- Hello, my loves,
welcome to another episode of "Dancers' Corner."
This is a dance advice series on its way to a podcast,
but it's just a little moment where I pop on
and I chat about things
that dancers go through in their journey.
So if you're a new dancer, or you're an aspiring dancer,
you're a professional dancer,
the things that we talk about in "Dancers' Corner,"
I'm sure you have gone through.
So let's jump into it.
Today, we're gonna be talking about how
to build confidence as a dancer,
and it might be something that you have not heard before.
I'm not going to be like, "Just be brave and go do things."
I'm gonna give you like actual advice
of how to build confidence,
And the way to build confidence,
the way that I have built confidence,
and still continue to work to do so,
is changing my perspective.
I wrote change your perspective on everything.
So that's a little, like a little intense, I know.
Guys, I have this like little patch on, because, it's fine.
We have like a little burn, she's healing.
So if there's a patch like flailing on my face, ignore it.
Anyways, so change your perspective on everything.
And what I mean by that is, any experience,
or person who comes into your life,
relationship, audition, blah, blah, blah,
any experience is a learning curve.
It's an opportunity to learn and to grow better.
Opportunity is endless.
So what I wanna say with building confidence
is to shift your perspective in understanding
that not a single audition,
or studio, or competition team,
or college department, or connection to this person,
who's a professional, and blah, blah, blah,
none of those things will be the final opportunity that you,
as a dancer and just as a human being, are given.
I think, oftentimes,
our confidence lowers and diminishes
when we put so much pressure
and so much intensity onto one experience.
You're like, "Oh my God, this dance team,
if I don't make it, that's it.
I suck as a dancer, I'm never gonna make it.
I'm never going to reach my dreams."
Or, "I'm never gonna be able to hang out
with the popular kids."
Take that pressure off of that experience
and just look at it at face value.
What is an audition?
It's an opportunity.
That's literally it, there's nothing else attached to it.
What is a, what is a relationship?
It's an experience.
It's an opportunity to connect
with someone who has a like-mind
and can help you progress in your career.
Is it the end-all, be-all of your success,
and your status as a dancer?
Absolutely not.
So keep that in mind, keep that idea in mind that,
let's take things and people at face value,
instead of putting so much emphasis
and holding, putting them on a pedestal.
No thing or person is above you.
That's just like,
that's constructed just in our own mind.
So that's the first little step is to switch,
switch your perspective on what an experience is.
Confidence, you guys, is just showing up.
It's showing up scared, it's showing up insecure,
it's showing up wholeheartedly.
It's like, "Hello, I'm Miss Auti, I'm here,"
and I'm showing up with my flaws,
I'm showing up with things that I haven't learned yet.
She's flailing.
It's just showing up regardless
of the stage that you're in.
Because if you look at things at face value
and you look at something as just an opportunity,
an experience,
it doesn't matter if you show up perfectly prepared.
You don't need to ever be a 100% prepared
for these opportunities that come your way
because they're just opportunities,
and there's gonna be more of them.
Hopefully this is making sense.
All right, let's see what else I wrote down.
Building confidence is changing your relationship
with experiences and people
that would otherwise make you nervous or worried.
So it's kind of being like, "Oh my God,
the dance team coach is so intimidating."
And then kind of just saying,
"Hey, the dancing coach is also human.
So I'm not really gonna be worried
or stressed meeting her, or him, or they,
I'm just going to show up, and that's it.
Changing your relationship to understand
that you don't need anything or anyone, is gonna be huge.
So a big way to build confidence
and to take pressure off of things that make you insecure
is to know that you don't need anyone or anything
in order to be a fantastic version of yourself.
This sounds a little like,
"I don't need anyone, I don't need anything,"
and that's not what I mean.
I just mean that like these external things
that come towards you,
dance auditions, whatever, job bookings,
connections with professionals in the industry,
those are great,
but you do not need them in order to be successful,
in order to be inspirational.
Whatever your goal is as a dancer, successful,
all of those things are defined by your own terms.
So just know that you don't need any of that,
or those people.
Let's see, you bring me value just by being yourself.
If something doesn't work out,
another path will present itself.
I think that's a huge thing for me
is I don't dwell on things that don't happen.
It's like, "Okay, next,"
because it's not rejection, it's not slowing me down.
It's just saying like,
"Hey, another opportunity is gonna come up,
it's gonna be better for you, just keep moving forward."
So try and think about it that way.
Let's see.
Going into a situation with a nothing to lose attitude takes
a lot of pressure off.
