaroo do
I'll tell you right now we are not going
to talk about the Tasmanian Devil
because that is not a polite way to eat
that's starting at the wrong end of the
ice cream cone if you don't I mean I
know it's in Australia and they do
everything reverse down there you've
heard about the toilets if you haven't
supposedly the Australian puts his head
in the toilet bowl and pees upwards just
the opposite of us really who does that
to a chicken the wombat is another
marsupial trying to hide that's
effective
unlike the kangaroo it has a rear-facing
pouch this is because the wombat digs
and lives in burrows here we see two
wombats both good at digging but one is
clearly an idiot on the plus side if
you're a baby a rear-facing pouch
prevents you from getting a mouthful of
dirt on the downside it means there is a
butt hole directly in front of your
doorway they kind of break even really
the marsupials penis we always do this
way I don't want to talk about their
penises it's this should be about the
majesty of nature
it's like reviewing an opera and talking
about vogner's penis no I don't want
research to Google that Jerry fine most
marsupials have two prong penises and
the female has between two and three
vaginas which sounds like a math problem
but I mean we have one to one and it's
not like it's not complicated so now you
know the koalas perhaps the cutest of
all the marsupials but it appears to
have received the short end of the
evolutionary stick Jerry don't bleep it
like that it sounds like I said you
don't even have to bleep dick oh the
koala lives mainly in the eucalyptus
tree and almost exclusively eats the
eucalyptus leaf the eucalyptus leaf on
the other hand has made it clear that it
doesn't want to be eaten by anyone aside
from having very little nutritional
value it is poisonous and very hard to
chew in digest to deal with this the
Koala has evolved a very long hind gut
which ferments the leaves sometimes for
over one
hundred hours a remarkable and complex
adaptation that the Koala could have
avoided by eating pretty much any other
thing baby koalas don't have the
fully developed piping to do this
hindgut fermentation so instead they eat
their mother's fecal pop and then what
is that little popsicle oh it's two
words fecal pap oh oh that's gross
fecal pap is a predigested greenish goo
like you know how a cow regurgitates cud
right when it's like that
except out of your ass and you feed it
to your child the diets of most
herbivore marsupials pose another
challenge the coarse grasses and leaves
wear down their teeth each has evolved a
unique strategy to deal with this the
kangaroo has four sets of molars which
move forward as the front pears wear
down one bats have rootless teeth that
never stop growing the koalas unique
strategy is to have neither of these so
when its teeth wear down it just starts
to death not only that but the Koala has
the smallest brain to body mass ratio of
all the mammals and it has a smooth
brain which means that it hasn't evolved
the think Ethan key parts for example if
you pick eucalyptus leaves which it eats
off the branch and put them on a plate
the Koala doesn't know what to do with
them not a genius animal
however this lack of brain gives the
Koala a discrete evolutionary advantage
in that it does not give up case in
point
koala in the rain no given none
just remember one day you might find a
comfy little place to live complete with
food and shelter but if you notice that
you wake up to a butthole every single
day it might just be time to move on
something something something marsupials
koalas in the rain
no fuss get along cool
koalas in the rain
no fuss get uncle
koalas in the rain
no fuss
you