And keeping an open-mind of what the journey will look like.
Okay, take notes on this, you guys, I wrote,
"Keep an open mind of what your journey will look like,
keep an open heart of what lessons will come your way,
and keep an open spirit to receive guidance
and help along the way."
This might seem a little like, "Ooh,"
but think about it.
You keep an open mind of what your journey will look like.
So by keeping an open mind,
you're able to master that idea of like,
"Okay, next opportunity.
I'm not gonna put all my eggs into one basket," right?
By keeping an open heart of what lessons will come your way,
you're just receptive and you're open
to learning along the way,
instead of being so tunnel-visioned into one goal,
it has to be this, right, putting pressure on things.
And then keeping an open spirit to receiving guidance
and help along the way.
Ask people for help, let them guide you,
and also be open of who can help you.
Everybody has value
and everybody has something wonderful to share,
so don't be so quick to shut people out along the way.
Okay, this is really important.
So on a personal note I wrote,
"I personally lose confidence
when I put too many restrictions and rules on myself."
When there's too many guidelines of like,
"Okay, Miss Auti, show up at this way.
Say this thing, wear this outfit, dance this way,
choreograph this way, teach this way,"
I start to like, "Oh my gosh."
I spiral out of control,
because I lose confidence in my authentic self,
and I'm trying to be this different version of myself
and it is not great.
So when you go into a space fully ready
and completely ready to be a 100% yourself,
imperfections, and all,
you will liberate yourself,
and you will be free to be confident.
You'll be free to just be who you are
because you're not setting all of these rules,
and restrictions, and limitations,
and all the synonyms, of how to be.
That robotic side of you
will just fall to the wayside
and you'll be able to be yourself.
Yeah, so this is like a,
it's a big, it's a big concept,
but it's, practice it.
Practice it with every single situation
that you get yourself into.
Take the weight of that situation off,
take the pressure off of yourself.
You will build confidence and security
in yourself by doing so.
The more you put people and situations on a pedestal,
the more pressure you put on different experiences,
the more insecure you will become.
Because if you do not get these things,
or someone doesn't like you, or whatever happens,
it's a lot bigger of an impact
because of how much pressure you put on the situation.
But if you are able to just see things,
see opportunities, see people,
see relationships, blah, blah, blah, at face value,
go in knowing that you're worthy,
go in knowing that you bring value,
just by being yourself,
go in knowing that you have nothing to lose,
go in knowing that opportunity is abundant,
and that if this opportunity doesn't work out,
another one will present itself.
Be open-minded along the path,
be open-hearted to take in lessons along the way,
be open-spirited to receive guidance
from the people around you.
And allow yourself freedom.
Allow yourself to let go of restrictions
of how you need to present yourself and just be who you are,
because you cannot escape that.
You can continue pretending to show up
as a specific type of dance teacher,
dancer, choreographer, whatever,
but you will bite yourself in the butt later
because your true self is just dying to come out.
And the sooner you step into your own light,
you step into yourself,
the more free and the more confident you're gonna feel.
So, hopefully that made sense, my dears.
I do have a quote for you guys,
and I freakin' don't know where I put it.
Let me find it.
While I am finding it, you guys, I just wanna say,
if you wanna be a part of the email list,
I send out a monthly email, it's totally free.
Just go to autikamal.com,
so A-U-T-I-K-A-M-A-L dot com,
and put your little email in there.
I send out some inspo,
you'll be up-to-date on events that we're doing,
it'll be great.
You guys, I had a really good quote for us
and now I don't know where it is.
Here's what we're gonna do.
We're gonna take a little trip into my Pinterest.
If you haven't been on my Pinterest yet,
a lot of you ask where I get quotes from,
and I have a whole board called Words.
It looks like this, hopefully you can see it,
and I put all of my little,
all of my little quotes in there.
Ooh, you know what?
This is a good one.
This one says, "Abundance is a mindset,
abundance is a mindset."
And I love that,
because that's exactly what we are talking about.
"Abundance is a mindset."
So taking opportunities as they come,
and knowing that there are more around the corner,
and allowing yourself to just be secure in who you are
and know that what's meant for you won't pass you by.
So abundance is in mindset, my friends,
you have nothing to lose.
Go, show up, full out, let's go, okay?
I love all of you,
thank you for bearing with me as my face was falling apart,
that's fine.
I hope you're all staying safe and sane out there.
I'm sending all of the love in the world.
Thank you so much for tuning into this episode
of a Dancers' Corner.